


Living in a Fantasy

by Nisha_Never



Category: Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: Banter, Deviation from Plot, Dialogue Heavy, F/M, Fluff, Lighthearted, Not a dark and dreary fic, Sarcasm, Sassy, witty
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-23
Updated: 2020-07-18
Packaged: 2021-03-03 19:48:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 20
Words: 50,212
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24871051
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nisha_Never/pseuds/Nisha_Never
Summary: Leah didn't really plan on much in life, certainly not showing up in Thedas in time to see the start of the Fifth Blight. Along the way she learns she's got a knack for languages, terrible humour and making two Grey Wardens roll their eyes a lot.
Relationships: Alistair (Dragon Age)/Original Female Character(s)
Comments: 5
Kudos: 24





	1. Chapter 1

I remember leaving the party with my friend Katie. I know we walked along a really well-lit street, and that she was laughing - we both were - because she'd just won this amazing scholarship offered to insanely smart people like her. Where I was only just now entering university, Katelyn had already finished her first year. And she was younger than me, by two years. A gnawing sense of jealousy that had hit me unexpectedly at the start of the evening, when I'd shown up to Katelyn's house looking glammed up and been floored by her effortless elegance in a dress that was far less expensive than mine. That same jealousy was buzzing through me once more with a vengeance now, made worse after a long night of Katelyn being totally unaware of the openly admiring stares she was getting from everyone. I knew she'd hate it if she knew about it and I knew that she thought it was me who was the center of attention all the time. I also knew that our friendship was strong enough to withstand one night of petty jealousy from me, but it wasn't enough to stop me nit-picking at her. 

"So you can pick any degree, anything at all, and you still picked Biomedical?" I asked skeptically, my mouth twisting into an incredulous grimace. Like I could somehow think of nothing worse to be doing, nevermind I was yet to even start my own Arts degree. 

Katelyn looked a bit hurt when she replied. "I like science. It makes sense. I get good marks and it's going to help me with the GAMSAT in a few years time plus... oh, I'm talking a lot, but I'm so excited! Leah! This is going to happen, I'm going to make it happen and then Doctors without Borders and then-" 

"The world!" I shouted, air punching and cheering loudly. Half because I wanted her to not talk about how well laid out her future was, again another deep contrast to my own life, and half because I could genuinely see her conquering it. 

Katelyn grinned and laughed so full of joy that she all but danced down the street "Alright, the world it is. Look out world!" 

She looked so genuinely happy that it helped dampen the green-eyed monster that was gnawing at my insides so hard and I grinned, catching her up and looping my arm through hers. "I'm proud of you Katie, I mean I also hate you a little bit, but only in a way that speaks of love and affection" 

The lights changed and we crossed the road. "Well I'm hurt and flattered all at once. If it helps, I'm deeply jealous of your trip to Italy. Good food, amazing scenery, bucket loads of history for three whole months. I'll be neck deep in Uni and you'll be neck deep in Gelato" 

"And Italian men" I added, waggling my eyebrows "I'll get them to help me with my phrasing. One on one lessons in intimate café settings" I grinned wickedly at her as we continued down the street. 

Katelyn scoffed "Those poor men won't know what hit them" she freed her arm from mine and reached for the bag at her side, hand dipping in and fishing out a tube of lip gloss. "You're so good at it though, every time I try and flirt I feel like the entire room is watching me and judging... harshly." 

"Oh Katie, they're watching because you're tall, blonde and blue-eyed. It's your curse" I replied, as lightly as I could, while firmly telling myself that it was a lighthearted joke. 

"And yet it's you, with your Italian heritage, that wins them all over in heartbeats. I think – hey, what the hell is that?" Katelyn's cheery chatter faded away into puzzlement as sirens started to go off. A lot of them all at once cause a cacophony of sound that grew louder quite quickly and made us press hands to ears. 

"I can't hear what you're saying!" Katelyn shouted to me as I tried to talk to her. I swallowed and tried again growing more fearful when the noise didn't abate and when Katelyn still struggled to hear me. Communicating via hand signals and exaggerated mouthing of words we encouraged each other to turn back the way we had come and ran, ears still covered, to the park. The noise that followed us grew louder and more intense and, awfully, seeming to catch up and engulf us. I turned in time to see a green crackling light and a miasma of green smoke travelling rapidly towards us, fear rooting me to the spot for a long moment. 

"Run!" Katelyn screamed, half pushing, half stumbling into me a moment later as we turned and fled. I could feel myself lagging behind quite quickly while Katelyn, whose fitness was yet another area in which she outshone me, had yet to start breathing heavily. She turned back and it was like she couldn't see me, rushing past me and moving deeper into the swirling green air until at last she lost her footing and fell. I tried to follow after her, but my own steps faltered and where moments ago there had been thick green grass there was now only green mist. I sucked in a quick breath and gagged as the mist filled my mouth and lungs, I had just long enough to curse before my world turned black and I fell.


	2. Walking on the Korcari Wild side

When I open my eyes it's to have them rudely probed by grass that it is lurid green and far too close to my eyeballs. I startle back and narrowly avoid falling down steep incline that's inches away from my right knee. Judging from the scuff marks on the edge someone else has made that mistake and I'm happy not to repeat their error. I stand on shaky legs and turn my back to the incline, taking a healthy step away to more level ground. Something is very wrong. I know I've hit my head when I see a patch of space before me sort of shimmer and smudge. I rub at my eyes and blink hard, opening them to see the smudgy space is now closer. My heart kicks up a notch because I feel like this is one of those symptoms they talk about before a stroke – or is that smelling burnt toast? I take a sniff full of air and find it smells more fetid than toasty. This doesn't make me feel much better. Neither does the rapid approach of the smudgy space. So I do what any sensible, right-minded nineteen year old with a recent head injury does and close my eyes tightly and pretend it's not there. 

A whomp of air and a sharp clatter of hard objects hitting each other causes me to jolt my eyes back open. Before me, between me and the smudgy air, is a man wearing armour and swinging a sword. I whimper softly and step back, freezing in place when an angry voice shouts out for me to be still. More people approach, some in metal armour, some in what I can only assume is leather, and arrows zip through the air. I catch sight of what they're fighting and fight down the urge to scream – monstrous creatures, a mess of flesh with horror-movie features of ragged mouths that are too wide and limbs that are too long wearing armour that looks rotten, their scent carried on the air is fetid and putrid, making me want to gag. Two men in particular catch my eye and I mentally shake myself for thinking one of them looks like Alistair. Too many fanfics, too many play throughs, my brain is clearly rattled. And yet... he looks like Alistair. The one next to him looks furious and deadly. His floppy blonde hair is streaked with blood. He manages to look magnificent and arrogant as he lops the head off of the last... oh god, these must be darkspawn. I swallow hard and hug myself tightly. Alistair, darkspawn, blondie... oh, Aedan. He must be Aedan. 

"Are you always so useless?" Possibly-Aedan snaps, turning to me. 

"Me? What was I meant to do? Ask them nicely to go away?" I reply curtly. 

The corner of Alistair's mouth kicks up in a grin and he approaches me slowly, giving me a once over that feels more perfunctory than sleezy. "Are you alright? Any open wounds we need to know about? You can catch the taint from their blood you know" 

"Fine" I say quietly, "I didn't touch them. I'm very picky about who I touch" 

Possibly-Aedan scoffs and bends down to a darkspawn, pressing a vial to its gaping neck wound and filling it with blood. The look on my face must speak volumes because he sneers at me and shakes his head, capping the vial and storing it in his bag. 

"Alistair, are we going or are you still staring?" He snaps. 

"Your friend is so charming, no wonder your party is so large" I say conversationally to Alistair, gesturing to indicate the four of them and giving Alistair a sardonic smile. He huffs a soft laugh, eyes dancing with amusement. 

"Was that the last vial?" Alistair asks and waits for Aedan's nod, "Then we just have to find those treaties. And I'm guessing you'll need to come with us" he says looking at me. Aedan makes a noise of disgust and the others, Jory and Daveth, if I remember the game correctly, give him dark looks. 

"We cannot leave her here" Jory says, "I can watch her" 

"No need" says Alistair, still looking at me. "Come with us?" 

I nod and the cute half smile comes back again for an instant. I flash a quick smile back at him "I'm Leah. Thanks for... well, for..." I trail off and look at the pile of darkspawn pieces "not letting me darkspawn lunch" 

His eyebrows shoot up and his mouth twists into a surprised smile "I'm Alistair of the Grey Wardens. These recruits are Aedan, Jory and Daveth" he indicates each in turn and I nod to them. He opens his mouth to speak again and is shut down by an angry Aedan who demands we continue on. Alistair sighs and gestures for me to join him, and we make our way down the slope and towards some ruins. I hang back, feeling useless and silly as they dispatch a few more darkspawn along the way. Everything makes me twitch and jump, every noise, every flicker of movement from the corner of my eye. It's exhausting and embarrassing because I know that it's very obvious that I'm afraid. Honestly, I'm one step away from sitting down and crying, which makes me furious at myself, which lessens my concentration, which makes me jump scare at everything – and so the cycle continues. 

Finally we reach the ruins and there before us is a very broken chest. The look of despair on Alistair's face is hard to see and I bite my lip, ears straining to hear the footsteps I know shouldn't be too far away. Sure enough moments later Morrigan makes her entrance and I fail completely to bite back my smile. I know she's a divisive character among fans, but I never had a problem with making friends with her. She reminded me so much of Katelyn – stand-offish and cold until you took the time to get to know her, and then she was loyal and fierce and amazing. I feel her gaze slide over me and pause momentarily before continuing on and taunting the group before me. We follow her to Flemeth's house and it's so deceptively small, cute and woodsy that it's hard to imagine that this is the same woman who'll shortly be saving Hawke's family. Or carrying Alistair and Aedan off of the Tower roof. I feel a stab of guilt over the way things are about to unfold and consider telling them to warn them. I'm lost in thought until a hand gripping my wrist tightly shakes me from my thoughts and I look up to see Flemeth staring hard at me. 

"It is a great burden you carry, child, and you will struggle with it endlessly. But you must trust that things will happen as they need to, and your interference will do more harm than good." 

"But-" I say, intending on telling her about all the terrible things that could be prevented. She cuts me off with a cold look. 

"No" she says and images fill my head in rapid succession, most too quick to make sense of, but some standing out in cold and brutal detail: Alistair dying on the tower of Ishal pierced by arrows and body broken, Aedan having gathered no allies and falling before the Archdemon in Denerim, demons pouring out of Redcliffe Castle, and a sickly green miasma engulfing the world and tearing apart the sky. She releases me and I fall to my knees, gasping for air and blinking back tears. Flemeth stands over me and sighs "things could be much worse, girl. Use your wits and keep your tongue in check." 

I nod once and stand slowly, brushing myself off "understood" I say softly and wipe discreetly at my eyes. I can see that Morrigan is intensely curious about what has just happened, and so I lower my gaze to avoid her. 

"If you're done being dramatic perhaps we could have our treaties?" Aedan says tersely. Flemeth gives him a nasty little smile and while they throw barbed words at each other I collect myself. By the time Flemeth is suggesting that Morrigan take us back to through the Wilds I'm calm again and follow them. I have the presence of mind to notice that Alistair is staring at me, hanging back to wait for me to catch up. 

"Are you alright?" He asks softly. 

"Ah, yes, I think so. Long day. Really long" I reply, forcing a laugh. 

"Ye-es, that was convincing" he teases. 

"Could be worse" I shrug "At least there was no swooping" He grins at me and looks surprised when I nudge him with my shoulder telling him we're falling behind the others. For a moment he looks torn, his step falters and then he straightens and nods and we continue on.


	3. Let me see through your eyes

**Aedan POV**

We're challenged at the wooden gates that block off entrance to the encampment. I openly sneer at the guards and eye their farcical gate with contempt. My families ancestral home had better protection on its vegetable garden and it fell, what hope do these fools have? I wait while Alistair dawdles up to the front, eyes only for the girl we found in the wilds, although she says something to him that makes him straighten and remember why we're actually out here. He speaks with forced authority and I want to roll my eyes, but I hold in my temper. It's not his fault and I don't want to make an enemy of him. As we enter the camp my eyes rest on the real source of my fury. Duncan. The man who bargained for my life while my family and our soldiers bled from betrayal. The cold-hearted bastard that offered his assistance to my dying father in return for securing me as a recruit. Then had the temerity to hurry me along when I balked at the idea. Perhaps the sight of my father coughing blood was distasteful to him. Or it could be that my mother standing fierce and proud over his broken body against overwhelming numbers while my childhood friend Rory held the gates with our last remaining soldiers was just too noble for him to stomach. I can't hide the downright hatred I feel for him and he meets my hostile gaze evenly. The understanding and sorrow I see there only heightens my fury and I toss the vials at his feet. 

"As requested" 

He crouches and picks them up, looking for all the world like this is a courteous exchange. I feel Alistair's disapproving gaze and shrug it off. I know he thinks Duncan rescued him from his fate, gave him a choice at a life of his own choosing, but it doesn't mean that he's not being used as well. I've also heard rumours around the camp that Alistair looks remarkably similar to King Cailan and I'm not so dense as to be unable to draw conclusions – how handy to have a potential threat to the current King neutralised in the form of becoming a Grey Warden. Duncan is clever indeed. 

Duncan's gaze is drawn to the girl, and a grudging part of me can't blame him. She's short, dark haired, grey eyed and pretty. Her red dress is unlike anything I've ever seen, sleeveless and short with black leggings and the most impractical footwear I've ever seen. Alistair hovers near her, as though unable to move away. Duncan's demeanor changes when he looks at Alistair, he softens ever so slightly, looks almost sad as he takes in the way Alistair finds excuses to move closer to Leah or catch her attention. 

"Alistair" he says, handing him the vials, "you know what needs to be done" 

"Yes. Right. Of course," Alistair replies, taking them and giving Duncan a flash of a smile. 

"And the girl should go" Duncan says gently. 

Leah ducks her head and mutters something under her breath. Alistair looks stricken "Duncan, wait, this is Leah. We found her out there all alone." 

"It's fine" Leah says and grimaces, "I'll be fine. Thank you again for helping me. Both of you" she looks up at me and smiles quickly, prettily. I incline my head in acknowledgement and she huffs a laugh, turns to Alistair and mimes a curtsey while her lips twitch with laughter and then blushes slightly and walks away. She looks small amidst the towering ruins and I'm surprised when I feel a pang of... something... at her departure. Not quite loss and not quite sorrow, it's a feeling I can't quite pin down. 

"Duncan, please. She's alone and-" Alistair says quietly. 

Duncan shakes his head, "Alistair, the girl cannot stay here. This is a battle." 

"You don't understand. She... I'll watch her. She'll be my responsibility" 

Duncan sighs and his gaze hardens into something similar to the look he gave me when I resisted his offer of becoming a Grey Warden. "Alistair the path you've chosen doesn't allow for personal need, especially during a blight." 

Alistair steps forward, looking determined and desperate "Just this one thing. This one girl. I can protect her, please Duncan." 

To my surprise Duncan hesitates, and then exhales heavily, he gives a small nod of ascent and Alistair's eyes widen. Then as though not eager to tempt fate, he turns on his heel and follows after Leah catching up to her and chatting animatedly as he guides her towards the mages and merchants area of the camp. Hot anger bubbles up inside of me and I scowl. 

"Do we all get new pets, or is Alistair special?" I hear myself ask, and part of me feels ashamed to hear myself say it. Duncan's sigh does nothing to ease my temper and my mouth speaks of its own volition once more, "well, I suppose this way is more fun for you. Once he's attached to her, you can let her die and he can concentrate on doing what you tell him to once more. That's how you keep your Wardens loyal, isn't it? Crush them down? Rip their loved ones from them?" 

"Aedan, I'm sorry that you-" Duncan starts, but I don’t want to hear it.

"No, old man, you don't get to lecture me on sorrow. Proceed with your ceremony. I just can't wait to spend my life catering to your whims. Maybe once I reach Alistair's level of ardent follower I can have a pretty girl to entertain me during the long nights too. I'll be in the training yard until then." I snap, mock salute and stalk away. The perfectly timed sound of Alistair's laughter as he walks away with Leah chases at my heels and makes me feel ashamed. 

**Leah POV**

"Are you saying you don't like my dress?" I ask teasingly as we walk through the camp. Side-stepping past hurrying elven servants and skirting around huddles of soldiers and chantry sisters.

"It's a very nice dress, you look, ah, very nice in it. But, ah, I need.. I mean, you should... Maker's Breath, I need to stop talking” Alistair mutters, rubbing at the back of his neck. 

I grin and for a moment I forget completely that I'm in an impossible world with someone who doesn't exist outside of a game. I can't not flirt, it's like asking me not to breathe. "I think you look very nice in armour. Particularly when you're rescuing me. Do you rescue many women?" 

"You're the first" he replies, reaching out to catch my arm and steer me around a stack of boxes I genuinely hadn’t seen. 

"Well, aren't I special" I tease and feel a bit lightheaded at the look he gives me in return. 

"Very" he says, his cheeks reddening slightly. 

I smile at him and nudge him with my shoulder, "So, my Warden in blood-smeared armour, saviour of my virtue and life, where are we going now?" 

"I'm not sure your virtue was in danger" he says teasingly. 

"You tell the story your way, I'll tell it mine. You don't like my clothes, can we get me more?" 

He gives me a look that warms me to my toes, "I like your clothes very much, but you stand out. And Duncan was right, this is a battle. You'll need something a bit more practical" 

"You just want to get me out of my dress" I say airily, then blush "Oh, wow, I didn't mean to say it like that" 

Alistair coughs and stumbles, glancing at me with a look of amusement and embarrassment "I'm not going to answer, because I'll just make it worse" 

"Probably for the best" I agree, eyes fixed straight ahead. 

We skirt around tent ropes and people clustered near a Chantry sister. Past armourers and mages and finally to a stand set up with goods – clothes and poultices and odds and ends. Alistair waves over the merchant and points to me. The man sizes me up in a way that makes me feel uncomfortable and then calls out. A moment later a slim elvan woman appears and her eyes and ears catch my attention so much that I stare. Alistair nudges me and mutters how it's rude to stare, but I can't stop. She's gorgeous, tiny and petite, with huge silver eyes and long auburn hair. She endures my staring and gives me a timid smile. 

"If you'll come with me, I can show you some clothes" she says. I nod and follow after her to a nearby wagon bed with an assortment of clothing on it. She explains that while there isn't a great selection for elves the clothing is durable and clean. I don't quite understand what she's talking about until I unfold the items and then it dawns on me – they consider me small enough to need this size clothing. It's a compliment and a bit daunting as well, the girl next to me is very slender and I'm worried that my love of chocolate is going to make things tricky. She seems to sense my hesitation and quickly rummages through the pile to find some things and hand them to me, gesturing to a nearby tent. 

"This is being used by my family. They're all out at the moment, you're welcome to change in there" she says. 

I thank her and duck inside. It's clean and everything in here is very well cared for if very old. I wriggle out of my dress, keeping my tights, and try on the first thing in the pile and work my way through. Emerging as quickly as possible when I'm done. I have two tunics over my arm, one blue the other an off white that I'm not a huge fan of, but is bigger and screams 'sleeping shirt' to me, and a dark brown skirt with pockets. I'm wearing a pair of dark brown pants that hug my butt a bit more than I'd like and a red tunic. I catch the elvan girls attention and ask her how I look. She nods and I take that as an all clear, wishing Katelyn was here so that I could get more solid confirmation and feeling a bit vain for caring. I am aware it's a blight and a battle, but at the same time this is my favourite game and I want to look good. For a moment my mind skitters around the how's and why's of my being here, but as I start to concentrate on that idea my wrist flares up in pain – the same wrist that Flemeth held as she cautioned me – and I quickly let the thoughts go. 

I return to the merchant and Alistair, siding up beside him and brushing my hand against his to catch his attention. "Hey" I say quietly as he turns. He smiles at me and I feel my cheeks warm. 

"Better" he says quietly, handing me a backpack, which I stuff the rest of my clothes in. Noticing as I do that it contains some odds and ends alright. A pouch and two vials stand out and I wonder if they're poultices and potions for healing. "These too" he says, handing me a pair of daggers with slightly curved blades and a sharp edge. 

I shake my head "Oh, I don't know how to-" 

"I'll teach you. Please, Leah." 

I nod and gingerly take them from him, giving him a crooked grin, "I don't even know how to carry them" 

He holds up a belt "this goes on your waist, they hang from it. Just wear this on its own for now, we'll work on the rest soon" 

I nod and follow his instructions, still fussing with the way it's sitting when I see him hand over coins. I catch his eye as he finished up and try to speak, but my tongue catches and my cheeks flush. I take a breath and try again "Thank you, and, I'm sorry you had to pay. I'll pay you back, I promise." 

He looks amused and taps the daggers I'm holding "these are just to learn with, you'll need better ones soon enough. Save up for that instead." 

"I'll need a job" I say to myself, "oh, you could pay me to be your friend" 

He quirks a brow and bites back a smile "pay a pretty girl to be my friend?" 

"Hey, don't make it sound like that.” I say, following after him as we turn and leave the merchant, heading back towards the cluster of tents and ropes that are circled close. “I'm particularly about how those kinds of friends" 

"Glad to hear it. Come on then, friend." 

"Maker's Breath, Alistair. You're such a pain" 

He laughs and I follow after him, left, towards the ruins and a group of men, grumbling. 

**Alistair POV**  
Leah shadows my steps as we make our way through the camp. I try to concentrate on my tasks, but I'm painfully aware of her at all times. Always behind me and just slightly off to one side, her gaze darting constantly and taking everything in. Her face an open book for each expression, curiosity at the mages, interest at the Chantry sisters, wariness for soldiers that stare at her as she passes and amusement when I stop suddenly and she bumps into me. 

"Trying to get me to grope you?" She teases, and I can't help the way my cheeks warm as I grin in reply. 

"Damn, she's on to me." I tease back, then hear Duncan's voice as he gathers our recruits up for their ceremony. The thought of what's about to happen sobers me and I sigh. "I have to go for a bit. It's... Grey Warden business." 

"No girls allowed, huh?" She says softly. 

"It's not that" I reply. 

"I know, it's okay, I'll wait. You're coming back, right?" 

The hopeful note to her voice warms me and I nudge her gently, the way she's been nudging me. Her grey eyes flash with amusement and I find myself distracted once more, startling when Duncan calls for me. Leah turns her head towards Duncan as he calls my name and then nods at me, and steps back. I approach the closed off area we've secured for the ceremony and speak the words all Wardens hear at their Joining. I'm saddened and grateful that Leah isn't witness to what happens next, and once Aedan has recovered I help Duncan and our other brothers to give a proper burial to those that didn't survive. By the time we've finished the day is ending and I'm tired. I keep an eye out for Leah as I make my way through the camp, becoming increasingly worried when I don't find her. She's a pretty female in a predominantly male camp and she doesn't know how to fight. My steps quicken and my searching becomes more frantic as my over-active imagination entertains terrible scenarios. It's a huge relief when I see her seated by a fire with Aedan, a bowl in her hand and another resting in her lap. She looks up at my approach and her smile is breath-taking, when she waves me over I nearly have to check over my shoulder to make sure it's really me, and not someone much luckier, that she's waving to. 

"I got some for you" she says, handing me the bowl. I stare at it dumbly for a second and then back at her, taken aback by the gesture. 

"Excuse me, some of us don't have people fetching their meals" Aedan says dryly and stands. 

"Maybe if you were prettier, they would" Leah calls out, snickering at his dark look in reply. 

"Does that mean I'm pretty?" I ask, taking Aedan's spot next to her. Leah busies herself with eating and doesn't reply, but I catch her sideways look at me and grin before starting on my own food. We eat in companionable silence. 

"Where are you from?" I ask her once we're finished, "you sound Ferelden, but your clothes were so unusual" 

"Would you believe I was on my way to a fancy dress party?" She asks weakly, huffing when I shake my head. "Dammit, well, what about 'from far, far away'? That work for you?" 

"Nope, keep trying" Aedan says, joining us once more. 

Leah looks defeated and sighs "You'll never believe me" 

"Try me" he says, sitting on the ground next to her and leaning back onto the makeshift bench we're sitting on. 

"Your hair needs washing" Leah says, brushing her fingers over his hair. Aedan reaches up, grabs her hand and places it back on her lap. 

"Thank you. Now answer the question" 

There's a long moment of quiet between us as we wait for Leah to reply. Around us the camp is far from quiet, soldiers train or eat or sleep. Chantry sisters are calling out evening prayers. Someone with a slight amount of musical talent is trying to sing and play the lute and in the distance the nighttime calls of animals in the Wilds can be heard. 

"It’s a city called Brisbane in a country called Australia. I doubt you've heard of it" she says quietly. 

"Never" Aedan says, sounding almost bored, "and that's unusual given my education. I think you're lying" 

"I don't really care what you think" she says sadly and Aedan scoffs. I frown at him and place a finger against the back of her hand to catch her attention. She looks up at me with those big grey eyes and my question falls out of my head instantly. After a moment of silence she quirks a smile at me and I realise I'm being an idiot. Leah shrugs and blinks, as she does a tear escapes and races down her cheek. My hand moves of its own volition and I catch it as I touch her cheek. 

"Hey, it's alright." I say softly, ignoring Aedan's snarky comment and concentrating on Leah's watery smile. 

"How did you get here then, from this place that's so far away?" Aedan asks 

"I have no idea." Leah says, "I was walking home with my friend, Katelyn, and everything was normal. We were laughing and then there was noise, like every siren and alarm in the city was going off at once. It was deafening. And green smoke everywhere. It was scary... we ran and... I-I don't know really. I'm not as fast as Katie and she was shouting something, but I couldn't hear her. Then we fell and... and I was here and the air was smudgy and you and Alistair were there. That's all I've got." 

Aedan stares wordlessly at her for a long time before turning to face the fire once more, brow creased in thought. Leah shudders and flinches when I move too close. I ease back and give her space, unsure of what to do next. 

"Well then," Aedan says suddenly, "that story is utterly ridiculous, but this is a blight and strange things happen. I advise you to not repeat it to anyone else because you sound insane. However, I just lost my family to betrayal and Alistair narrowly avoided being a Templar against his will so we're all running from something. If anyone asks you're from Highever and your mother was elvan and worked for the Couslands. That'll take care of cursory questions, the rest we'll figure out as we go." 

Leah stiffens "why are you helping?" 

Aedan shrugs, "Alistair likes you, he's my brother now, you're easy on the eyes and I get the impression I'll have to get used to having you around. Pick one." 

"Wow, you're kind of an ass" she says crossly. "But thank you. Despite the unpleasant delivery." 

He turns and fixes her with a hard look which ends in a small grin, which she misses, as she turns away towards me. 

"Can I find somewhere to sleep?" She asks me, and I nod and then frown, my gaze darting to Aedan. Who sighs and stands. 

"This way then" he says, holding out a hand for her. 

"Not sleeping with you" she mutters, making me laugh and then hold up my hands in surrender as she adds "or you" in my direction. 

"I wasn't offering" he replies, "I was going to take you to the Chantry sisters and ask them to find you a bed" 

Leah huffs and stands, ignoring his hand and following him. I tell myself there is no reason to feel smug about her not wanting to take his hand and walking at a much larger distance from him than she had with me. But I do all the same. 

**Leah pov**  
In the game the time between finding the Darkspawn blood and Grey Warden Treaties and the battle itself is quite quick. In reality it's a few days. During that time Alistair and Aedan have duties to attend to but they’ve also found time to show me how to use the daggers Alistair gifted me. Aedan had grumbled over their inferior quality, which had made me bristle and snark that they'd been a gift from Alistair so he should be quiet. Instead he'd smirked at me and baited me until I'd thrown one at him, stepping aside neatly as it passed him and then making me go and collect it. 

"Your aim isn't terrible" he'd said on my return. 

"I find you a motivating target" I'd snapped back. Repressing a shiver at his dark look in reply. 

Alistair was easier to spend time with, stepping me through drills that had me feeling confident and leaving me to practice them on my own... until Aedan pointed out that most ten year old children could do them with more finesse than me. I'd made a quip about his personality being that of a surly ten year old, so I was confident in his expertise on the subject and he'd smirked and shot back with how I was clearly simple and he was just trying to come down to my level of understanding. We were snarling at each other in this way when Alistair appeared again and sighed. 

"Again?" He'd asked tiredly. 

"I don't start it!" I'd replied hotly. 

"And yet you always rise to the occasion" Aedan had replied, looking bored. "If you're here, Alistair, I'll find more useful ways to spend my time" 

"Don't hurry back" I called at his retreating back, snarling at his wave in reply. 

"He's an ass" I snapped to Alistair, "I feel sorry for your order" 

Alistair sighed and turned me back to the training yard, telling me to keep practicing my drills. I refused to look at him after that, partly because I was mad and partly because I didn't want him to see me cry. 

* 

Two days after arriving the battle began. Aedan had been called to the war table with Cailan and Duncan while Alistair stayed back with me. Afterwards as Duncan explained to Alistair that he and Aedan would be lighting the beacon in the tower of Ishal I saw Alistair angry for the first time. Aedan looked bored and disinterested, until his gaze settled on me and he gave me a smug smile. I narrowed my eyes in response, wondering what he had to feel smug about. 

"The girl will need to stay with the mages" Duncan finished saying. 

"Oh like hell, and my name is Leah, not 'the girl'" I snapped, startling slightly at Aedan's bark of laughter. 

"Duncan-" Alistair said. 

"No, Alistair, there isn't time. The battle is starting and you must be ready to light the beacon. Go!" Duncan snapped. Alistair nodded, clasped his mentors hand and moved away without a glance at me. I watched him go with a sense of loss and anger. Duncan moved away as well, without sparing me a glance and I exhaled heavily, scrubbing a hand through my hair, as I stood there completely alone. Uttering a small scream a moment later at a hand on my shoulder. 

"Yes, that fills me with confidence. Come on then, let's go light the pretty beacon so the real warriors can fight." Aedan snarked, pushing me forward. 

"He just left" I said, sounding bereft even to myself. 

Aedan sighed "don't judge him too harshly, he's Templar trained. It's so ingrained in him to follow orders that he can't help it now. He'd have come back right after, I'm sure" 

"Still..." I say, still feeling hurt. 

"I'm not going to coddle you, Leah. Come or don't, it's up to you. But I'm leaving now" 

I nod and follow after him, catching glimpse of his approving smile as we run after Alistair. For the most part my involvement is limited to hanging back and keeping out of the way as we make our way to the tower. Trying not to openly cower in terror at the onslaught of Darkspawn and following instructions barked to me by Aedan as we move through the tower. 

"Leah! The lever!" Aedan shouts, and I slide past them as they fight in close quarters and heave on the lever, opening cages with Mabari in them and turning away as they rip into the Darkspawn. Wishing fervently for the sickening wet sounds to stop. 

"Leah! Healing!" He calls out, and I toss him one of the red vials from my bag, catching Alistair's eye and tossing him the other. 

We make our way up to the final level of the tower and while they navigate a maze of furniture and blockades I dart through a small opening, grab a lit torch off the wall and shove it into the fireplace I know so well from the game. I turn on the spot when one of them, I'm not sure which, screams my name in such a way that I know I'm doomed. There is a moving wall of purple-ish flesh coming towards me and my gaze travels up, up, up to take in the ogre that's charging me. I whimper and step back into the small gap between the fireplace and the window frame, screaming as the ogre hits the wall and bricks and debris fall on me. Coughing as I choke on the dust. I try to move but my foot catches and I twist and fall, smacking my head on something solid. My vision blurs and my breath rasps as I watch Aedan and Alistair fight with the same beautiful, deadly grace they'd had in the Korcari Wilds. Both of them look in my direction more than once and it feels like an eternity before they reach me. Scrabbling through the fallen brickwork to free me means that their backs are to the door we entered through, so I'm the only one to notice more Darkspawn spilling through it. 

"Look" I croak, raising my hand slightly. Aedan turns and curses, shouting at Alistair to leave me. They stand together against the Darkspawn and I have time to think to myself that Flemeth is a lying, sneaky witch before my eyes grow heavy and finally shut.


	4. We never wake up anywhere nice

A sharp jab to my ribs wakes me up quite quickly and I pry one eye open and blink it. Slowly a dark blob comes into focus and I see Morrigan looking at me with an exasperated expression. 

"Are you aware that you drool in your sleep?" She asks. 

"Wassap?" I reply, my tongue stuck to the roof of my mouth, I clear my throat and try again "What's going on?" 

Morrigan sighs, "Mother rescued you. Your friends are outside and have been for some time. You are a heavy sleeper" 

"Its part of my charm" I say as I sit and stretch, "sorry about your pillow" 

She huffs and shoo's me outside. I'm still rubbing sleep from my eyes as I exit their small hut and stumble my way towards where the others are standing. 

"Ladylike as ever" Aedan says dryly as I cover my mouth while I yawn and then grumble about it being early. 

"Leah, you're alright" Alistair says, hurrying towards me and reaching for me. I nod and step back slightly to avoid his touch and give him a tight smile, before ducking my head and moving past him. 

"Ah, so that's how it is" Aedan says quietly as I take up a spot opposite him. 

"I have no idea what you're talking about" I say primly and ignore him in favour of finger-brushing my tangled hair, grimacing when powdery dust rains down out of it. 

"As I was saying" Flemeth says once Alistair has joined us once more, "your army was defeated, and your King is dead. You are the only Grey Wardens left in Ferelden and you'll need to stop this blight." 

"Inspiring" I grumble and then flinch under her cold stare. 

Alistair protests and Aedan looks grim. Flemeth mentions the treaties and bolsters their resolve. She also offers Morrigan. Alistair protests but Aedan agrees, which puts an end to things. We wait as Morrigan packs her things, and I take the time to check my own backpack, particularly the vials it holds. 

"I thought you threw those to us" Alistair says, watching me. 

"No, those ones I borrowed from the Chantry" I reply. 

Alistair's eyes widen and he looks shocked "You stole from the Chantry?" 

"Borrowed, Alistair. I borrowed from the Chantry" I reply, "I'll pay it back one day. It's alright" 

Before he can say anything further, and from the look on his face he wants to say a lot more about it, Morrigan reappears and with stilted farewells we depart her home. Part of me understands that there's no great love between her and Flemeth, but a different, larger and apparently more vocal part of me bristles at the fact that she's not taking this chance to say goodbye. 

"Morrigan, won't you miss her?" I ask as we walk along. 

"Don't make me laugh" she replies darkly. 

"I just... I mean, I wish I'd gotten the chance to say goodbye to my family before I left. I guess it's none of my business but, if I'd had the chance, I'd have taken it. Actually I'd have begged them to let me stay, but that's not the point, the point is you should take this chance to say a proper goodbye" 

Morrigan stares at me as though I'm a particularly unpleasant rodent and takes great pains to ignore me after that. Making me feel miserable in the process. It doesn't help that Alistair hovers and keeps trying to ask me more about my family, I tell him I'm too tired to talk and refuse to feel bad at the kicked-dog look he gives me afterwards. 

Our party travels in this horrible silence all the way to the outskirts of Lothering. I've paused to free a stone trapped in my shoe when I hear a fast approaching rustling in the undergrowth and barely have time to draw breath before a Mabari barrels into me and knocks me flat, driving the air out of me with an "oof" and leaving me rasping and coughing for air. I flip to my stomach and look up at the way the others have gone, seeing them in the middle distance, blissfully unaware of my predicament. I mentally curse them all with horrible genital rashes and sit myself up and gasp in a lungful of air. It burns and makes my eyes water. I'd heard stories of people who were winded saying breathing afterwards was like drinking fire and I can safely say they weren't exaggerating. The first dozen breaths are brutal and after that it's just an ache. When I'm finally feeling slightly less dead I glare balefully at the dog. 

"Are you mad at me? Did you push me over to tell me I'm a bad person?" I ask. 

The Mabari tilts its head to the side and whines. 

"Then why?" I ask. 

It drops down onto its belly, head on front paws, and looks up at me soulfully. I sigh, "oh don't do that, that's not fair. I'm the injured one here!" 

A soft whimper and deep sniff. 

"I'm not falling for this" 

A doggy sigh and tail thump. 

I tilt my head back and scowl at the sky, then stare at the picture of doggy misery before me, "Fine! Fine. But no more pushing me over" 

A woof, a tail thump and suddenly he's on his feet again. 

"I'm a sucker" I grumble. 

A woof. 

"There was really no need to agree" I reply, biting back a smile and brushing myself off as I stand. The others have stopped and are waiting as I approach. 

"Leah, the blight isn't going to wait for us" Aedan snaps, "and what are you doing with that dog?" 

"Recovering from the brutal beating I just took" I sigh, "oh don't do that, I was joking" I say in reply to the sad doggy whine. 

"I think he's chosen you" Alistair says, bending down to scratch the dogs ear, "they do that. Don’t you? Clever boy, yes, yes you are! You picked Leah to be your person. Good for you!" 

Morrigan snorts with disgust "A dog has joined our party and Alistair is still the dumbest member" 

"Hey!" 

"If we're quite finished here?" Aedan snaps, turning on his heel. 

We follow after him in sullen silence. Honestly, it's almost a relief when we get waved down by the thieves on the bridge and asked for a toll. 

"My dog is offering to gnaw on your face" I say conversationally in reply to their demand. 

"My dagger is keen to cut your smart mouth" the toll-requester says, stepping forward. 

"Funny, my shield says 'no thank you'" Alistair replies, stepping in front of me and slamming the shield into the approaching man's face, making him fall back. 

Morrigan raises a hand and sparks of lightning shoot from her finger tips and engulf the man, making him scream. The smell of burnt hair fills the air and for a moment I'm worried he's dead, but as soon as she lowers her hand the sparks stop and he stands, looking singed. 

"Right, well, obviously the toll doesn't apply to everyone." He says hurriedly. 

"You're done here. Move along" Aedan replies coldly, and watches as they pack up their belongings and disappear back up the road. 

"That won't keep them gone long" Alistair says grimly. 

Aedan sighs and pinches the bridge of his nose, "Yes, I'm aware of that. But I can't stop a Blight and keep the local town free from enterprising thieves. We'll report them to the chantry, surely they have Templars there for this sort of thing." 

We enter the town and pick our way through the refugee camp that's setup on what was once a green field

*  
The town of Lothering was clearly very pretty and quaint at one point in recent history. Cute little buildings and a large Chantry comprise most of the town. Wide streets that were once neat and tidy and from the looks of it, dotted with gardens in several places, are now overrun with tired looking refugees and dusty boarded up windows. The green field where the majority of tents are is churned up and coated with dust. The air is dusty, the people are dusty, the entire place needs a rinse off and coat of paint. It makes me sad. Worse still are the wide-eyed children that skirt around us as we walk, their clothes dusty and torn, occasionally crying out for mothers or siblings or food. I rummage in my backpack for something to give and find only my clothes and two health potions. I must make a noise because I look up to see Alistair giving me a sad look and shake of his head and I feel my shoulders slump. 

We stop at the Chantry and Aedan talks to their Templars about the thieves we chased off. A moment later he accepts a reward from them and then casts an eye at the Chanters board, plucking off a few of the items and leading us on. As we're leaving a tall armoured Knight steps back and straight into me. I grumble and step back to let him pass, he casts me a curious look but makes no attempt to apologise and for some reason that's what makes me snap. 

"No you're quite right, clearly I should be apologising to you for the way you nearly stepped on me. I'm sorry you're a fathead" I snark, bristling. 

Alistair turns and his gaze falls on the Knight and he startles "Ser Donall?" 

The Knight gives him a quizzical look and then smiles, "Alistair. How very good to see you" 

"Yeah Alistair, great to see you. Excuse me." I growl and push past them. I hear Alistair apologise for my manners and Donall laugh in reply. This does wonders for my mood and by the time I'm outside I'm radiating fury. Aedan eyes me warily as I approach. 

"Where's Alistair?" He asks. 

"Great to see you too, no I'm fine, totally fine, please don't fret. Also Alistair is dead, boohoo lets go" I snip as I continue to walk past him. 

"Well the intelligence level of the party will increase as a result now that he's not dragging it down" Morrigan says, falling into step beside me and looks mildly surprised when I snicker. 

"Does this mean Aedan will have to fill in for the part of 'Warden staring at his navel'?" I ask, unable to hide my growing amusement. 

A small laugh tinkles from Morrigan's lips and she eyes me with renewed interest "Tis a vital role to be played, are we sure he can fill the part?" 

"The most challenging part for him will be not speaking. The man loves the sound of his own voice" I reply. Morrigan looks at me for a long moment and then smiles. 

"There may be something likeable about you yet" she says lightly. 

"If you wore more clothes and looked less bitter, I'm sure I'd say the same in return" I reply with equal lightness. Her shocked laugh surprises a laugh out of me in return and we share a friendly glance. 

"Great, they're making friends and teaming up against me. This will be a fabulous time in my life and I'll remember it fondly always, I just know it" Aedan sighs, "come on then, before someone makes me tidy up the body you've left" 

I start to laugh under my breath only to grunt in surprise when a moment later when another armoured body steps out and nearly squashes me. This time my squeak of protest does not go unnoticed and a tall man with coppery hair and grey eyes turns quickly and catches my arm and steadies me. 

"My apologies, I was not paying attention. Are you alright?" He says. 

I can't help the sunny smile I give him, which makes him smile uncertainly at me in return "I'm-" 

"Rory? Maker's Breath, it is you. I can't believe it" Aedan looks wide eyed and hopeful. Rory stares at him for a long moment before clasping hands with Aedan in a sort of half handshake half hug gesture. The two of them keep their heads close and talk quickly. Aedan visibly sags and I catch a look of utter helplessness on his face before he closes his eyes tightly and nods. 

"Well, I'm glad to see you. I'd given you up for dead" 

Rory grimaces and shakes his head "no, I got lucky and escaped. I'm sorry that I couldn't-" 

Aedan silences him with a wave of his hand "please, I understand. I'm truly glad you survived. I need your skills more than ever now" and gives him a rundown on the state of the blight and the wardens. 

"Loghain betrayed the King?" Rory said "and Howe betrayed your father. These cannot be coincidence, Aedan." 

Aedan looked grim and shook his head "no, I don't think so either. Come on, I need a drink" 

They walk on and Morrigan and I follow after. We're well into the town proper, heading for the tavern for news and food, when Alistair finds us. Looking put out about having been left behind. 

"You're looking remarkably well for a dead man" Aedan says as he approaches, giving me an unimpressed look. 

"Training blades" I say glumly, tapping the daggers at my waist. 

"We need to practice more, if you can't kill Alistair there's no hope for you against someone capable" Aedan replies 

"Hey!" Alistair cries, "I haven't done anything" 

"And that's the problem, isn't it?" Morrigan says smoothly as we continue on "by the way how is your navel? You seem to find it fascinating." 

"Right, so is this the part where I'm astonished to find out you've never been sad in your life?" Alistair snaps back. 

"Oh Alistair, you make me sad every minute that I spend with you" she says, "which is why I'm going on ahead" 

Alistair mutters under his breath at her departing back and I chuckle softly. He gives me a hard look "You were rude to Ser Donall" 

"No, Ser Donall nearly squashed me and then looked at me like I was a bug." 

"That doesn't mean you can insult him, Leah!" 

I groan and wave my hand dismissively "Go away, Alistair, I'm not in the mood to listen to you if you're going to lecture me my manners when someone else was rude to me first." 

"Leah, you can't speak to people like that. I'm not always going to be there to help you and-" 

"Oh do shut up, Alistair!" I snap, glaring at him and then storming off after Morrigan. 

"They really don't teach you Chantry boys the first thing about women, do they?" Aedan says to him as I'm walking away, sounding very amused. Alistair's sigh sounds defeated and angry and I feel a sharp prick of guilt, which I squash down and ignore. 

Morrigan and I enter the tavern without incident and move further in, I catch her eye and point towards an empty table and she nods her head in agreement. We're halfway to it when the door opens again and Aedan, Rory and Alistair walk through, within a few steps someone shouts out about Grey Wardens and a group of soldiers push past to get to them. An argument about Loghain and treachery is started and then one of the soldiers draws a blade. I grin and draw my dagger, stepping up behind him to place it very firmly at the base of his spine. 

"Hello there, I'm Leah. Those are my Grey Wardens and if anyone's going to injure them, it'll be me. Trust me, I've earned the right. Now, be a good little messenger boy and run along before I sever your spinal cord and leave you without the use of your legs for the rest of your life. 'kay?" 

There's a moment of complete silence while my words sink in and then the man I'm threatening turns around too fast for me to react and snatches my dagger from me. I have just enough time to see Aedan roll his eyes in complete exasperation before I sidestep left and narrowly avoid being skewered by my own damn dagger. A crackle of energy shoots past my ear and hits the man, making him fall to the ground and writhe in agony. 

Just before things get any more interesting a Chantry sister steps in and breaks up the fight. Handing me back my dagger with a small smile. I take it sheepishly and murmur my thanks. She follows us outside and away from the town. 

"Hello there, my name is Leah" Aedan mimics me as we walk "I'm an idiot with a dagger who doesn't listen to what the people I train with tell me, please, take it off me. Oh you have, wonderful." 

"It wasn't that bad" I grumble. 

"You were nearly stabbed with your own dagger. The only thing that would be more pathetic is if you fell on it, which really wouldn't surprise me at this point" he snaps back. Beside him Rory snort-coughs and clears his throat. 

I can feel my face heat in anger and mortification as we continue walking. "I was trying to help!" 

"By making them laugh to death?" 

"What was I supposed to do?" I snap 

Aedan sighs and scrubs a hand through his hair. He glares at me, "Don't talk about what you're going to do, Leah, next time just stab the bastard. It's you or him, and at least you're on our side." 

I sigh and keep walking, silent as we pass the cage with the Qunari in it. Pausing only because Morrigan does, her gaze assessing. Leliana explains that he killed a family and Morrigan appears to not care. She tells Aedan we should free him and Aedan disagrees. Changing his mind only when Sten agrees to assist us. 

"He killed a family!" I protest. 

"Well at least he can fight. Right now aside from myself and Rory I have an apostate, a sad Warden, a chantry sister and you. Honestly, I could use someone else with skill right now." 

"Just because I'm sad doesn't mean I'm not skilled" Alistair snaps. 

"Say that word one more time" Morrigan sneers, her fingers dancing with lightning. 

I arch a brow at Aedan "oh dear, now who's causing trouble?" 

He sighs. We release Sten, complete the chanters board requests, buy supplies with the reward money and leave Lothering, putting in a few hours of distance between us and it by nightfall. We're setting up for the evening, Alistair and Aedan discussing the merits of travelling to Redcliffe to see Arl Eamon with Rory when a merchant on a cart joins us. Bodahn and Sandal, I think to myself and smile. 

Once the merchant has joined us and we're settled by the fire and eating I find myself observing my new companions. It's like living a gamers dream being among them, although I was surprised that Rory joined us. I'd always fancied Ser Gilmore when I'd played through as a human noble and had wondered if he and Elissa would have had any romantic interest in each other. Possibly not. He looks older than Aedan, mid-twenties at least and it's clear that Aedan respects him and listens to him. Weighing Rory's opinions against his own and often favouring them over Alistair's. I feel a spark of anger at the way they discount Alistair's opinions so easily. He might be younger than them, but he's been a warden longer and is a Templar trained swordsman. It irritates me to see him let them treat him that way and I huff audibly the next time I hear them disagree with him. 

"Something to say, Leah?" Aedan asks 

"Let's hope not, you'd just ignore it in favour of your own opinion I'm sure" I snap 

Aedan sighs and casts a long-suffering look at Rory, who gives him an indecipherable look back. It makes me furious and I snort "honestly you two, get a room" 

Rory looks puzzled and Aedan arches a brow at me. Alistair sighs and stands, scooping the last of the stew we'd eaten into his bowl and calling out for Barkspawn, our foundling mabari, to come and eat. 

"C'mon Leah, he'll prefer it if you feed him" Alistair says quietly and I stand and join him as we walk away a little. 

"They're ignoring you" I say crossly 

"It doesn't matter" he replies, kneeling down to scratch Barkspawns ear. 

"It does" I huff, feeling like a small child but unable to shake off my frustrations. 

Alistair looks up at me and smiles ever so slightly, his dark eyes warm with emotion "it bothers you?" 

"Yes. How could it not? You're the real warden here, Alistair. Aedan's just a sulking noble with anger issues" 

Alistair's smile is small and boyish and I huff and roll my eyes before smiling back at him "Look, I'm not saying you're perfect, I just don't like to see you ignored. You're too nice." 

"And you like me" he says smugly. 

"More than Aedan, the grumpy noble boy with anger issues and a lack of any redeeming qualities whatsoever - and his sidekick who nearly stepped on me, yes" I say. 

"He nearly stepped on you?" 

"Apparently I'm easily missed" I grumble. 

"It's because you're so short" he says. 

"Thanks Alistair, I hadn't noticed my lack of height. Good of you to point it out." I grump. 

He grins and is about to say something when instead he yelps and shakes out his hand. "Hey, you bit me" Alistair says, shocked. Barkspawn whines and Alistair sighs "I suppose I had that coming. Come on then. If we're all finished eating its probably time to sleep. I'll sort out watches with Aedan." 

"I can help" I say quietly. 

"When you're using those daggers better, yes. Until then, no" he replies. 

"See, you're much more alluring when you're decisive" I tease, grinning as we walk back towards the fire. 

"Are you always like this?" Alistair asks, looking embarrassed and exasperated all at once. 

I throw him a questioning look and he shakes his head, muttering for me to never mind. I call out a halfhearted goodnight to the others before crawling into my cramped tent and lumpy bedroll, my eyes closing as soon as my head hits my makeshift pillow.


	5. Doesn’t everyone go to Redcliffe first?

The journey to Redcliffe is slow going and mostly uphill. The one thing I will say is that the Hinterlands are beautiful. Words like lush and green and verdant come to mind when I look at it. But also phrases like 'tangled undergrowth' and 'dear god another bear, do they breed them for fun here' and 'if I trip on one more grassy divot in I'll scream' - so it's a mixed bag. 

I'm grateful when we stop by a stream the second night and setup camp early. I race through my tasks, grab a cake of soap and scratchy towel I've purchased from Bodahn and head for the stream, walking upstream until I find a shady and secluded spot. I spread my towel out in a patch of sun and shed my outer layer of clothes, scrubbing at tunic and trousers with soap and rinsing them in water before hanging them over a low hanging branch to dry and wading into the water wearing only my underwear and camisole. 

The water is cold and so I take a deep breath and dunk myself under to get the whole 'it's too cold' part over and done with, and then scrub vigorously at my skin and hair with the soap before tossing it back towards the rest of my possessions and just floating for a bit. I spend some time investigating the patch of stream I've claimed for the moment, just messing around and enjoying not being shouted at. I swim upstream a little and then float to let the current take me back to my original spot, laughing at myself when I lose my footing and get dunked. It's a nice way to waste time and I only leave the water when my fingers are wrinkled. I grab my sun warmed towel and dry off, scuffling at my hair to get it to stop dripping before wrapping it around me and tucking it in so it covers me from chest to the top of my thigh. I've turned to check on my clothes when the sound of a throat clearing makes me freeze and turn slowly. A slim, blonde elvan man steps away from a tree and smiles at me, his gaze travelling leisurely over me as he moves closer. 

"Ah, hello?" I say hesitantly. 

"Hello" he replies, still smiling, still approaching as though he has not a care in the world – which throws me off completely. 

"Do I know you?" I ask, arms wrapping around me to hold my towel more securely. 

"No" he replies and starts to circle me. I turn to keep him in front of me and huff when my feet catch on a tree root. 

"Okay, well, I have to go" I say, frowning slightly and collecting my clothes from the branch. 

"Hmm" he replies, still circling, still smiling and still perfectly at ease. It's beginning to weird me out quite a lot now, so I nod and step away, he stops and makes no move to follow me. I take another step back from him and another, then turn and hurry away. Crying out in surprise when an arm bands around my waist and draws me back against a warm chest. 

"I think you should stay" he says, his voice sounding warm and amused. 

"My friends will be wondering where I am" I say, trying to wriggle free and growing increasingly worried at how little budge there is in his arm. 

"Ah, well, luckily I'm here for your friends too. Let us go and see them, you lead the way, I'll enjoy the view from back here" he waits for a long moment and then nudges me forward. 

I sigh miserably and walk towards the camp, opening my mouth to call out and cutting off with a strangled yelp when a dagger – not my own, thankfully – presses featherlight against my throat. 

"It would be a terrible shame to mar such a slender throat with this blade, but if you yell, I'll do it" 

I swallow and keep walking, feeling utterly miserable and useless as I enter the camp and see my friends setting up and preparing to cook. Leliana notices us first and gasps, making Aedan look up and scowl. 

"Imagine if you'd practiced that take down move I insisted on, Leah" he snaps as he stands. 

"Sorry, Aedan" I call back and suck in a breath as the blade presses closer. 

"Tsk, tsk, bella. I said no talking" 

"I'm very forgetful" I mutter and flinch as his arm around my waist tightens. I'm confused because he also chuckles darkly and for some reason I find it incredibly appealing, I sternly tell myself that this is by no means an appealing or enticing situation and that I should be concentrating on breaking free and not on the warm hand resting on my hip or the warm chest pressed up against my back. But my brain waves away such practical advice and lets my body lean back into him slightly. He notices and huffs a laugh. 

"Forse più tardi" (maybe later) he says, and I blush furiously, which makes him chuckle. Then he calls out to Aedan about releasing me for a price. Aedan calls back that I'm nothing but trouble and that he's welcome to me. I wince and suck in a breath at his words. It's a testament to how pathetic I am that my attacker winces as well and breathes a sigh over my bare shoulders, "the man is a fool, bella. Perhaps I should save you from him" 

I huff a laugh and my throat nicks on the blade, causing a trickle of blood to slide down my throat and me to gasp and step back. My attacker soothes me with a stream of words in Italian and brushes his thumb over my waist, arm still gripping me firmly. I hear Aedan curse and Alistair call something out, but I'm not really listening, too caught up in my own misery. 

"What do you want?" I ask quietly. 

He sighs, "many things, bella" 

"Which of them are needed to let me go?" 

"You truly wish to leave me for that idiota sciocco?" (stupid idiot) He asks, gesturing with the dagger towards the group of people I'm travelling with. Aedan and Alistair arguing while Leliana looks fearfully at me and Sten watches impassively. 

"Non ho altro posto dove andare" (I have nowhere else to go) I say sadly. 

He tsks again and his hand at my waist moves again to caress my side, "and she speaks my tongue." 

"mia madre era italiana, mi ha fatto imparare" (My mother was Italian, she made me learn) I reply. 

"Italian? No, bella, stiamo parlando Antivan" (No beautiful we are speaking Antivan). 

I turn my head to him sharply and cry out in pain as my skin splits under the dagger again. He starts to speak and then grunts in pain and drops like a stone behind me. I step quickly away and turn to see him writhing on the ground while sparks of lightning crawl over him. 

"Thank you, Morrigan!" I call out, hand rising to my throat and gingerly assessing the damage. 

"You are most welcome" she says, emerging from the shadows that were behind me a moment ago. 

I wait for the sparks to stop before kneeling down next to my attacker. He looks very singed and his hair is a mess. 

"I'm Leah, e tu sei?" (and you are?) 

"Would you believe me if I said 'alla tua mercé e disposto a servirti'?" (at your mercy and willing to serve you) He asks, looking me over. 

"No, not really. Besides, what name would I call out while in the throes of passion?" 

He chuckles and rolls to his side, cradling his head in his hand and looking like he's just lounging here on the ground for the fun of it. "Apologies, bella, I was so distracted that I forgot my manners. I am Zevran. Zev to my friends" 

"And to your lovers?" I ask, quirking a brow. 

His voice drops to a seductive purr, "Well they mainly just scream my praises" 

I laugh and sit back on my heels "of course. Silly question really" 

He grins and I shake my head, frowning slightly when his gaze darkens a moment before a hand clamps down on my shoulder and grips tight enough to make me gasp. Another grabs my opposite arm and I'm hauled to my feet and turned to face an angry Aedan, with an equally angry Alistair beside him. 

"Why are you always the source of trouble we encounter?" Aedan shouts, face reddening all the way up to his hairline. "Do you have no sense of self-preservation at all? And where are your clothes?" 

"For your information I was swimming, you should try it sometime because you stink. My clothes are back by the stream – if you'd get your grubby paws off me I could go and get them" I snap. 

He releases me as though burnt and pinches the bridge of his nose, "fine, go. Try not to get attacked this time" he sighs and then turns, calling for Rory to keep an eye on me. 

I mutter under my breath as I turn and then curse loudly when a hand grips my ankle and makes me stumble, I throw Zevran a dirty look and he leers at me. "torna presto da me, bella" (come back to me soon, beautiful) he says with a wink. Then grunts and scowls at Aedan, who has crouched beside him and begun to knot a rope around one of his ankles. 

I pick myself up, brush myself off and return to my swimming spot with Rory walking silently beside me. Waiting while I spend a moment Washing the dirt and blood from myself and hastily dressing. At least my clothes are dry and warm, that's the only bright spot I can see as I trudge back to camp. They've trussed Zevran up like a chicken by the time I return and I shoot him a pained look which he meets blandly. 

"Is that really necessary?" I ask, waving a hand towards Zevran. 

"Yes" Aedan snaps, "unless you'd like to see if he's going to actually kill you next time" 

"And deprive me of your presence? Ugh, agony" I deadpan and continue on to my tent, hiding in it until dinner time. 

Our meals are nothing fancy, this one is slightly better because we still have supplies from Redcliffe castle, but it's still just a watery stew with dried meat and some root vegetables dug up from our surrounds. Still I'm surprised and a bit upset when Aedan and Alistair divvy up the last of it amongst themselves, leaving an empty pot. I consider calling them out on their awful behaviour, but drop it, the less I have to talk to them right now the better. I'm grumbling to myself about reality sucking and games being far more fun, exciting and enjoyable as I approach Zevran. 

"Can I interest you in some truly dreadful, very bland, but non-lethal watery stew?" I ask, proffering a spoon. 

He eyes me closely and then slowly raises his bound hands, quirking his brow at me as if to say 'are you kidding?', and I shrug and sit down next to him, offering up a spoonful of stew. "Well at least I know you won't grope me this time" 

He grins and locks gazes with me, making a show of licking his lips and opening his mouth for the spoon. Sucking the spoon until the very end as he releases it. 

"Very seductive" I deadpan, "my panties are soaked through right now, really" 

He glares at me for a moment and then his lips twitch and a laugh erupts from him, as though he'd been trying to hold it back. I smirk and shake my head. 

"I will have to try harder" he says, watching me closely as I dip the spoon into the bowl once more. 

"I'm a hard sell. Unless you've got access to a hot bubble bath and fluffy towels, in which case I'm yours" I say, offering the spoon up again. 

He chuckles "Alas, I do not" 

"Too bad, it could have been beautiful" I reply. I can hear Alistair grumbling about my actions to Aedan and feel myself tense, my eyes close and my pained expression must be very evident. 

"Ah, we are making your lovers jealous" he teases. 

"I'd sooner sleep with the dog than them. Smells better. Has nicer manners. Pushes me around less." I frown. 

I see the shadow before the person and sigh, "Yes?" 

To my surprise it's Alistair that's standing there, "Leah, you need to come away. He could hurt you." 

"He's just eating, Alistair. You've got him trussed up, it's fine." 

"Do not worry, any cries she uttered at my touch would only be of pleasure" Zevran says, leering openly at me and chuckling darkly when Alistair flushes and reaches for me. 

"You and Aedan need to stop grabbing me!" I say hotly, making him flush a deeper shade of red. 

"Leah, I was just worried" he says, sounding hurt. I find myself yet again having to squash down the need to give in and apologise for hurting his feelings. 

"Mm, you know, I wouldn't object to you grabbing me. You wouldn't be the first warrior I've... taken down" Zevran interjects, his gaze hot as it travels Alistairs face and drops down his body. He adds in a little moan as he looks pointedly at Alistairs groin. I bite my lip and try desperately hard to stifle the laughter that's trying to escape me, making a hiccupping noise instead and sending myself into a coughing fit. Alistair glares at me and I laugh for real. 

"I'm sorry, I am, but... the look on your face! Did the tied-up man scare you, or was that you being interested?" I tease. 

"It's the rope" Zevran says in mock conspiratorial tones, leaning in towards me "warriors always love the rope" 

I'm still giggling as Alistair sighs, grips my arm and helps me to stand and leads me away. 

"Sometimes I wonder why I like you" he says softly. 

"That's funny, sometimes I wonder why you dislike me so very much" I reply, shaking myself free and disappearing into my tent. 

When I wake in the morning there is a coil of rope beside me and a note that says, "for later". I smile and huff a silent laugh, choosing not to mention either item to the rest of the party as we pack up and move on.


	6. The cliffs here look more brown than red

When we finally see Redcliffe it’s a relief. After yet another long day of walking, and in my case frequently tripping on things, in the Hinterlands it’s nice to see some civilisation. I entertain thoughts of fluffy beds, hot food that is more interesting than ‘bits of veggies and something we caught in a snare floating in hot water’ and a door that I can shut and hide behind. Instead we’re greeted by a member of the militia who wants to make sure we speak to Bann Teagan. I wait for Aedan and Alistair to step aside, certain that this is where Alistair will reveal he’s really a bastard prince, but it doesn’t happen and instead we follow after Tomas into the town itself.

We enter the Chantry and the drop in temperature from outside is enough to make me shiver violently enough to catch Morrigan’s attention, she quirks a brow at me and I shrug. Alistair approaches a man who I can only assume is Bann Teagan and they fall into conversation. Aedan produces the treaties and looks genuinely annoyed when Teagan tells him that Redcliffe needs to come first, he has a rich-kid moment of ‘surely you must have more Knights’ and then looks chastised when he’s told the Arl is sick and the Knights are searching for a cure. I’m a petty enough person that I enjoy his discomfort and permit myself a small smirk which follows me all the way back outside and falls only when Aedan glares at me.

“Right,” Aedan says tersely, “it seems we’re to help this merry band of misfits defend their town because their Knights are off on a wild goose chase.” 

“Aedan, that comment does you no credit” Leliana admonishes, her pretty face creased into a frown. Aedan stiffens and gives her a hard look, softening slightly when she returns it.

“It’s not that I don’t care, Leliana, it’s that I’m focused on saving Ferelden as a whole. If the Arlessa wanted to look for magic dust to cure her husband she could have hired a mercenary group and not left her people undefended.” Aedan snaps, then pinches the bridge of his nose, “this is wasting time.”

“I’ll speak with the Knights” Rory says, clapping Aedan on the shoulder, “see what I can do to help them”

“Alright. Leliana, why don’t you see if you can charm the damn Blacksmith out of his tantrum. Alistair, scout around the village and see if you can pick up some able-bodied fighters for us. I’ll talk to the mayor. The rest of you, try to stay out of trouble. That means you, Leah.” He gives me a hard look.

I snort and shake my head, moving to Alistair and bumping his side gently with my shoulder by way of greeting. Alistair huffs a laugh and shakes his head at me “come on then, lets check out the town.”

We make our way towards the water, stopping into Kaitlyn’s house to coax her brother, Bevin, from the cupboard along the way. Alistair admires the blade that Bevin hands over and looks sideways at me. 

“If I didn’t know better, I’d say you knew that boy was there”

“Alistair, saying things like that makes you sound crazy” I say dismissively.

“This coming from the girl who thinks she’s from somewhere far, far away…” he trails off and gives me a pointed look.

I huff and shake my head, “low blow, Alistair. I – oh, hooray, Aedan is here.”

“I’m just as thrilled to be joining you” Aedan deadpans, “apparently there’s a dwarf here that we want on our side. Name of Dwyn. Murdoch asked that we talk to him”

I try reaching for the sword we’ve been given but Aedan intercepts me and shakes his head, “I think we’ll keep you on your training daggers for a while yet.” Pointedly ignoring my muttered response as we continue on through the village.

The boarded path we take curves gently and as we round the corner we come to the house Aedan had been looking for. He knocks and a muffled ‘go away’ is the response. After a solid minute of cursing and intimidation, which is hard to do through a locked door, we hear the sound of a key turning and the door opens. Dwyn and Aedan hash out an agreement while I openly stare into the tiny house, biting down hard on my lip to stop from laughing. Alistair gives me a funny look and his face creases up in question at my sudden outburst. I try desperately to swallow down my mirth, but just can’t, so in the end I spill. “oh come on you're not seeing this? Two big burly guards, one stocky dwarf and only one double bed? I mean do they share? Take it in shifts? What?” 

Beside me, Aedan gives an exasperated sigh and snaps at me “Leah! Do you ever take anything seriously?”

I raise my hands in mock surrender, still chuckling, “I'm deadly serious about my curiosity on this one. Maybe they play sandwiches.” 

Alistair, bless his innocent heart, looks openly puzzled. “Do I want to ask? No. Am I going to ask? Yes. What do you mean by playing sandwiches?” 

Aedan growls out a terse “Don't answer, I know I don't want to know.” In response, already turning away and heading back to the village centre. 

I pitch my voice low, as though sharing a secret with Alistair alone, even though I know Aedan will still be able to hear. “Well… The two big burly men are the bread and the dwarf is-“ 

Aedan turns sharply on his heel and claps a hand over my mouth. “Don't say it. Let me pretend you're not here and I did certainly not hear that.” 

Alistair frowns at him and reaches out for me while talking, “If they're the bread then he would be the filling but that's not going to work because...oh. Oh! Leah!!”

I cackle remorselessly, despite Aedan’s hand and Alistair’s look of shock. So much so that my eyes tear up a bit. It’s not really that the situation is that funny, it just feels like forever since I had something stupid to really chuckle over and despite my laughter being tinged with a bit of crazy it feels good to do.

Aedan hauls me along to the tavern and glares at me until I take a seat at the bar. “Don’t. Move. Don’t speak. Restrict your breathing as well” he mutters and then stalks away to accost the patrons. I turn on my seat and give Lloyd, the bartender, a dazzling smile. He gives me an unimpressed once over in return.

“Hey handsome, don’t suppose a girl can get a drink here?”

“For coin she can” he replies dryly.

“And if I don’t have any coin?” I ask coyly.

“Then you’re going to go thirsty” he replies, dragging a dirty rag over an even dirty mug. I sigh and slump a bit in my seat.

Lloyd seems to take pity on me “or you could work” he says.

I give him a flirty smile and a wink “well why didn’t you say so?” 

I snatch up two tankards he’s filled and start delivering them around the bar. I know that ale, and getting it for free, is something that aids the moral of the militia, so I’m liberal with my deliveries of ale and terrible with the collection of coin. By the time Lloyd realises it’s too late and he scowls at me and fires me. I take my last two tankards over to Aedan and Alistair.

“Maybe you’ll both be more handsome after you drink this” I say, depositing the drinks in front of them.

“I think you’ll find it’s the other way around” Aedan says dryly, taking a sip and grimacing “nice work by the way”

I make a show of looking astonished and place a hand against Aedan’s forehead as though trying to gauge his temperature “Aedan Cousland, did you just compliment me? Did it hurt? Are you in pain now?”

Aedan snorts “I just said I’d need alcohol for you to look attractive, Leah.”

“Yeah, but then you said nice work, so I’m willing to forgive your lies” 

He shakes his head and ignores me, beside him Alistair sighs.

“What?” I ask defensively, “Alistair, I’m being nice to him. It’s not my fault he’s constantly miserable. Everyone else I brought ale to is smiling.”

“That’s because you flirted with them” Alistair replies quietly.

“Oh Alistair, they’re all just practice. It’s you I want” I say, leaning forward with my chin in my hand and staring at him openly until he blushes.

“Leah” Aedan says warningly.

“Shh, Aedan, you’re not drunk enough to be pretty yet” I say, gaze never leaving Alistair.

“Right. That’s it, you’re staying in the Chantry. Maybe we’ll get lucky and a pious Mother will preach you into being easier to live with” Aedan says, standing and tugging on my arm and marching me outside.

“You really need to stop pushing me around” I say through clenched teeth.

“And you really need to stop making the only other Warden in Ferelden a blushing mess. Grow up, Leah” Aedan says sternly, hand remaining on my shoulder as he walks me through the town and to the Chantry, waiting as I open the door and continuing in with me until we’re standing in front of Bann Teagan.

“Bann Teagan, this is Leah. She…” he sighs, “is important to Alistair. Can we keep her here?”

Teagan looks surprised but quickly hides it “of course, many of the village non-combatants are sheltering in the Chantry. You’d be very welcome to join them, my lady” he gives me a kind smile.

“Try not to wear that welcome out too soon” Aedan mutters to me, then speaks up so that Teagan can hear. “Thank you, Bann Teagan.”

“No need to be so formal. You’re Bryce’s youngest, aren’t you? I think we met at one of your mother’s parties a few years back. She was very keen on me getting to know your sister, Elissa” Teagan says, a smile playing around his lips. I feel Aedan stiffen behind me and for a moment his grip is painful on my shoulder.

“Yes” he rasps, “Lis had seen you in Denerim while visiting and asked for the introduction.”

Teagan nods, “I remember now. How is your sister? Your family?”

I wince at the question and my hand reaches up to rest on Aedan’s, still gripping my shoulder tightly, and give it a gentle squeeze. The movement seems to startle Aedan and he draws in a sharp breath, catching my hand in his and holding it a moment before turning me.

“Dead” he says quietly, but the word seems to echo in the vast room. He looks over my shoulder to Teagan, his face stone, “Howe waited until my father’s men and my brother had left for Ostagar and then laid siege to our home. Killed my family. Forgive me, but if you want my help in preventing your own family’s death you must excuse me. Leah, behave.”

Before anyone can move or speak Aedan turns and stalks out of the Chantry, the heavy door closing behind him sounding unnaturally loud, many of the lit candles in the room flickering in the draft. I can’t help but shiver as the cool air once again steals warmth from me. Behind me, Teagan exhales heavily. I glance at him over my shoulder and give him a sad smile which he returns before turning his attention back to preparations with the Chantry Mother he’d been talking to. I shake my hands out at my side, feeling a bit useless, and slowly make my way around the room. I’m struck by the beauty of the building, the coloured glass mosaics of the windows which don’t depict religious images like in churches back home, but instead just add colour to the room. The shelves and shelves of books, the pews which are sturdy but still show fine craftsmanship with intricate details carved into them. Its obvious that this Chantry is well funded. A cynical part of me snidely comments that I’m yet to see a poor church anywhere, but it’s a petty thought that I quickly squash. I take a seat on a nearby bench, rest my back against the wall and wait.

**Alistair pov**  
By the time we’ve finished organising Dwyn, getting ale to the Militia, coercing the Blacksmith into letting us in, rolling barrels of oil up the hill and splitting them open to soak the ground, herding the last of the town into either Milita groups or into the Chantry, it’s late and I’m tired. I also miss Leah. I consider checking in with Aedan and Rory but they’re in the midst of a discussion with Ser Perth and other Redcliffe Knights, some of whom I can remember from my time here as a child and would like to avoid. They’re not fond memories. Instead I slip into the welcome coolness of the Chantry and wait for my eyes to adjust to the dim interior. 

It takes a moment, but I eventually find Leah tucked into a corner of the room with a handful of children. She’s got a collection of paper in front of her, bent into shapes and she looks a bit flustered. The children that are with her look entertained. As I move closer I can hear her a lot more clearly and I struggle to bite back a laugh.

“And this is, oh, lopsided bear. Well, he can sit along one-legged frog and headless chicken. Maker, I'm bad at this” Leah says dejectedly, her cheeks colouring slightly.

I can’t resist teasing her, “is this a gathering of the slightly damaged animals?” 

Leah, as always, is quick to rise to the occasion. “Why yes, Alistair, it is, and you're the last to arrive. Now that you're here we can start the monthly meeting. Shall we go over the notes from last time?” 

“Hey!” I say, half hurt and half laughing.

“Hey yourself. Don’t mock my wonky paper animals and then expect a warm welcome” she huffs, looking sadly at the collection before her.

I swallow down my amusement and catch her eye, “I came to check if you're alright.” 

Leah relaxes a little and winks at me, “I am... at least now you're here. Are you?” 

I groan and rub a hand over the back of my neck “You're doing it again” 

Leah looks up at me, all grey eyes and innocence “What?” 

“The flirting after being mean. Why do I find it so appealing?” 

Her grin is dazzling, “because you're a complex man, Alistair.” 

“I can never tell if you're being serious or not” I say, hearing the whine in my voice and hating it. 

Leah’s eyes flash, “I seriously love your hair.”

“I'm going back out to face the undead. It's safer out there” turning on my heel and heading for the Chantry doors. A small chuckle escaping me when I hear Leah shout “bring me back something nice!”


	7. You know we’d move a lot quicker with horses

Unsurprisingly Aedan and Alistair chose not to take up the Arlessa on the offer of her blood to save her demon possessed child, and so shortly after the battle with the undead, and crawling through the Redcliffe castle to find aforementioned demon possessed child and cartwheeling Teagan, we head off to visit the Mages. I for one am glad to be leaving, mainly because the Arlessa is not my favourite person and I’m sporting a hand mark on my face where she slapped me. The reason for the slap? Well, it’s complicated. I maintain I was standing up for Alistair against a bitchy Arlessa who was talking over him, down to him and ignoring him yet somehow still managing to make snotty remarks about him (I won’t say that woman isn’t talented). Aedan feels I’m just a walking disaster and Leliana tells me I need to learn how to be tactful. To be fair, she probably has a point.

“Are you alright?” Alistair asks quietly that night in camp.

“Living the dream, Alistair. You?” I snap back.

He sighs and scrubs a hand through his hair, giving me a sorrowful look. “I appreciate what you did back there. I mean, you really shouldn’t have, but… thank you.”

I can feel anger and terse words build up inside of me and squash them down hard. “Alistair” I say gently, “she doesn’t get to speak to you like that. You’re a Warden. You’re going out of your way to save her demon-possessed, snot-nosed kid. I’m only angry that you didn’t tell her to shut up yourself”

He bristles and then exhales heavily, “it wouldn’t be right”

“Oh but insulting you, that’s fine”

“Leah”

“Alistair it’s your damn honour at stake here, do what you want with it. I’m just an idiot with a big mouth clearly. And I’m still not sorry, so don’t expect me to apologise. I’ll wait outside the town gates when we return. I’d die before apologising to that bitter old bitch”

“Leah!” he says, aghast, “you can’t say things like that, if the wrong people were to hear-“

“Go away, Alistair. If you’re going to be pious do it elsewhere. Maybe you’ll find a spine on the way.”

He sighs heavily and stands, storming off to the other side of the campfire. I lean back on my hands and look up into the clear night sky, marvelling at the sheer amount of stars that are so clearly visable. Wondering if any of them are home. If Katelyn is under them as well somewhere. I hope she’s safe, if she is. I hope she’s happier than I am right now. God, I miss her. I’d give a lot, anything really, to have my calm, steady best friend here with me now. Someone on my side. Plus, there’s a part of me that thinks she and Aedan would be perfect for each other. It’s an idea I’ve been nursing for a while now, just so many occasions when he’s losing his cool that I almost look around for Katelyn because I know he needs her in that moment. It’s very odd. If I think about it too hard my wrist, the same one Flemeth held and marked, starts to ache fiercely until I let the thought go.

We’re a miserable and quiet bunch as we trek towards the Tower. Even an encounter with a wandering merchant doesn’t help. The news he shares as we investigate what he has for sale is grim but, for me at least, not unexpected.

“I wouldn’t head to the Tower, good folk. It’s been locked down by Templars. Talk of demons wandering the halls” the merchant says chattily as I dig through a pile of shirts.  
“How do you know that?” Aedan asks, prodding a stack of daggers and grimacing.

“My wife’s cousin runs the Inn nearby. The Spoiled Princess. He told me at night you can hear the screams travelling across the water, and they’ve taken his boat, told him no one is to cross without Templar escort.” The merchant replies.

“Wonderful” Aedan says sarcastically, “good to see how everyone pulls together in a blight”

From the corner of my eye I watch as Leliana moves closer to him and brushes her hand against his, giving him a small smile when he looks at her. Aedan softens slightly and gives her a hesitant smile back, reaching for shoes she’s picked up and huffing over how delicate and impractical they are. Frowning when he sees her shoulders curl in a little and gruffly asking ‘how much?’ before handing over coins to the merchant. Once he’s paid he catches Leliana’s hand, kisses it and hands her the shoes with a flourish. I don’t judge Leliana for the blush that stains her cheeks or the gooey look she gives Aedan, I’m only watching from the corner of my eye and I’m ready to hug him for the gesture – I imagine being the receiver of charming-Aedan looks is even more intense. I catch her eye as Aedan moves away and mouth “wow” at her and make a show of catching my breath, she laughs and hugs her shoes to her chest.

I move closer to the daggers the merchant has for sale and ask Leliana’s opinion on them. Her brow creases in thought as she picks up one and holds it as though testing for balance.

“They’re not quite right for you” she says quietly, “the quality isn’t really-“

“They’re junk” Aedan says tersely, “we’ll find you more elsewhere”

Leliana sighs and the merchant bristles and begins to pack up his cart once more, snatching the tunic I’d unearthed from my hand with a hurt “I’d hate for you to waste time on my junk, madam” before giving us a curt nod and continuing on. I sigh and cross my arms over my chest.

“Thanks, Aedan, I really enjoy owning three shirts. No, I don’t want to purchase a fourth, that sounds far too hygienic and handy, please, insult the merchant so he runs away” I snipe sarcastically under my breath.

“That’s rich coming from the girl who got slapped by an Arlessa for being impudent” Aedan scoffs.

“An ugly Arlessa who’s a horrible bitch, please get her description right, I need people to know the full story” I reply back, trying to make my tone as bland as possible.

“Leah!” Alistair groans.

“Alistair, shush or I’m stealing one of your shirts”

“I only have three as well, Leah. We’re all travelling light you know”

“Fine, we can share your third one. I get it every second day after you’ve washed it”

Alistair scoffs “I’m not washing my shirt so you can steal it”

“Fine, I’ll wear the shirt while you wash it. Sound fair?”

Alistair stares at me a moment, gaze flicking to Leliana as she starts laughing and then back to me “I don’t see how that would work” he says slowly, “because you’d be wearing it while I tried to scrub it and… oh…” he trails off, face reddening. 

Leliana links an arm through mine and turns me around to face the right direction, walking beside me as we continue on “I do enjoy your humour, my friend” she says, leaning her head on my shoulder for a moment as we walk. It’s such a familiar gesture, usually between Katelyn and myself, that my eyes suddenly prickle with tears and I have to clear my throat and blink a few times to regain composure.  
“It’s too easy” I say, “it’d be more fun if he’d flirt back. There’s no challenge in it otherwise”

We continue on, arm in arm, for what feels like hours. Our group quiet and moody. Morrigan and Sten seem to be having a competition as to who can be the most aloof while still travelling with our group. Leliana has tried several times to start conversation between us all and after all topics fell flat, has given up in favour of soft humming. Alistair and Aedan lead the way, but don’t appear to be speaking. Aedan seems annoyed that Rory asked to stay in Redcliffe for the moment. I’m so lost in my own thoughts that I don’t pay proper attention to our surroundings at all, and I’m genuinely frightened when Aedan and Alistair break into a run after a woman shouting for help. We follow after and it isn’t until a small explosion makes a tree crash down behind us, cutting off our path, that I realise what this could be.

I back up to the fallen tree and take a seat on a handy branch, waiting. When the dust has settled I dig into my pack, pull out the coil of rope that’s tucked into it and head over to where Alistair, Aedan and Leliana are looking down at a figure on the ground. I circle round them and take up a free spot on the opposite side before crouching down and prodding the prone elf until he wakes.

Zevran blinks and groans, clutching his head. I give him a moment before twirling the rope before him “Hey, lover. You left this behind”

He stills for a moment and then laughs, eyes bright and fixed on me. “Oh Bella, how delightful to see you once more”

“I wish I could say the same, but our last meeting was so unfulfilling” I say in mock sadness.

“My manners are not usually so lacking, I will have to remedy this immediately” he purrs back, eyes dancing with amusement.

I grin “not in front of the Wardens, Zev, they’ll blush”

A groan from above me proceeds Aedan’s terse “Leah, stop flirting with the assassin. Again.”

Leliana holds out a hand for me and helps me to stand, linking her arm through mine and leaning close to softly say “I don’t blame you, you understand, but I can’t survive another day of scowling Aedan”  
“I’m sorry” I whisper back. 

Aedan crouches down next to Zevran and frowns at him “you’re quite possibly the worst assassin I’ve ever met”

“Oh? You have survived others?” Zevran asks jovially. 

Aedan sighs and shakes his head “Look, we’re on a tight schedule here. Are you coming or do I kill you now?”

Zevran looks taken aback and frowns “You wish me to join you?”

“Well we kept Leah, so really everything after that is a step up”

“Hey!” I splutter, slightly mollified when I hear Alistairs equally indignant protest.

“Ah, my Bella. Well then, it seems you need me along to keep her safe, yes? Excellent. I give you my word that no harm shall before the lovely Leah and by extension her companions, at my hand or that of the crows” Zevran says formally, facial features set in a serious expression and then ruining the look with a wink at me.

“Well, I accept” I say quickly.

“Aedan, you can’t be serious, we’re taking the assassin with us?” Alistair asks angrily.

Aedan shrugs “We already have a family slaying Qunari and an angsty witch of the wilds, what’s a failed Assassin between friends?”

“You can’t be serious. Why do we need him?”

“Well we’re heading towards a mages tower that is apparently overrun with demons. We can use him as a decoy” Aedan shrugs.

“Aedan, that was almost funny” I say hesitantly, “are you ill?” Aedan scowls at me and I smile at him, “oh a scowl, thank God for that, I felt all uncomfortable there for a minute”

Aedan smirks “also, he can watch out for Leah while the rest of us concentrate on important matters”

I scowl.

“God?” Leliana asks from beside me, sounding genuinely curious.

“Uhm, Maker. I was raised by dogs. Terrible religious teachers. It’s quite sad really” I say quickly.

“You and Alistair both” Aedan says dryly, catching my gaze and shaking his head slowly at me and managing to just ooze disappointment.

“You know Aedan, you’re just like the big brother I never wanted” I say crossly. 

“Good. Now, if we’re done here?” Aedan asks, stalking off without waiting for a reply.

I reach down and help Zevran up, thrilling at the intense look he gives me before slowly releasing my hand and bowing. A flourish of his hand waving Leliana and I forward. 

“Literally watching my back?” I call over my shoulder.

“No, Bella, my gaze is lower” he replies with a wink.

A laugh escapes me before I can do anything to hold it in and I grin at Zevran happily before turning around and talking with Leliana some more. The road we’re taking is actually quite pretty, the surrounding land is green and the road itself is well maintained and easy to walk. I’m quietly hopeful that my days of tripping over my feet in the Hinterlands are well and truly over.

*

As we approach Lake Calenhad the tower looms in the near distance and my pulse kicks up a notch. It’s huge, the lake and the tower both. I’m having a serious ‘holy shit, this is real’ moment when Zevran moves to my right side and catches my attention with a smirky smile.

"My dear Leah, do you think that perhaps there are magical beasts swimming in the lake, guarding their magic tower? 

"I.. oh wow, I'd never even thought of that! Huh... I mean, all that magic just laying around the place. It's gotta seep into things right? Hey Alistair, does magic seep into things? Like... like suits of armour? Did you ever see any suits of armour just bobbing about?" I ask, feeling my enthusiasm for the idea take off. In my head I’m thinking that maybe it’s like a medieval Hogwarts. 

Alistair groans, "I never became a full templar" 

“I know,” I reply, "but did you hear any stories of things like that?" 

"No, Leah. Just abominations and death. Painful death." Alistair replied grimly, glancing from the Tower to our group and back again. 

I wave a hand in dismissal, "Yeah you guys have that on tap here. But.. I mean..." 

"There was no magical flying armour!" He snaps. 

"Damn" 

The templar waiting by the pier refuses to take us across – until he sees Morrigan among the party, and then offers his services, and boat, in return for a kiss from her. 

"Oh go on, Morrigan, plant a kiss on him. It'll be the most excitement he's ever had" I groan when the Templar stands firm on his request. 

"Certainly not" Morrigan replies. 

“Leliana?” I ask, hopefully.

“I would prefer not” Leliana replies, offering a conciliatory smile to the Templar. 

"Fiiine, I'll kiss him" I sigh. 

The templar looks disappointed and backs away, hands raised slightly as though to fend me off. I bristle and am opening my mouth to give him a scathing tirade of how he's not exactly winning any beauty awards himself when Sten offers some cookies, which are accepted and we set off across then lake leaving only Sten and Morrigan behind. I glare daggers into the back of the Templars head, turning only at a touch on my arm from Zevran. 

"Bella?" He asks quietly. 

"He didn't want to kiss me" I say sulkily. 

"Perhaps you are not his type" Zevran replies with a shrug. 

"Am I your type?" 

Zevean replies with an exaggerated leer "oh yes" 

I hum my approval and settle down closer to him, resting my head on his shoulder with a contented sigh "Good. So, we find a mage, save the demonic child and then - sweaty, grunty sex?" 

Behind us Alistair made a choking noise. Zevran throws back his head and laughs long and loud before kissing the top of her head. 

"That was a no wasn't it" I sigh. 

"Yes, my dear Leah, that was a no to sweaty, grunty sex” he replies, then drops his voice lower and says quietly “However, I would gladly stop by your tent for a massage later.” 

"Naked massage?" I ask, fighting back a grin. 

Zevran hums, as though pondering the idea before tucking an arm around my waist and drawing me closer. "Only if you are a good girl and stop teasing the wardens" he says.

"Zev! You know that's impossible" 

"Ah but maybe with the right incentive...?" 

"You play a hard game" I grumble. 

Zevran leans closer, lips brushing my ear "we could play games later too, I know many you might enjoy" 

I lean into his touch and shiver "So all I have to do is be nice to the wardens?" 

"No making Alistair blush" he replies, fingers tracing lightly over the curve of my ear. 

I narrow my eyes and glance up at Zevran sharply “Zev, the man blushes at everything, he's probably blushing now. He doesn’t even know how to flirt” 

Zevran's long fingers delve into my hair and tickle the back of my neck before curling in and drawing my head closer. “Try” he breathes in my ear, nipping at the lobe before settling me in close to him. I don’t even try and suppress the shiver that runs through me and I resolve to be nothing but sweetness and light. The entire rest of the boat trip across the lake I tell myself how I’m going to be the nicest damn girl these prim Wardens have ever seen. I won’t even blink. I’ll be silent and hold back. Totally possible.

Minutes later the boat reaches the dock for the Tower and one by one our merry band of misfits stands and clambers out. Each time rocking the boat and making me feel a bit seasick. Finally they’re all out and it’s just me, I edge closer on the seat before standing and placing a foot on a lower rung and reaching for a higher one. Just as I’m committing my weight to the ladder the run I’m holding slips out of it’s fastening and I’m left holding a rung in mid-air. I’m so startled that I don’t even brace and land heavily back into the boat. My head hits painfully against the seat and the boat rocks violently. I’m disoriented and more than a little embarrassed and try to right it by leaning my weight forward, but it’s too much and the boat turns over. I land in the cold, weedy waters of the lake. To add insult to injury the boat itself has enough momentum to flip over on top of me, creating a cavern of sorts. Years’ worth of dust and debris that had settled in its base along the joins of wood now trickle out, peppering the air with dust and dirt, coating my face and hair. I swear colourfully, gasping in a lungful of gritty air and instantly regretting it as I start coughing and sucking in more air. My eyes are burning and my head is throbbing like I’ve got a marching band practicing in there. 

Thankfully years of swimming lessons seem to have kicked in and I’m treading water, noticing this seems to help me focus properly and I duck my head closer to the water, sucking in a shallow breath of dust free air. I can feel something warm on my face and swipe a hand over it to clear away the feeling, gasping when I see my hand come away smeared with watery blood. I can hear a faint splash and my imagination decides that now is the perfect time to think about just how big the monsters in this lake must be, and just how many razor sharp teeth they must have. My heart races and I try to take in a deep breath to calm myself, choking and spluttering when I somehow manage to inhale water with my air. I reach out, desperate for the ladder, screaming and writhing when I feel something wrap around my waist. A calm voice cuts through my mind, telling me to be still, to relax, that I’m alright. My foggy brain is keen to obey and a stray thought about falling asleep in the bath surfaces, and makes sense, so I relaxed back into the water and closed my eyes.

I wake a small eternity later to a hard thump against my chest. I open my mouth to shout at whatever, or whoever it is, to back away but its like my mouth opening is a queue for the water I’ve swallowed to make a reappearance and dribble down my chin. I’m awake enough to realise that this is both gross and embarrassing, turning my head and scrabbling to my knees as I vomit up lake water for what feels like forever. When my stomach is finally empty and I’ve managed to supress the dry heaves, I sit back on my heels, breathing heavily and wiping away tears.

“Zev?” I ask as an arm wraps around my waist and a warm kiss is pressed to my hair. I’m surprised to hear how husky my voice sounds.

"I am very cross at you, Leah" Zev says quietly. 

"It's not my fault" I whine pitifully. 

"Yes, but that you should try to leave me is most upsetting. Have I not convinced you to stay?" 

"You were trying to convince me to be good" I reply, trying to laugh but coughing instead. Grimacing at the way my throat aches.

Zevran tuts and smooths back my hair, "you cannot be good if you do not stay, I thought this was obvious" 

"I got hit on the head, made me confused.” I sigh at the rumbled reply I hear and lean back into his warm chest. "Thanks for saving me." 

He sighs, "Alas, my Leah, I am not a swimmer. It was our Warden that saved you. He could not tear his armour off fast enough and was in like a flash" 

"Oh, Alistair” I say warmly. 

"Aedan" Zevran corrects me. 

"What? Zev, did you hit your head too? Aedan hates me. Me drowning would have solved a really big problem for him." 

"And yet here we are" he replies, leaning back and cradling me against his chest. 

I sit quietly for a long minute, letting my thoughts settle and Zevran’s warmth seep into me. After a minute I groan and try to stand, taking Zevran’s hand for help. I scan the area for Aedan, spotting him beneath a nearby tree, half lost in shadow as he stares out into the water. 

“I should probably thank him” I say to Zevran, half-hoping he’d tell me I didn’t need to and finding myself disappointed when he only nodded and told me he’d gather the others now that we were ready. 

I make my way over to Aedan and stop off to one side so I can lean discretely against the tree for support, trying to hide the fact that those few steps had left me exhausted. “Hey” I call out, “copper for your thoughts?”

“You’d be over-paying” he replies darkly, gaze sliding over to me and pinning me in place. I paste on a smile and attempt for a nonchalant shrug of the shoulder, but I know I’ve failed when I see his gaze narrow and frown deepen.

“What in the void where you doing, Leah?” he snaps.

I bristle at his tone “Me? I was climbing out of the damn boat. The rung on the ladder pulled out just as I grabbed it!”

"You're a walking disaster!" 

"Thanks a lot! I came here to thank you, but if you're going to rip my head off for slipping on a rotten ladder you can forget it" I growl, pushing away from the tree with every intention of storming off. Unfortunately my knees were not on board with the plan and chose that moment to buckle. Aedan moves lightning fast and catches me with a hand around my waist, holding me steady.

"You can't even walk!" He snaps. 

"I nearly drowned!" I retort, "sorry that my legs are tired!" 

His growl in reply is deep and low and before I can move he’s lifted me and moved us so that my back is once again to the tree but we’re a few more paces around it, all but hidden from our companions.

"Leah" Aedan says roughly, hand sliding down my arm to rest on my hip. His gaze is dark and heated as it roams my face. “You scared me. When I saw that boat flip over, I thought… I thought you were dead.”

I’m nervous so I revert to terrible humour, twitching my lips into a parody of a smile “thought your lucky day had come, huh?” 

Aedan's grip tightens on my waist and his frown deepens, "No! Leah... you're insufferable and annoying, you distract us from our mission and slow us down" 

I stiffen in response and try to pull away, hissing when Aedan's fingers dig in deeper. 

"Listen, please" he says softly, leaning in close enough for our bodies to nearly touch. "You're maddening and far too smart mouthed for your own good. You're going to get yourself killed one day if you don't watch yourself... and I just..." 

"Want to be the one to kill me?" I ask weakly. 

"No Leah," Aedan said gruffy, "I want… I’ve lost everyone. My entire family. I want-" 

"Aedan! Are we ready?" Alistair calls from the other side of the tree, his voice not too far off. 

Aedan mutters under his breath, staring hard at me for a long moment before stepping back and putting space between us again. “Alistair nearly beat me into the water, you know. Only because he thought he could swim fully armoured.”

“I’m glad you stopped him”

“I don’t think he’s thanking me for it.”

"I - " 

"There you are!" Alistair says, approaching us, "we're ready to go. Leah, they have healers that will look at you while we're here." 

"I, um, right. That's good" I stutter, my gaze shifting to Aedan quickly before flittering away. 

"Can you walk?" Aedan asks quietly. 

I roll my eyes at him as I push away from the tree “yes, Aedan, I’ll be fine.” And I am, until about three steps later when my I catch myself mid-fall, “or I will be, if I walk slowly” I mutter to myself. Squeaking in surprise a moment later when I feel an arm at my back and another behind my knees, lifting me up and drawing me close.

“Thank you, Alistair” I say quietly, stifling a yawn. He sighs as I tuck my head into his shoulder and wrap an arm around his neck.

“I’m glad you’re alright” he says.

“Me too. I’m sorry I scared you all.”

Alistair shakes his head gently, his cheek brushing my forehead is warm and feels kind of nice. He huffs a laugh, “you feel kind of nice too”

It takes me a moment to realise I must have spoken the thought out loud and I cringe a bit but then rally, “you could just carry me everywhere”

“Probably safest” he grumbles, “don’t fall asleep, Leah, you’ve got a head injury.”

“So bossy” I sigh, drifting off towards sleep anyway.


	8. Sleeping on the job

Leah POV

I wake with a pounding headache and a bitter taste in my mouth. I open my eyes and find myself in a room who’s only light source is a small high window with enough light coming through to make me squint. The experience of waking up in an unfamiliar place seems to be lessening in shock factor for me, which kind of makes sense given that there isn’t really anywhere familiar in the world for me. Waking up naked, however, is a new twist to the theme and makes me more than slightly uncomfortable. I tug at the blanket that I’m under, moving it up to my chin and crossing my arms over it for added security. The approach of footsteps has me warring with my temper and genuine curiosity as to how in stories people always show up when you’ve only just woken up. It’s uncanny. 

A moment later a stern looking man in Templar armour enters the room, a robe-wearing man with long blonde hair tied back in a ponytail in tow. The armoured man eyes me dismissively and points me out to his robe-wearing fellow with a wave of his hand before turning to leave. I can’t help a childish sticking out of my tongue at the retreating back and my gaze travels to the robe-wearing man in time to see him make a rude gesture to the Templar at the same time. We catch each other’s gaze and he smiles politely, looking for all the world like a model citizen. My opinion of him goes up several degrees and I quirk a brow at him and grin. He winks in reply.

“I’m Anders, and I’m told you’re Leah. Two rather perturbed looking Grey Wardens ordered your healing before they’d help out with the Tower’s demon problem. That made Gregor furious and me feel rather smug. About time that bastard got taken down a peg or two. Now, they say you hit your head, lets take a look shall we?” he’s been walking as he talks, and is now at my side, hands poised above my head.

I nod once and grimace, my head swimming with the effort to concentrate past the headache and not appreciating much movement. “It aches” I groan, eyes squeezing shut, “I don’t mean to complain, but it really aches.”

Cool fingers probe gently through my hair in a movement so gentle and soothing that I sigh and slump, until they reach a tight knot of pain and I hiss out a protest. Anders hums under his breath, fingers retreating slightly and a delicious cool sensation radiates from them, tingling along my scalp. I sigh once more as the knot of pain eases and my head lolls forward into his hands. “You’ve given yourself a nice cracked skull there” he says quietly, fingers tracking over my scalp once more, leaving a cool trail in their wake.

“Mmh” I reply, eyes drifting close as the cooling sensation tickles down my neck and soothes my aching muscles.

I can hear Ander’s huff of laughter, “no falling asleep, please. This is magic and its meant to be scary and dangerous, why do you think they lock me in a tower?”

“And make you wear a dress” I say sleepily.

“You don’t like my dress?” Ander’s asks distractedly, fingers ever moving. 

"'s pretty" I murmur, smiling in response to Ander's huff of amusement. 

"Alright, Leah, your heads on the mend. Anything else I need to know about?" He asks, drawing his fingers away and smiling at my sleepy cry of disapproval. 

"Mouth tastes funny. Like metal and lemons" 

"That's the head injury, sweetheart. You cracked your head pretty hard, so things are going to taste funny for a while. Maybe smell funny too. How's your vision?" 

"You look beautiful" I say, then yawn hard enough to make my jaw crack. 

"Perfect then, no need to worry" Anders replies, helping me to slide back against the pillows and adjusting the blanket around me once more. 

"'m naked" I grumble, half asleep. 

"Your clothes were wet and muddy, your friend undressed you. Didn't catch the name." 

"Um, male or female friend?" I asked, face flushing. 

"Ho-ho! It's like that is it? Well, it was the pretty bard. Nothing to worry about" 

"Where are they? Have they left me?" 

Anders fusses with the covers again and gently strokes a hand through my hair before rising "No, Leah. They're here, in the Tower. If you sleep now they'll be waiting here for you when you wake" 

"Liar" I slur as my eyes drift shut, unaware of the single fat tear stealing down my cheek. 

Anders soft sigh is the last thing I hear as sleep takes me.


	9. In the Fade

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And a switch to 3rd person because 1st is getting tedious. Shh, pretend it's a seemless transition :)
> 
> I wrote a lot of this story on my phone while on the train and I'm a really lazy proof-reader, so if you see mistakes that I'm missing I'd be grateful for the heads-up.

Aedan POV

Aedan frowned as Duncan stood before him and prattled on about Grey Warden's and peace time. He'd never wanted to be a Grey Warden, in fact he knew he resented Duncan for conscripting him at a time when his family had no other choice – hardly spoke of the 'honour of the Wardens' to Aedan's mind. Alistair may hold the man in high regard but Aedan had known him less than a month and could tell that something wasn't right. Duncan started to chastise him about not paying attention and not holding up the virtues of the Wardens. Aedan felt himself bristle at this and his thoughts focused, he concentrated on what he’d been doing before this moment and when it all became clear once more he smiled savagely and punched Duncan. The thud of his fist against Fade-Duncan’s face was remarkably satisfying. With a mock salute to the spirit he broke free of the dream and went in search of the others. 

It was odd seeing his companions dreams. He found Morrigan first and was relived to see that she too was not so easily swayed, although he was vaguely horrified at how cold and brutal Fade-Flemeth was and mildly surprised at how Morrigan seemed genuinely pleased to see him. As Morrigan’s dream prison shattered they found themselves in a Chantry and saw Leliana locked in the self-flagellation and deep insecurity that the Chantry seemed to inspire in its devout followers. The struggle to get Leliana to move on required more coaxing than Aedan had patience for and for a fleeting moment he wanted to leave her there. Finding Wynne was similar, she was tearing her heart out over apprentices that she’d failed. Despite himself Aedan felt a twinge of kinship with her as he thought of his own family. Next was Alistair who wanted to live with his sister, but was obviously convinced that she'd have dozens of children by now. He moved on and found Zevran last, his being trussed up on a rack and determined to see out the pain, getting angry when Aedan tried to free him from his bindings and not until the mention of his promise to look out for Leah could he be persuaded to believe this was all a dream. 

At one-point Aedan found himself turning into a mouse and running through rooms. It reminded him of a time he and Fergus had tried a powder from a travelling peddler that promised to give insights and vivid visions – they'd both been convinced they were frogs and that someone was going to step on them. The stories of the two of them tangled up in the horse trough, weeping openly, had been the highlight of many young stable hands week. This felt so similar and so much worse because he didn't have his big brother to laugh with afterwards, instead he woke up on a floor liberally smeared with blood and entrails to find his friends groggily awakening as well. 

Then there was the demon fight, because they hadn't killed enough on their way up here. Afterwards they'd walked into an anti-chamber and found a half-mad Templar behind a bubble of magic. It would have been weirder before the 'being a mouse in the fade', but now all he could do was take note at how a small part of his mind was jabbering in fear at the unholy sounds emanating from the chamber they were about to enter while the larger part remained detached and clinical about it all – years of training coming to bear and keep him steady. 

"You'll have to kill them all, it’s the only way. Any of them could be tainted." The half-mad templar, Cullen, raved. 

"I'll take that under advisement" Aedan replied, channelling his father's favourite phrase when faced with unruly petitioners. 

"You risk bringing doom upon us all!" The Templar shouted to their retreating backs. 

Alistair's step faltered as he glanced back at the Templar and then to Aedan, "I knew him before I became a Warden. He was a good man, never one to be harsh or cruel. If he's saying it's hopeless then-" 

"He's been tortured, Alistair. He's not in his right mind right now" Leliana said quietly, her concern showing in the tightening around her eyes and pinching of her mouth. 

"Still" Alistair replied, "we should-" 

"We'll make a judgement call when we get in there" Aedan cut in. "We have the litany, we'll stop this madness and get the facts. Then we'll decide. Until then, focus, all of you." 

They climbed the stairs and Aedan braced to force the door, nearly falling when it opened easily. What they faced the inside was appalling and it took a determined effort of will not to vomit as a terrified mage writhed and screamed and twisted bodily into a melted mass of flesh that rose once more and hovered inches above the floor as a newly minted abomination. Leliana started reciting the chant of light under her breath, much to Aedan's annoyance, and he nudged her to remind her to move. 

"And what do we have here?" The mage in the centre of the room called, "two Grey Warden's? Why didn't you die with your fellows back at Ostagar?" 

"Fate spared us, apparently something knew we'd be needed to dispatch a greasy haired mage with a power complex" Aedan replied dryly. 

"You've been spending too much time with Leah" Alister muttered, sword drawn and eyes scanning the room. 

Aedan couldn't help the way his lips twitched into a smile in response. The smile was wiped away in the next instant as demons turned to face them and the fight began in earnest. At several points he could hear Leliana reciting the chant and he shouted to her to recite "the damn litany, for the Makers sake Leliana." 

Finally it was over. Their ragged breathing filling the chamber. Eyes skipping over the lumps of flesh that filled it, a sight he didn't want to take in too closely right now. "First Enchanter?" He asked, leaning down to help the older man up "we're here to help. Although there are some rather angry Templars downstairs that want to make sure you're not possessed by demons first." 

"Ah, yes. I'm sure they will. Well then, my boy, help an old man hobble to his captors." 

They descended through the gory tower slowly, collecting survivors on the way and finally standing in front of Gregor once more. 

The first Enchanter and Gregor bickered and Aedan sighed inwardly. Eyes scanning the room for a dark haired, smart mouthed girl who irritated easily and was never far from trouble. He leaned towards Alistair, "Find Leah. It's been a whole day since we arrived and that's more than enough time for her to... No wait, nevermind" he finished with a sigh as a shriek cut through the air. 

Alistair was already moving towards the source of the sound, with Aedan close behind. They rounded a corner when a peal of laughter echoed down the corridor, mirthful enough to sound wrong and out of place considering the carnal house they'd just left. They broke into a run and burst through a doorway and into a small courtyard lined with tiered planting boxes. Off to one side stood Leah, head thrown back and eyes closed, a huge smile plastered to her face and droplets of water raining down on her. 

"This is impossible!" She said delightedly, "how did you do it?" She straightened and turned to the man beside her who was watching her with a mixture of fascination and amusement. 

"I'm a mage" the man replied simply. 

"Teach me" Leah replied, reaching for his hand and grinning. The mage looked dumbfounded. 

"Leah!" Alistair barked, making even Aedan startle with surprise. Leah flinched and turned, eyes wide. 

"Alistair? Aedan! You're back!" She smiled broadly and ran towards them, arms opening to catch them both in half hugs that made Alistair blush and Aedan smirk. 

"That's a mage" Alistair said sternly, "why are you out here alone with one?" 

"I know! That's Anders. Did you see what he can do?" 

"We saw plenty of what his kind can do upstairs in the tower" Alistair snapped, gripping Leah's arm and pulling her to his side, glaring at Anders. 

"Alistair, wait-" 

"No, Leah. No." 

"Aedan?" 

"I'm with the angry ex-templar trainee on this one, Leah. No." Aedan replied stonily. 

Leah gave him a dark look and threw a look of sadness at Anders. "I'm sorry. Thank you for healing me, and for showing me magic. It was wonderful." 

"Anytime" Anders called back, pointedly ignoring the glares of two Grey Warden's. 

They walked back with Leah between them and Aedan keeping a quiet tirade about how it was impossible for Leah to remain out of trouble. How she seemed to actively invite danger into her life. Leah sighed and brushed the back of her knuckles against Aedan's gloved hand, causing him to pause long enough to draw breath and glance at her. 

"You were worried. I get it." Leah said quietly. Aedan nodded sharply in reply and stalked ahead. 

Alistair sighed and gave her a tired smile. "Well now we're all done rescuing everyone in this place maybe we can get back to Redcliffe and save the Arl and his son."


	10. Deviations ahead

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I always find the 'I'm not from Thedas' conversations really tedious in other people's stories (sorry other people, I absolutely love everything else about your work), so I skipped it entirely in mine. This is probably incredibly lazy writing, but if you've made it this far in my story then you're already suffering some whiplash from the speed... Anyways. Onwards!

Leah sat on a low hanging branch of a solitary tree in an enclosed courtyard of Redcliffe castle, feet swinging lazily, munching on an apple and enjoying a cool breeze that ruffled lazily through her freshly washed hair, drying it. The sky above was pale blue and scattered with plump white clouds. For the first time in recent memory she felt utterly at peace and happy. Her thoughts idly drifted from how crunchy and flavoursome the apple in her hand was to how good it felt to be clean, properly clean, to how sweet the air smelt, to wondering what lunch would be and if it was far away. She quietly hoped they'd be here for another night; the beds were soft and blankets were warm. It was a welcome change to the tents they travelled with. Perhaps she could smuggle a blanket out with her, surely the Arl wouldn't miss it? 

Movement near the gate to the courtyard caught her attention and she gave a small wave of her hand as Leliana appeared, lute in hand. "I thought you could use some company and some music" she said, settling down on a stone bench near the tree. 

"Sounds lovely, but I'll leave the singing to you. I have it on good authority that I sound like a cat being drowned when I try to sing" Leah replied. 

Leliana gave a startled laugh "well that's a very specific sound! Who said this?" 

"My brother, when we were younger. He was right you know, I can't hold a tune at all. Still, I'd love to hear you sing" 

Leliana picked up the lute and started to play, a sweet light melody that suited her lilting voice beautifully. Leah turned on her branch, letting her back rest against the trunk and balance her legs along the length of the branch, eyes closing as she listened contentedly. 

"Where did you learn to play?" She asked as the song ended. 

"I grew up in Orlais, there it is more common to play than not." Leliana replied, fingers still plucking at the strings. 

"Why did you leave? It obviously makes you happy, so why stop and go to the chantry?" 

Leliana struck a sour note and frowned "that is... A story for another time." 

Leah bit at her lip, considering "well, that's fair. I'm always happy to hear it if you ever want to talk though. I can shut up sometimes, you know. Not for long periods of time, but, it is possible" 

Leliana craned her neck up and gave Leah a look of mock surprise "well this is startling news, a silent Leah." 

"Ha! Remember I did say it wouldn't last long." 

"Very honest of you", Leliana said in mock solemnity. 

Leah huffed a laugh and gnawed at the core of her apple. 

"May I ask a question of you?" Leliana asked a moment later when her fingers had found sweeter notes once more. 

"Ask away" Leah replied, finally giving up on the apple and tucking it up in between some branches above her head. 

"You arrived here at Ostagar, didn't you?" 

Leah nodded, "yep, right before the battle. Alistair and Aedan found me while out in the Korcari Wilds looking for Darkspawn. There's a joke in there somewhere, I'm sure of it." 

"And you can't remember how you got there?" 

"No. I've tried. I remember leaving a party with my friend Katie. I know we walked along a really well-lit street, and that she was laughing - we both were - because she'd just won this amazing scholarship offered to insanely smart people like her. Then all of a sudden it was like all hell broke loose. Sirens and car alarms going off and this weird green fog that moved so quickly I couldn't even run... and then, Korcari Wilds and a lot of Genlocks wandering up to say hello and kill me. Very welcoming." 

"And two Grey Warden's saving you." 

"Well, one Grey Warden who was convinced I was a witch of the wilds and three recruits" Leah replied. 

"Did you think he was handsome the moment you saw him?" Leliana asked, the tune changing once more to something whimsical. 

"Alistair? I don't know, I just remember thinking 'wow he's tall' and then 'oh that’s a lot of blood and guts'" 

"Well him and Aedan both" Leliana pressed. 

Leah drew in a quick breath, "Aedan looked terrifying. He hacked into those Darkspawn as though each one had personally insulted him, and he moved like nothing I've ever seen. It still baffles me how someone can make killing look like a seductive dance, but, he does. I was gawping like a stunned fish when he finished. He turned around and I was convinced he was going to say something heroic or kiss me or something - I mean everything else had been a strange dream up until this point, so why not, right?" 

Leliana hummed in agreement and motioned for Leah to continue. 

"So he opens his mouth, which is perfect even when blood splattered, and says 'are you always so useless in a fight?' And then criticised Alistair for suggesting I tag along. Said that if I was stupid enough to be out here on my own then I deserved to die." 

Leliana gasped and her fingers stilled, "really?" 

"Really, really." Leah replied grimly. "I owe it to Alistair that I'm even here now. I think he regrets it though, he doesn't like me much." 

"Well you do tease him a lot." 

Leah sighed and leaned back further into the tree, "not on purpose. It's just that everything I say seems to make him blush or offend him. I don't know.... I was thinking... maybe, I should, I don't know... stay here?" 

"In Redcliffe? Would you like that?" Leliana asked. 

"I... suppose so? I don't know really, I mean Rory did and he’s more useful than me. I can't fight and all I do is make Alistair and Aedan frustrated and angry by turns. So, it makes sense, right?" Leah said, hearing the sadness in her own voice and frowning. 

"I would miss you, my friend" Leliana replied. "But I do understand if you grow tired of travelling with us." 

Leah tried to smile and grimaced instead. "I don't even know if they'd let me, or what I'd do if I did. I feel so out of place here. Useless. It's awful." 

Leliana stood, stepped on the bench and swung up into the tree on a nearby branch "that does sound awful indeed" she said thoughtfully. "Ordinarily I would suggest the Chantry to you, but in times such as these even they cannot offer you much respite." 

"Oh, I'm not a religious person really" Leah said hastily, "I don't think I'd be a good fit." 

"Well, what would suit you? What are you good at?" Leliana asked kindly. 

"That's an excellent question. I wish I knew the answer. At home I was working in an office job, running errands for people and answering their calls. Before that it was just bar work, serving drinks. I was studying too, literature and history. None of that really applies here" she frowned "I guess bar work? I feel like it's more hazardous here. Higher chance of getting my butt pinched. I'm not okay with that" 

"And yet I've heard you say far worse to Zevran," Leliana teased. 

Leah threw her hand up in mock faint "ah Zevran, so handsome, so cruel to deny me his naked self." 

"I think he enjoys the flirting." 

"Well that makes two of us" Leah laughed. 

"You could- oh" 

Leliana's reply was interrupted by Aedan entering the courtyard and finding them in the tree, he turned on his heel and shouted "Alistair, come and look at this tree, it's growing pretty women!" And then laughing as he approached them. Alistair ducked his head around the corner a few moments later and laughed when he saw Leliana and Leah, following Aedan towards them. 

"Well, one pretty one and one Leah" he said jovially. 

"Hey!" Leah replied, reaching up to the remnants of apple core and throwing it squarely into Alistair's chest. He looked down at the small damp mark it left and frowned. 

"I suppose I deserved that" he grumbled. 

"We've come to collect you for a small feast the Arlessa is insisting upon having. Apparently the perfect time for a party is in the middle of a Blight. But she is Orlesian, and we do need her husband's forces, so here we are." Aedan spoke as he jumped lightly up onto the stone bench and offered a hand to Leliana – helping her down from the tree. 

Leah knew better than to wait for the same assistance and didn't want to give Aedan the satisfaction of seeing her hurt by the lack of it, so slid down to a lower branch and then jumped off onto the ground with a small wince as she landed heavily, her ankle letting her know that it didn't appreciate such treatment. She dusted herself off and kept herself slightly apart from her companions as they made their way back through the gate into the castle proper. Close enough to hear the conversation, but not feeling compelled to join it, she let her attention wander as she took in the castle surrounds and tried to imagine what it would be like to live there. Wondering what work she would do, if she'd be happy, who her friends would be. 

"Everything alright?" Alistair asked, having stopped to let her catch up while Aedan and Leliana continued ahead. 

"Fine" Leah replied, flashing a brief smile, "just thinking." 

Alistair arched a brow at her and gave her a teasing smile "well, that's a first." 

Leah bristled. "Because you know me so well, Alistair. We're so close you and I. We've had such amazing conversations – you lecturing me on how I'm always in trouble, the time you and Aedan tag teamed a lecture on how I slow you down, or, my personal favourite, the never-ending lecture on how I invite trouble into everyone's lives. That one is my favourite. Love it" Leah snapped, coming to an abrupt halt, "actually you know what, make my apologies – not that anyone will care – because I'm not going to this stupid thing. I'm done." And with that she turned on her heel and walked away, bristling even harder when she heard Alistair sigh and continue on without trying to stop her or call her back. Tears stung her eyes and she brushed them away angrily. 

The room she'd been assigned to was near the servant’s living areas and on some level she knew that was insulting, but honestly hadn't cared once she'd seen the comfy bed and lockable door. She stopped by there now and collected her meagre possessions, shoving some tunics and pants from the draws into her bag as well and smiling grimly at how theft was now a thing she did. She compressed the contents of her bag enough to smuggle in a thin blanket as well and zipped it up, grateful that she'd had the huge thing with her when she found herself here. 

Finally she followed the corridor down to the kitchens and begged some bread and another apple, stuffing them into the last free space of the bag before taking the servants entrance out of the castle and down the hill into Redcliffe proper. She arrived at the Chantry and found one of the sisters who'd been organising the carts of refugees who wanted to go to Denerim. An hour later she was perched on railing near the docks, waiting for the cart that was leaving that evening to be ready – her place on it agreed upon with the Chantry sister. Whatever came next she was sure she'd find a better start to life here in a major city and not traipsing around the countryside with people who spent their days lecturing her. 

The driver shouted out his readiness to leave and Leah approached with a handful of others. Among them a lady and her young son. Leah sat down next to them on the cart and engaged the boy in a conversation about his stuffed bear as the cart drove through Redcliffe and out of the gates. She permitted herself a glance at the retreating castle and a sarcastic mental salute to its occupants before returning to the boy and his bear once more. 

\-- 

"What do you mean 'gone'? Gone where? Gone how?" Aedan snapped. 

Leliana sighed and Morigan smirked as Alistair flinched "just gone. Packed up and left." 

"Maker's breath, that woman is infuriating" Aedan thundered, "well we're not looking for her, if she wants out that's her choice. Come on, we have more important things to be doing" he snatched up his pack and stormed out of the castle. The others followed suit and it wasn't until they were half a day away that someone enquired after Zevran and his whereabouts. 

The assassin joined them later that night and would only smile enigmatically when questioned. Aedan demanded Alistair spar with him and both fought savagely well into the evening. Conversation around the fire was subdued that night. Leliana tried to play but gave up when Aedan scowled and stalked away. Alistair looked miserable and Morrigan, as usual, kept to herself. Only Zevran seemed unaffected by it all, laying back with his hands tucked under his head as he gazed up at the stars, a smile playing at the edges of his mouth. 

"Where are we headed now?" Leliana asked once Aedan returned. 

"Brecilian Forest and Denerim" Alistair replied. "The forest for the elves, we have a treaty for them, and Denerim for a Father Genativi, he might know more about the sacred ashes and healing the Arl" 

"I suggest Denerim first" Zevran said lazily, "there is a package there I need to collect." 

"Payout from another failed assassination attempt?" Alistair asked dryly. 

"Ah, my dear Warden, they do not pay if you fail. And this package is far more interesting than money." 

"Right. Forget I asked" Alistair replied. "Do you want first watch?" 

"I am wide awake, it will be no hardship" Zevran replied cheerily. 

And with that, they slept, while Zevran smiled to himself and marvelled at how one strange girl could make so many people happy by simply being present.


	11. Bar work has got to be a multidimensional trait

Denerim was bustling and full to bursting with people visiting the market in the centre of town. The day was warm and city smelt of too many unwashed bodies in too close confines. The wagon had dropped them off at the gates, the driver wishing them well and turning around immediately. The woman, Emma, and her son Max had chatted with Leah during the two-night trip. The three of them sharing a tent made of Leah’s stolen blanket. Now that they were here Leah began to feel foolish for having left the only familiar faces she had on a fit of anger, which had long since cooled. She bit at her lip as she entered the main gates with the others, trying to keep her uncertainty at bay. 

"Do you have somewhere to stay?" Emma asked as they entered the market. 

"I... No. No, I don't know anyone here" Leah replied trying her best not to sound pathetic. 

"Good" Emma replied, sounding relieved. 

"Ah, is it?" Leah replied.

"Oh! What I meant was, come and stay with us for a bit then. I'm staying with my cousin, she lives near the market. We can stay there until we find work. It'll be nice to have a friend nearby" Emma said quickly. 

Leah smiled and ruffled Max's hair, "well if you're sure your cousin won't mind? I'd be honoured. Thank you." 

"I should warn you" Emma said quietly, "to set your expectations low. She lives near the alienage. Nasty side of town, very run down. On account of the elves, you know" 

"O-of course" Leah stuttered, thinking of Zevran and feeling a little like she was betraying him. 

"No need to be scared, mind. My cousin doesn't hold with elves. We'll be fine." Emma said cheerily, sailing away to round the market. 

Leah swallowed heavily and hesitated. Her options were slim, it was true, but hanging out with racists felt like a new level of desperation. She frowned, threw a mental apology to Zev and resolved to get her life together quickly. Then hurried to catch up to Emma and Max. 

\-- 

Zevran pov   
Zevran scowled at the armoured back of the Warden that walked before him into the Brecilian Forest. The man might be half of the duo set to save the country from a Blight but he was arrogant and slow. His insistence that they traipse through this accursed forest in search of the Dalish had meant a delay in their trip to Denerim. Unsurprisingly the Dalish did not want to be found and had led them on a merry dance for nearly a week before finally bringing them in to the main camp – tired, hungry and arguing bitterly amongst themselves. They'd been held for three days before finally the Keeper had come to see them, a further two days for negotiations and now they were tramping through the undergrowth in search of lost people, living trees and a wolf woman. 

Zevran was not amused. 

More than a month had passed since they'd left Redcliffe and along the way to this void-taken forest they'd stopped and helped every man and his dog, of which there were a surplus in Ferelden, and each time Zevran's patience grew thinner. His resolve to not kill the Warden grew weaker and his desire to reach Denerim stronger. Add in the Dalish speaking elves correcting his Elven at every chance they got and he was feeling downright unpleasant. Of course he couldn't explain why he wanted to get there so badly, so his mood was inexplicable, or put down to plain hunger, by the rest of his companions. 

He forced himself to take a deep breath and released it slowly. 

This was just a setback. They would reach Denerim soon. He would find Leah. The trail she left wouldn't have gone cold. Algerall he was a Crow, he could find anyone. He smiled grimly as shouts up ahead alerted the rest of them to the presence of Sylvans and he dove into the fight, eager despite the eeriness of trees screaming out curses as he cut them down. He fought wildly and with grim, efficient purpose. Finding himself heaving for breath in an area strewn with branches and leaves and unsure of how long he'd been standing there before finally catching up with his companions once more. Cleaning his daggers, rechecking his potions and resting. 

Another day closer to Denerim and Leah. He smiled savagely at the thought. 

__ 

Leah POV  
Leah narrowed her eyes and hunched forward, staring down her companion on the opposite side of the barrel that was currently being used as a table for their card game. "I warn you, I'm not going to let you win this time" she said smugly, not breaking eye contact as she lay her card down with a snap. 

The elven man across from her gave her a toothy grin and leaned forward to meet her, green eyes flashing as he too placed a card down without glancing away "I wish you every luck imaginable, you're going to need it." 

Leah's eyes narrowed further and she wrinkled her nose, eyes darting down for an instant and back again to meet his before the sight registered properly and her eyes and mouth widened in shock "You... How?! You sneaky... damn it. Well played, Pol. You utter bastard." 

Pol threw back his head, laughing loudly "What was that about letting me win?" 

"Yeah, yeah, rub salt in the wound." Leah groused good naturedly, reaching for her ale and downing the last of it with a gulp. "God this stuff is awful, why do we drink it?" 

"Could be worse, if I wasn't friends with the bar wench I'd have to pay" Pol shrugged, taking a swig of his own ale. 

Leah feigned a dramatic sigh, "and so the truth comes out, you only like me because I bring you awful ale." 

"Well that and you're pretty. For a shem." He teased. 

"You're not so bad yourself, you know, for a short elf" she replied. 

"Taller than you!" He said indignantly. 

"Huh! Pol I could use you as an arm rest" Leah retorted, snatching up the cards and tapping them straight, "anyway, I should do some actual work now. Wait for me?" 

"Of course, can't have you walking the streets alone." 

"People might think you're my not-very-cute Mabari!" Leah teased, standing. 

Pol scowled and waved her off to the kitchens "away with you, wench, go make your tavern pretty for the common folk" and with that he tilted his chair back to lean on the wall and pointedly placed his feet on the barrel top. 

Leah rolled her eyes and left him there, cleaning and stacking the remaining mugs, wiping down the constantly sticky benches (she often thought that at best she just redistributed the stickiness for a new day) and doing a hasty sweep of the floors. A final scan of the room told her that it was as clean as ever, and after a month or so of working here she knew full well that it was never really clean – although certainly much improved over when she'd started – and returned to Pol. Taking care to tread lightly as she approached him from behind, lunging forward at the last moment to try and wrap her hands over his eyes. The next instant happened as a blur of images as he grabbed her hands, curved his back and sent her flying over him and sprawled out on the floor. Leah groaned and tried to stand, huffing indignantly at her predicament. Above her Pol chuckled and held out a hand. 

"You're still trying with that one huh?" He asked, pulling her up. 

"You've got to let your guard down at some point, and when you do, I'll be ready" she replied, "how do you hear me every time? I was holding my breath and everything." 

Pol tugged at his ear "perk of not being human" he said. 

"But how good is it? Can you hear, say, a mouse in the rafters?" 

He cocked his head to the side for a moment, "yep, there's a few of them up there. Big ones." 

"And how far outside the tavern can you hear them?" 

"Depends on how hard I'm trying and how noisy it is outside." 

"Huh... how do you not have a constant headache? Doesn't all that sound just, sort of, overload your brain?" Leah asked, genuinely curious. 

"Sometimes, but mostly I've learnt to block it out. Like it all just becomes so much background noise" Pol replied, sweeping an arm out to indicate she should walk through the door first. 

Leah nodded as she passed, "makes sense" she replied and waited until he'd closed the door before she handed him the key to lock it. He did and handed it back with a flourish that made her smile and bob a curtsy in mimicry of his fine manners. They both laughed quietly and Leah tucked the key in her pocket, blinking in surprise at Pol's outstretched arm when she looked back up. 

"May I walk you home?" He asked shyly, cheeks flushing slightly. 

Leah felt her own cheeks warm in response as she tucked her hand into the crook of his arm and smiled at him "huh, you've gotten taller, I was sure you were shorter than me" she replied. 

Pol gave an exaggerated sigh and grumbled about human eyesight. 

"Hey Pol, can you hear this" Leah whispered under her breath, watching her friend closely. Pol's eyebrow quirked and he nodded slowly. 

"Interesting" Leah said at normal volume once more. Pol sighed and nudged her "come on, pretty shem girl, let's get you home." 

They walked arm in arm through the streets away from the Pearl and towards Tania's house in the docks district. Having lived with Emma and her cousin Goldanna for only a fortnight, and having found employment at the Pearl, Leah had been quick to move on and away from them. Fortunately Tania, who also worked as a barmaid at the Pearl had a room available and was more than happy to have the company while her husband was away at sea. Tania was also far more tolerant of elves and didn't make snide remarks when Pol walked Leah home. 

The night air was cool and still and did nothing to chase away the all pervasive smell of rotting seaweed that was strongest at low tide. Leah's nose wrinkled and she grimaced at Pol, who shrugged   
"Still smells better than the alienage." 

"And yet I don't see you house picking around here" Leah replied as they stepped out onto the mess of walkways that formed the docks. Ambling to a railed section that gave a good view of the water and pausing there. 

Pol fixed her with an unreadable expression, "Leah... I'm elvan, I don't get to choose. Not here." 

Leah coloured and her step faltered, "I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking." 

He nodded and looked out past the docks and wide expanse of rotting seaweed to the receding sea. The Amaranthine Ocean crashing and rumbling in the distance. 

"We could leave. Take a ship. Go somewhere new" he said softly. 

"Run away and join the Dalish" she grinned, "think they'd take us?" 

"I'd vouch for you" he said loyally. 

"Keeper I know her ears are round, but her soul is – actually no that's human as well, but she plays cards terribly and promises to be nice to the Halla. Please can she stay?" Leah said, trying her best to mimic Pol. 

"Was that me you were trying to imitate just now? Because if so, that was horrible. My voice is far deeper and more manly than that" he replied, tugging her forward and looping his arms loosely around her shoulders. 

Leah gave him a crooked smile “I mean I could try again if it was that bad. Maybe if I was short, like you.”

"You're terribly unfunny when you do these things" he replied, biting back a smile. 

His eyes darted off to the side and his back stiffened, he pulled away enough to leave space between them and moved to block Leah from view of the street. Leah's gaze darted from his face to over his shoulder and back again, "what?" She asked, repeating the question when Pol gave a shake of his head and a shushing gesture. 

"Pol!" She whisper-yelled. 

"Leah, please, be still" he replied, leaning forward to whisper in her ear. His breath tickled and Leah flashed a smile at him, reaching up to cup his cheek in her palm when he smiled back. 

"I'm scared" she admitted in a whisper, "tell me there's nothing to be scared about and you're just being silly." 

"I won't let anything happen to you" he said fiercely, gaze locking with hers, "but please, da'mi, be still." 

Leah nodded once and stepped closer to get warmer and then stilled. A few moments later her human ears picked up what Pol's elven hearing had caught sooner. A group of very drunk men staggering home along the street. She sagged slightly in relief and looked up at Pol, flashing him a smile and mouthing "so drunk" to him as the group broke into rowdy song. Pol's lips thinned and he tilted his head in acknowledgement, eyes fixed hard ahead as though he could see her but was concentrating on the noise behind him. They staggered by, one of them pausing to vomit loudly into the empty seabed while his friends jeered. Leah's face twisted in disgust and she turned away from the sight. Eventually the man stopped retching and straightened. 

"Hey... hey! You! Out on the docks! Who's out there? What are you doing near my ship?" The man called drunkenly, words heavily slurred. 

Leah looked quizzically at Pol, they were nowhere near any ships and she couldn't see anyone else on the dock ways. Pol stiffened and fixed her with a hard look. Leah nodded her head infinitesimally and imagined herself melting into the shadows. 

"Not a word" he whispered, feather soft, "be still." 

Eventually the man gave up and staggered away, Leah didn't draw a full breath until Pol did and even then she felt shakey. 

"That was... strange" she said quietly, "why were you so worried?" 

Pol smiled sadly and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, "do you know what people call women who are seen with elves?" 

"Friends of elves?" Leah replied weakly. 

"No, sweetheart" he replied softly, reaching for her hand and tugging her close. Placing a kiss on her forehead, "they call them... it doesn't matter. But they will not say that about you in my hearing and live. Come on, let me take you home." 

"Pol" she said softly, catching his hand and placing a kiss on his palm "I don't care what other people think." 

He smiled sadly and held her hand as they walked back across the docks and onto the street. Leah was lost in thought as they walked, her thumb rubbing idly against Pol's longer, more graceful fingers as they walked. She tripped and he caught her, eyes sparkling with laughter. 

"Human grace leaves a lot to be desired" he teased. 

"Hey don't judge my entire race on my lack of cat's grace, I feel like I'm letting team human down." 

"But carrying it in so many other ways" he replied grimly, his laughter disappearing and grimness replacing it. He shook his head and gave her a wan smile "anyway, here we are my lady. Safe and sound." 

"Kind sir, I thank you" she quipped, darting forward to brush a kiss to the corner of his mouth. Pol looked pained and glanced around quickly. 

"You take too many chances" he admonished softly. 

"I don't get it, you can hold my hand but I can't kiss you goodnight?" Leah replied, feeling bruised. 

"We can be seen as friends with only a little teasing, Leah. But if people think we're anything more than the ugly names will start. You deserve better than that. Better than I can give you." 

Leah gave him a hurt look and stared at her feet for a long moment. She took a deep breath and painted a bright smile to her face, "right. Well then, I should let you go. Thank you for escorting me home. Good night." 

"Leah" Pol groaned, "please..." 

"No, I understand perfectly. Thank you for explaining it so well. It must be hard to deal with a shem girl and her slow wits. You're very kind, Pol." Leah said quickly, feeling her smile dim, she waved goodbye and slipped into the house. Closing the door firmly behind her and locking it. She made it to her room before she started to cry.


	12. Whats a nice girl like you doing in a place like this

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ahh, I'm not thrilled with this chapter... but I like it enough to keep it anyways.

Alistair moved around the fire and crouched next to Aedan as he warmed his hands over the blaze. "Do you think Zevran's alright?" He asked. 

Aedan quirked a brow "you're asking after the assassin now? How big hearted of you, brother." 

Alistair gave him a crooked grin, "It was your choice to bring him along, if you remember. I'm just wondering if it was a good choice or if he's going to snap and kill us all in our sleep." 

Aedan grimaced, "not entirely my choice." 

"Ah... yes. Well, seeing as she's not here to blame, the responsibility falls to you" Alistair replied. 

"I can hear you, you know" Zevran called lazily from the other side of the fire, "and I assure you, should I wish to you dead, dear Wardens, I would not need to wait until you were asleep. I walk behind you all day long, do you think me ignorant to how many weaknesses a man's back has?" 

"Annnd that's not a comforting thought" Alistair grumbled. 

"Nor was it meant to be." Zevran replied coolly. 

"Enough" Leliana sighed, "we are all tired and irritable. This conversation helps nothing." 

"I was only asking a question" Alistair sulked. 

"Perhaps you should go back to staring at your naval, you were so good at it" Morigan replied dryly. Beside her Wynne sighed and stood. 

"Now children," she sighed, "bedtime for you all." 

Zevran chuckled at Morigan's indignant squawk and Alistair’s muffled laughter. He watched as they made their ways to their tents and leant back to stare at the stars, sighing a moment later as footsteps approached. 

"My dear bard, have you come to sing to me?" He asked lightly. 

Leliana smiled down at him and shook her head, "no, I'm here to ask if you know how Leah is doing. I miss her." 

"Honestly, I do not know. Well, I hope. I will have more for you when we finally leave this accursed forest and enter Denerim" he replied quietly. 

"Her trail is nearly two months old now, do you think you will find her so easily?" 

Zevran smiled wickedly at her, "oh Leliana, you know as well as I do that our dear Leah is not able to blend in. I will find her, have no fear." 

"Good" said Leliana, a faint smile playing on her lips, and headed back to her tent. 

\-- 

Leah leant against the bar, chin cupped in her hand, and watched with idle interest as the brawl in the corner stepped up a notch from 'normal everyday brawl in the Pearl' to something a bit more heated. At its centre was a dark-haired woman with dual daggers who laughed loudly, spoke saucily and moved seductively amongst the participants lined up against her. 

"Isabella's drawing a crowd again" Pol said from behind her, taking a break from stocking mugs and rolling out barrels of ale. 

"Mm-hm" Leah replied lazily, not lifting her chin from her hand. 

"Still mad at me, huh?" He asked softly. 

A quirked brow was all the reply that he got. 

"Fenedhis" me muttered darkly, stalking out the back once more. Leah didn't turn from the spectacle before her. 

At closing time, after Cavin had chased out the last patron and nodded at her before leaving himself she went through her usual routine of clearing and cleaning mugs before stacking them for the use the next day. She locked the front door and wiped over the tables and started to sweep the floor. Her usual desire to hurry and go hadn't been there for the better part of a week now, so she took her time and got the broom into all the nooks and crannies the crooked tavern had to offer – even going to so far as to knock some ancient cobwebs from their corners. At last, tired and sore, she put the broom away, gathered her things and slipped out the back door, locking it behind her. She sighed softly as she turned around and took in the empty storage area that comprised of the back of the tavern, telling herself that Pol’s continued absence was for the best and reminding herself of her plan to catch a ship to Kirkwall or Antiva. She wanted to see something of this strange new world she found herself in and tried to brighten herself up by thoughts of exotic non-Denerim places and fine wines and cheeses. She huffed a quiet laugh to herself at the idea of being a fine lady in a fine dress – for some reason she always was in these idle daydreams – and walked briskly down the street, making it home without incident and slipped inside. She never once seeing the blonde elf that had trailed her steps or marked her progress. 

From the shadows, Zevran smiled and leant back against the wall behind him. He had meant to step out and stop Leah but had noticed another following her progress and halted his plan. An elvan boy, in clothes with more mended spots than actual original clothing, had been watching her intently – scanning every street she entered and staying within easy distance should she need him. It had been endearing to watch and Zevran felt the slightest prickle of jealousy that someone else had fallen prey to Leah's charms so quickly, mollified slightly by the fact that the other person was a mere boy. 

Pol watched Leah enter her house and sighed. Drawing a short knife from his pocket he approached the door and whittled two small symbols into the wood of the door frame. One for "elf friend" and the other of protection. His mother had been Dalish and taught him what little he knew of the language and symbols of the people. when he'd finished he turned the knife to its hidden pocket and began the trip back to the alienage. Unaware that he'd been observed. 

\-- 

Aedan wasn't entirely sure how the night had started but as with all evenings in Denerim it involved a trip to the Pearl. The whole party was glum and out of sorts. The trip into the Brecilian forest having taken a heavy toll on their time and morale. The gates of Denerim had seemed a heavenly sight and Aedan had dug into his personal stash of coins to pay for rooms for them at a decent inn. 

"Perhaps we should visit the Pearl, for some entertainment" Zevran had suggested as they staggered out of the Gnawed Noble. Alistair had been too naive to know what the Pearl had a reputation for, but Leliana and Aedan had shared a look before agreeing readily, and so to the Pearl they went. 

They entered and found a table that was a chair short. Aedan had smiled at Leliana and she'd smiled demurely back before sitting on his lap and wrapping an arm around his shoulders. Alistair had blushed and looked away quickly while Zevran scanned the room, his gaze snagging on something momentarily before continuing on. Aedan had been about to question him when he'd been distracted by the bard in his lap wriggling enticingly and looking invitingly at him. He let her lead him away to a room out the back. 

"They're… are they really going to do that here?" Alistair asked, scandalised. 

Zevran chuckled "the life of a Grey Warden is uncertain in a blight, isn't it? Best take your pleasures while you can, my friend. Perhaps we could find a companion for yourself?" 

"Er, no." Alistair replied quickly. 

"No one entices you? Not even the pretty bar maid over there?" He waved off to one side at a dark-haired girl good naturedly fending off a patron. 

Alistair’s gaze followed almost involuntarily and he stared for a long moment at the bar maid. Face scrunched up as though trying to solve a particularly complex problem. 

"Oh, it's Leah" he said eventually, sounding both perplexed and relieved. 

Zevran looked smug, "indeed it is." 

They watched as Leah extricated herself from the enthusiastic patron and retreated to the safety of the bar once more. She scanned the room, passing over then without hesitation and then turned in response to a call from an Elvan man from a doorway behind the bar. She quirked a smile at him and approached. Zevran recognised him as the boy who'd followed her home the previous night. He watched closely as they spoke, their proximity suggesting they were known to each other and friendly. The briefest of touches from the man to Leah hinting to the keenest observer that there was an interest beyond friendship there. 

"Should we say hello?" Alistair asked uncertainly and Zevran nodded. They approached the bar, Zevran’s ears straining to listen in on the conversation Leah was having and catching only threads. 

"...you come? With me. As... As a... Friend" the boy said lamely, obviously pained by his choice of words. 

Leah smiled at him and brushed her fingers over his "Pol, you know I-" 

"You see Alistair, I told you there could not be another woman like our Leah. Her features are too extraordinary to be mimicked" Zevran said loudly, catching Leah's attention. 

Leah startled and stepped back in surprise, gaze sweeping from him to Alistair quickly. In the same instant Pol stepped forward, angling himself between Leah and the bar. Zevran would have applauded the move had he not been so annoyed at the possessiveness of the gesture. 

Leah's hand touched Pol's back gently and she spoke softly, so that Zevran only just heard her words. 

"Atish'an, Pol. I know them. Travelled with them for a time." (Peace) 

Zevran flinched at the lack of an endearing phrase such as 'friends'. He wondered if he'd made a mistake in coming here. It seemed the boy picked up it's absence as well. 

"Falon?" He enquired softly. (Friends) 

Leah gave him a smile twisted with sorrow "sort of" 

Alistair hadn't been able to hear the conversation and now leaned closer over the bar "so Leah, glad to see us? You missed the Brecilian forest. It was... Ah... Green." 

"You don't say" she replied at normal volume once more. Pol made a disgusted noise and crossed his arms in front of his chest, facing Alistair but eyes fixed to Leah. She flicked a smile to him and touched his arm briefly. 

"It's alright, Pol. Wait for me?" 

Pol sighed and nodded, brushing past her and whispering "when you are done with these Felassan I will walk you home" (slow arrow) 

"Ma serannas, Pol" Leah whispered back, leaning into him for the briefest of touches. (Thank you Pol) 

She looked up and smiled politely at Zevran and Alistair "what's a nice Warden and his assassin doing in a place like this?" She asked quietly. 

"Well Aedan and Leliana are here too, but, um busy" Alistair trailed off, his eyes flickering to the hallway that lead to the entertaining rooms of the Pearl. Leah snickered. 

"Good for them" she grinned. "So you and Zevran were looking for a room, or just waiting for them to... finish?" 

Alistair blushed furiously, "no! We came over here to ask after you." 

"My dear Warden, I'm flattered but uninterested. Thank you anyway" she teased, making Zevran laugh and Alistair turn bright red. 

"I didn't... I wasn't... I - I had actually missed you up until now!" He stammered. 

"Oh dear, no one to lecture? How do you pass the time. Well, not in brothels obviously" she snickered. 

"You can get me a drink, wench" he replied crossly, smirking a bit when Leah laughed and obliged. 

Zevran leaned closer when she returned "how long have you been speaking elven?" 

"She speaks elven? Leah, you speak it? We could have used you in the forest!" Alistair said. 

Leah shrugged, "there are lots of elven staff here. They use it a bit and I sort of picked it up over time." 

"And practiced with your friend, Pol" Zevran added. 

"Yes" Leah replied simply, meeting his gaze. 

Zevran gave her a dazzling smile and winked "it suits you, vhenan. The words sound natural on your tongue." 

"Vhenan?" She asked quietly "I don't know that one" 

Zevran chuckled "it would be odd to hear it spoken in a place like this." 

"Ma nuvenin" she replied slowly. (As you say) 

"He-ey" Alistair whined, "what are you two saying?" 

"Sorry, Alistair" Leah muttered, 

Zevran smirked, from the doorway behind them a low rumble of laughter could be heard. Leah tilted her head towards the sound and grinned. 

"So, want to come to Orzammar with us?" Alistair asked, feigning nonchalance. 

Leah shook her head, "not really, no. I hate the dark. And caves. And prolonged periods in still air underground." 

"Well when you put it like that, I don't want to go either... Got any spare dresses? Bet I'd make a great bar wench" Alistair replied. 

Leah huffed a laugh. Her attention drawn across the room to a patron she patted Alistair's hand absently and excused herself. The rest of the night was filled with broken conversation as Leah worked and Alistair and Zevran hovered. Eventually Aedan and Leliana emerged, hands entwined and gazes lingering on each other. When Leliana caught sight of Leah she shrieked and embraced Leah tightly, exclaiming her delight at seeing her friend once more. 

"And you've grown your hair!" Leliana said, "it's lovely." 

Leah blushed and tugged at the ends of her hair self-consciously “ah, thank you. Where's Barkspawn?" 

Alistair grinned "he's back at the Gnawed Noble, that's where we're staying. You should come and see him, he was sleeping on my bed and snoring when I left." 

"And so Alistair finally asks Leah to his room" Aedan deadpanned. 

"And Aedan proves yet again that the Mabari has better manners than the orphan lordling brat" Leah replied casually, making a show of inspecting her nails. 

Aedan's eyes flashed and he stilled, Leliana gasped and stepped back, Alistair's eyes widened, and he stepped closer to Leah, angling himself between her and the table where Aedan sat. "Ever the wit, Leah" he muttered, gently nudging her away. 

"Yes, how we've missed that dangerous tongue of yours" Aedan growled. "How fortunate that no one has cut it out." 

"Dhava 'ma masa, Aedan" (kiss my ass) she spat angrily. Around them elvhan patrons were beginning to take notice. 

"Maker's breath, Leah" Alistair groaned "we just came to see you, not fight." 

"Why are you even here? Why did any of you come? You made it abundantly clear that I wasn't wanted, wasn't useful. I mean we were thrown together by accident anyway, there's no need to try and rekindle friendships that never really existed... I just... " She trailed off and sighed rubbing a hand over her face. "Forget it" she muttered and stalked away. 

"Well" Alistair sighed "that went well. Shall we go and ruin someone else's evening now or are we done here?" 

"Wasn't my idea to come here, although I have had a splendid evening" Aedan replied, tugging Leliana back into his lap and kissing her soundly.

"Riiight, very helpful" Alistair grumbled. 

"Let us leave our dear Leah alone then" Zevran replied, gaze tracking her across the room and frowning as her friend intercepted her. Watching as Leah swallowed heavily and shook her head, bristled as the boy lowered his face closer to hers and the small smile that appeared on her face at his words. His imagination ran unchecked and he saw them in his mind's eye stealing away together to reconcile. While normally not one to deny another their fancies he found himself wanting to eliminate the boy. 

They left a short while later.


	13. Bad dreams and bad slaves

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some timeline flexibility ahead... muhahaha.

Leah's head ached and her body felt heavy and slow she’d dropped two mugs of ale and stared blankly into space for a half hour before Pol tapped her on the shoulder, startling her. 

"Home time for you, Da'mi. Tania's told me to make sure you get there" 

"Oh... Good. I feel wretched" Leah sighed. 

Pol brushed a strand of hair back behind her ear and nodded "there's something going around. Half the alienage is sick, we even have some healers that have come just to help.”

"That's good though right? About the healers I mean. Better than the usual treatment you get." 

"It... Is. Yes." 

"You don't sound sure." 

"I just wonder what the price will be" he replied grimly, "I know better than to think it won't come without one." 

"Pol" she chastised gently, "maybe it's just genuinely nice people." 

"There's no such thing. Now come on, Tania's glaring at me. That woman has a powerful glare." 

Leah stifled a laugh and let Pol gather and carry her things. Walking close as they made their way back to her lodgings. 

"I, ah... Will I see you in?" He asked hesitantly as Leah struggled with the lock. 

"Can you open it? Please? My eyes are blurred with this headache. Honestly I could cry it hurts so much." 

Pol gently took the key from her hand and unlocked the door, guiding her in and closing it behind them. Leah smiled and then sagged. Pol caught her and they half walked, half staggered to Leah's room. He helped her into the bed and took off her shoes. 

"Need anything?" He asked softly. 

"Ma'serannas, falon" she slurred sleepily. (Thank you, my friend) 

Pol's eyes widened “You know, Leah, it’s a bit odd that you’re using our language so frequently. I mean we don’t talk in it that much amongst ourselves and yet you – oh” he broke off, laughing softly at the soft snores coming from Leah. He knelt by her head long enough to press a kiss to her forehead before leaving. 

*

"Stop mooning boy, she's sick, not dead" Tania said, swatting at Pol with a dish rag. 

"But it's been three days" he replied, "people don't get sick for that long and don't need a healer." 

"Then take her to yours, boy." 

"They're only treating the alienage." 

"And since when did a healer of elves refuse humans? If you're worried, take her. If you're not, work. In either case get out of my kitchen!" 

Pol nodded and gave a mock courtly bow to the grumpy woman, then turned on his heel and left. Racing through the streets and working the lock on the door to Leah's lodgings quickly. No key needed. He entered her room and his heart dropped at the sight of her, pale and thinner, hair snarled. But beautiful to his eyes all the same. He tried to wake her but got only murmurs and sleepy sighs. Gathering her up he was saddened by how light she felt. He carried her carefully and quickly through the streets and into the alienage. 

His progress through the alienage was hampered by a crowd that stood near the vhenadahl. On the front step of a house Shianni stood, shouting for people to listen to her and to not trust the healers. Pol shouldered his way past the fringes of the crowd and sighed heavily when Shianni called to him by name. 

"She's sick, Shianni, she needs a healer" he said raising his arms slightly to indicate Leah. 

"They won't help her, Pol, and even if they did take her in, she's better off without them. Nobody has come out yet and it's been weeks. What sort of illness lasts weeks? Why can't we visit anyone in there? Have you thought of any of that?" 

In his arms Leah groaned and her eyes fluttered "Pol. Nuvenin... ma" (need you) 

Pol held her closer, lowering his head "Dareth, Da'mi." (be safe little blade) 

"Sorry to bust up the furious whispers you two, but we're drawing a crowd" Soris said quietly, falling into step beside Pol. 

Pol's glance flickered up and then back to Leah, shoulders hunching around her form as though shielding her from the dark mutterings around him. Few and far between, thankfully, bit still there. 

"Ma Halabi, Soris" (help me) he whispered. 

"Ah, fenedhis. Come on then," Soris clapped a hand to Pol's back and directed him through the crowd. As they approached the healers from Tevinter, Soris winked at him. 

"Don't worry Pol, the healers will take care of your betrothed" Soris said loudly, waving to the nearest man "Sir! Please! Another Elven lass in need of your help." 

The healer stood with his arms crossed, making no move to help. "What's wrong with her?" He asked dispassionately. 

"A fever, for three days now. She won't wake," Pol said quickly. 

The healer sighed and nodded, holding his arms out. Pol hesitated and an errant breeze lifted a snarled lock of hair revealing rounded ears. 

"Human?" The healer asked, "their healers are near the markets." 

"No!" Soris interjected "she's Elven, her ears were docked by her mother's mistress as a child. A noble who wanted a curiosity in her household." 

The healer looked at him askance. 

"Would my cousin be engaged to a Shem?" Soris asked, his tone derisive. 

Pol frowned, "Ir abelas, da’mi" he muttered (I'm sorry, little blade) 

"Ma melava halani" Leah called softly, eyes fluttering once more, voice trailing off with a sigh. 

"And she speaks Elvan" Soris said smoothly, eyeing Leah cautiously.

The healer reached for her again, "Fine. We can't have your betrothed staying ill then can we? I'll take her inside." 

"I could spare you the trouble, sir. She's not heavy" Pol replied quickly, grip tightening on Leah. 

"I'm afraid not, we're trying to contain this illness. Healthy people need to stay outside." The healer said with exaggerated kindness. 

"But she will be well soon? I can see her?" 

"We're healers, not slavers", the man laughed. His gaze scanning over Leah "she is a pretty thing, isn't she? But she looks so far gone... It might be too late already. Three days you said? Hmm, perhaps we shouldn't…" 

"Fine, fine, take her. Please. Make her well again." Pol said hurriedly, placing a kiss on Leah's forehead and carefully handing her over. 

Pol watched apprehensively as the healer entered the clinic and the door closed behind him.  
"Tell me I did the right thing” he said quietly, staring fixedly at the door.

Beside him, Soris inhaled deeply and made a helpless gesture with his hands, "well, it was uncertainty or death. I feel like uncertainty is the lesser of two evils here.”

"Thank you for helping. She's..." he trailed off and growled in frustration. 

"She's important. You said. I wish you'd choose an easy path for once, but we always knew you were destined for trouble when that Dalish mother of yours started giving you dagger lessons" Soris teased nudging Pol with his shoulder. "Come on, let's go mope somewhere where I can keep an eye on my trouble making cousin." 

They moved away and Pol felt every step like a cut. 

He formed a new routine. Wake early, visit the clinic and ask after Leah. Wait for an hour in hope of seeing her, go to work, come back and visit the clinic to ask after Leah. Wait until long after they'd closed their doors until finally Soris or Shianni dragged him away. 

"It's been a week" he muttered, pacing the floor of his uncle's house. 

"She did look really sick," Soris said quietly. 

"They're not healing anyone in there" Shianni spat, "if you love her, you'll come with me to get them out." 

"Peace, Shianni! We can't just storm the clinic!" Soris replied wearily, tired of this nightly circular conversation. He began to put out the plates they’d need for their evening meal.

"Well your Shem girl has friends in the city, Grey Warden friends you said. They could help" Shianni insisted, arms crossed tightly over her chest.

"A clinic is a lot different to a blight" Soris snapped, backing away from the table and heading into the tiny kitchen.

"Yeah one kills you and the other is a front to something shadowy" Shianni called after him, moving to the table and snatching out a chair.

"Maybe she's right" Pol said as Soris returned, "maybe her warden friends can help." 

Soris frowned and set their dinner down, distractedly lamenting that it was yet another watery stew, before saying "don't let her get to you, she's just mad at... well... everyone." 

"Soris!" 

"Well it's true, cousin" Soris retorted “are you two going to eat or not?” 

"It can't hurt to look, Soris" Pol said, his face lined with worry "Don’t you find it just a little bit odd that has come back yet? Have they really not been able to heal anyone?" 

"Let’s all just acknowledge that you hadn’t realised it either until they took your Shem girl. But, yes, I’ll admit it is starting to be suspicious.” 

"Finally!" Shianni said, throwing her arms up and then smiling grimly "come on, I'll help you find your Warden's." 

They made good use of the Elven gossip grapevine and found the group in Brother Genitivis house. Shianni, displaying her usual tact, burst in through the door unannounced then stopping dead in her tracks and sucking in a sharp breath. Pol, not expecting such a sudden stop, crashed into her back and pushed her further into the room.

"You killed him?" Shianni asked, voice high and tight.

"No! That's not him... That's someone else" Alistair said hurriedly.

"Someone else who you killed?" Shianni asked. 

"Someone else who was already dead. That's the real Waylon. We killed the fake one... Huh, that doesn't sound any better does it?" he mused looking to Leliana. 

"Right" Shianni said, reaching for Pol as she slowly backed away. 

"No wait, this isn't how it looks. I mean it is... I mean... Maker's Breath. Why are you here?" 

Pol shouldered past Shianni and told them about Leah and the healers and how nobody had emerged. How the clinic had been there nearly two weeks now. 

"We don't really have time to investigate a clinic" Aedan said, entering the main room from a side door and crossing his arms over his chest, "and Leah made it quite clear that she doesn't want us around." 

"I will go" Zevran said, standing and heading for the door. 

"As will I" Leliana said, shooting Aedan a dark look. 

Alistair sighed "I doubt she'll want me there, but I'm coming too." 

"Thank you, all of you" Pol said, grabbing Shianni’s hand and leading her out the door "it's this way." 

They moved quickly through the market square, entered the alienage and approached the clinic. Pol and Shianni moving quickly but checking back frequently to make sure Leah’s friends kept up. They paused only when Leliana called out to them, all of them huddling together for a moment while they quickly decided the best course of action was for Zevran to feign illness and gain entrance. As they entered the Alienage and came in sight of the clinic Zevran slumped between Leliana and Alistair, adding in the occasional moan of pain as they half carried, half dragged him over towards the nearest healer. The healers hesitated, protesting that healthy people needed to stay outside, but relented when Zevran made a show of coughing and hacking as though about to throw up. Pol trailed behind carrying their belongings. Once inside the clinic Zevran was released and Alistair quickly restrained the healer that had shown them in. The moved silently around the room looking for others and found no one.

"It's empty" Pol said in disbelief. 

"Maybe everyone is better?" Leliana replied. 

Pol shook his head "no, you don't understand, half the alienage came here for treatment. This place should be so full you couldn't move." 

"There's more to see then" Zevran said grimly, "though I'm not sure we're going to be pleased with what we find." 

They made their way through the grim and ghostly building. Some genuinely ill patients in beds with rudimentary healing apparatus nearby. A token effort at being a clinic. They nearly missed the hidden doorway at the back, but Zevran’s keen eyes caught it and they entered a long earthen tunnel leading down. 

"I can smell the Drakon river" Pol said uncertainly, "that can't be good." 

The pungent smell increased the further down they went and was soon joined by soft, almost ghostly murmurings and muffled sobs. 

"Creepy" Alistair muttered. 

The final twists and turns of the tunnel were littered with stacks of boxes, which seemed to contain supplies. "Food, blankets, water. Were they planning to heal with this or go on a journey?" Leliana asked quietly. 

Then they saw the cages. 

The ones they approached first were empty but showed signs of recent use. The sound of water increased and they turned the final corner to see more cages, this time full, and hear the healers herding people into boats. A steady line of healthy elves, hands tied behind their backs and mouths gagged with cloth being led into a boat. 

"Why aren't they fighting?" Zevran asked, disgusted. 

"We resign ourselves to the inevitable," Pol replied sadly. 

As though on queue a scuffle broke out in the ranks of those being led. A small dark-haired girl struggling and spitting out her gag. 

"Get your hand off of me or so help me God I may just let you love long enough to regret it!" Leah shouted indignantly. 

"Ah" Zevran hummed, "Leah is here." 

"Are you deaf as well as stupid? I said don't touch me!" Leah shouted, voice heavy with indignation. She kicked back at her captor, catching him in the knee and making him curse. As two more healers moved towards her Alistair drew his sword and stepped forward. 

"Sorry to interrupt this smuggling operation, but we're here for the girl... Actually, everyone. Let them go or stand and fight." 

A greasy healer tried to persuade them to pretend this hadn't happened. Offered gold and Leah to make them go away. Pol's heart plummeted when he saw Zevran smile and soared when the greasy healer died gurgling blood and a dagger in his throat an instant later. 

"Free your people" Alistair said quietly, "I doubt they'll appreciate human help right now." 

Pol nodded, catching Leah's gaze and touching his hand to his heart. Leah smiled at him and inclined her head before blowing him a kiss and turning to their companions. 

"Alistair Therein you are a sight for sore eyes. I'd hug you but I stink, really badly. Worse than you do normally." 

"You're welcome, Leah" Alistair replied dryly. 

"Leli, Zev, I'd kiss you both but... I'm not kidding, I really do stink." 

"A bath first then" Zevran purred, "and then when we're finished you can thank the others." 

"Saucy," Leah laughed. 

The only bright side to the whole affair was that all the elves left were a picture of health. They made their way quickly out of the clinic, gathering up the few sick left in the upper rooms. Before they left Leah sidled up to Pol, squeezing his hand before whispering softly to him. He froze and glanced at her, his gaze a mixture of sadness and longing, before nodding once and facing forward once more. Leah gently untangled her fingers from his, although it seemed that she did so reluctantly, and stepped back. The elves left the clinic first with Pol, Leah and the others last. Outside a crowd had gathered with Shianni at their head. They swarmed those exiting - families reuniting in tears and shouts and laughter. Others, unable to find their loved ones, lingered to the side or looked hopefully at the clinic door. The numbers of those who had returned were too few to the number who had entered. 

Leah was talking quietly to Alistair, his head tilted towards her as he listened, and he too nodded once when she'd finished. At last the crowd quietened. Pol stood beside Shianni and spoke to them all about what they'd found, how Shianni had been right and how they would need to work together to overcome the latest in another series of events that had befallen the Denerim alienage. When he was finished, Pol approached Alistair, Leliana and Zevran, thanked them for their help and then walked away without looking back.

Leah followed her friends out of the alienage. 

"I'll get my things" she said quietly, "that is, if I'm still welcome to tag along?" 

"Of course, but didn’t you want to say goodbye to your friend?" Alistair replied.

"Already did. Tensions between elves and humans are going to be particularly high after this, I thought it was best to keep it brief,” Leah said sadly.

"I see your point."

Leah nodded and continued on in silence. She was still subdued when she entered their camp that afternoon, settling her things down and slipping in to sit beside Alister on a nearby log. "Hey, you" she said quietly. 

"Lady Leah" he chuckled, nudging her with his shoulder. 

"Want to be my Knight?" She grinned. 

"Well I did just rescue you from slavers." 

"This is true. Thank you, Alistair. You didn't have to come, Maker knows I don't do a lot to make myself likeable to you, so, thank you" Leah said quietly, bumping her shoulder to his gently. 

"Well I did it more for your future owners really. You'd make a terrible slave" Alistair replied, sounding amused. 

"I really would. I'd instigate rebellion and spit in the soup." 

"I'm a hero three times over really" Alister quipped, counting off on his fingers "I save you from slavers, I save unwitting slave owners from you, annnd we rescued the alienage as well. I do good work." 

Leah smiled and shook her head, "yes, yes, you're a wonder of the age." 

Alistair basked and then gasped at the press of lips to his cheek. "What was that for?" He asked, startled. 

"For being you, and this is just because I want to” Leah said, catching Alistair in a brief hug.

Alister blushed and grinned "you know, if you want to do that again I'll be right here. Anytime. Always available to assist with any needs you have... wait, that sounded better in my head." 

Leah laughed and hugged him again whispering her thanks before moving away and walking directly into an armoured chest, taking a step back to balance herself. She sighed. 

"Aedan." 

"Leah." 

"Nice weather we're having. Warm." She rocked back on her heels, trying to look nonchalant.

Aedan nodded. "It'll be colder as we get closer to the Frostbacks," he replied. 

"Glad they live up to their name. Frosty." 

"Make sure you have warm clothes. I don't want to have to listen your whinging when you're cold" he replied, brow arching and arms crossing across his chest.

"I'll hug Alistair. He's warm" Leah replied. 

"Leah" Aedan replied, a warning tone in his voice. 

"What he is, you try hugging him and see." 

"Do I get a say? I don't want Aedan hugs," Alister piped up. 

"Aw Alistair, you might like it" Leah replied, glancing over her shoulder and smiling. 

Aedan rubbed at his forehead and sighed "yes, this is going to go really well, I can tell." 

"Wanna hug it out?" Leah asked impishly, spreading her arms slighty.

Aedan turned and walked away. 

"So that's a no?" She called after him while Alistair laughed.


	14. Let me walk you home

Leah looked sheepishly at Aedan "I already said we would." 

"Leah, we're in a blight and you want us to walk your boyfriend to meet the Dalish. Did it occur to you that we might have more important things to do?" 

"No, I thought with the abundance of free time you could take a relaxation course... Look, we're going that way anyways. Pol will just walk with us. You won't even know he's there." 

"Does Alistair know?" 

"He said to ask you. Honestly, it's like when your parents cop out and tell you to ask the other one." 

"And that analogy is weirder when you take into account how he looks at you" Aedan replied, his mouth twisting into a smirk. 

"Eww, yeah it does. You're a twisted man Aedan." 

"You won't win me over by distraction you know." 

"Me, distract you? From your noble duty to save the world? Never!" Leah replied, making a show of batting her eyelashes. 

"Leah." 

"Aedan." 

"You're annoying" he sighed, shaking his head. 

"I love you too" she grinned, blowing him a kiss as she walked away. 

* 

Pol and Leah walked together as they left Denerim, chatting and teasing by turns. Leah felt as though time was rapidly running out with him, a distant but lingering sense of finality. In her mind she pictured sand through an hour-glass and mentally rolled her eyes at how dramatic her imagination was being. Even so, she found herself delighting in Pol’s attention each day and looking forward to him sitting next to her each night at camp, drawing her into conversation, teasing her over little things to make her laugh, catching her attention with elvish phrases and remaining tight lipped on their meanings until she was nearly angry and then wrapping an arm around her shoulder and whispering the truth of them into her ear. 

"What are they doing?" Alistair asked Leliana one evening, watching closely as Leah talked to Pol. 

"Isn't it obvious? They're making the most of the time they have" she replied, smiling as Leah's laughter filled the night air. 

"He wants to join the Dalish and they won't welcome her," Alistair replied. 

"Exactly. And so they make memories now to remember each other by later. It's sweet, Alistair."

"She'll be hurt when he goes" Alistair huffed. 

Leliana sighed softly and shrugged a shoulder. "Maybe, but one day, when the hurt is gone the memory of laughter will be there and she'll remember a friend." 

Alistair watched on and looked forlorn, "not too well though, right? There'll be room for another?" 

Leliana patted his shoulder "yes Alistair, I'm sure there will be. As long as the other isn't a jealous and moody Warden now I'm sure there will be room for him." 

"I didn't mean that. I meant... In case... There was someone else and she... oh, never mind." 

"It's very good of you to be concerned," Leliana said lightly. 

Alistair groaned. "You're laughing at me." 

"A little. It's cute." 

"Cute? Cute! I'm not cute! I'm a fierce Warden and Slayer of darkspawn. I'm manly! Heroic!" 

"Yes of course. Excuse me for forgetting. Which reminds me, did you convince Wynne to darn your socks?" 

"Yes alright, that's enough out of you." 

Leliana grinned. 

*

The Brecilian forest loomed. It was also looked threatening, dark and foreboding. Leah stared at it for a long time in silence. 

"Copper for your thoughts" Pol said quietly. 

"It's like every dark, forbidding forest out of every story I ever read got together and became... This." She gestured to the area before them. 

"I'll admit, it's not what I was expecting" Pol replied, a frown tugging at his lips. 

"I mean, I don't want to put you off this idea, if it's what you want. But... Damn it's creepy looking" 

"Probably helps keep the shems out" Pol said giving her a crooked smile. 

"Huh, well, good point. Speaking as a Shem I have to say I'm getting the 'you are not welcome' vibes loud and clear." 

"Walk me home?" 

Leah took a deep breath and held it a moment before she nodded. After hearing Alistair’s stories of their first visit to the Brecilian forest Leah had been apprehensive about how long it would take to find them again. But this time they found them almost instantly, or rather, the Dalish found them. 

"Last time they shot at us," Alistair said conversationally to Pol as they walked, aware that their escorts were flitting through the shadows on either side. 

"This time they're just glaring. What an improvement" Pol replied, reaching for Leah's hand and hauling her closer to him as the toe of her boot hit a concealed rope and a deep, spiked pit revealed itself. 

"Maker's breath" she muttered, "ma serannas, falon." (thank you, my friend) 

"Careful, Da'mi, I like you better whole" Pol teased. 

Leah grinned and pecked his cheek and a sound of derision and harsh words came from their nearby guides. 

"Sal’dirtha?" Leah called. (say that again?) 

"Din, shemlan" came the reply (no) 

Pol grimaced and looked at Alistair, "I thought you said they liked you now?" 

"No, they tolerate us and don't shoot. That's about as far as it goes" he replied, eyes scanning their surrounds, "and I'm not sure how long the 'don't shoot' bit lasts, so Leah, if you could stop antagonising them, that would be best." 

Leah nodded and moved, putting space between herself and Pol once more, arching a brow in question when he stepped behind her and moved to her left a moment later – placing Leah between himself and Alistair. Pol shook his head in answer to the raised brow and they continued on in silence. 

"You could try telling them the docked ear thing," Leah whispered as they entered the camp. 

Pol smothered a laugh, "I don't think they'd fall for it." 

"Damn, it's going to have to be on charm alone then." 

"We're doomed" Alistair said, winking when Leah turned to him in mock outrage. 

"Alright, Warden Alistair, that's enough out of you" 

They entered the Dalish camp and felt the heavy, watchful gaze of the hunters as they waited for the Keeper to arrive. Alistair looked perplexed when a slender, dark-haired woman made her way towards them. She held an imposing looking staff and nodded her head in greeting as she neared.

"An'daran Atish'an, Warden. Keeper Marethari is busy at the moment and sent me instead." (Greetings, my place is safe) 

Alistair bowed in formal greeting, "Hello again, Merrill. We, ah, well... this is Pol and Leah" 

"Savhalla, Merrill" Leah said shyly, brightening when Merrill gave her a small smile. 

Pol looked stunned, "I... my... um..." 

"This is Pol, his mother was Dalish and he's left the alienage in hope that you'll take him into your clan" Leah said quietly. 

Merrill's eyes widened, "and you brought him here?" 

"I wanted to come" Pol said, "Please. I've always wanted to come, but my family... well, they're gone now. My mother and sisters, they were the only reason I stayed in the alienage." 

"You will be welcome, Pol. I know it." Merrill replied kindly. 

Pol looked overjoyed and turned to Leah, grinning madly. She scrambled through her emotions to quickly find joy and make it shine on her face. 

"Tuelanen ama na, sule sal harthir Pol. 'Ma'halla." Leah said trying not to blink for fear of tears spilling. (may creators protect you until we hear of each other again, Pol my dearest friend) 

"Ma serannas, Da'mi, 'ma'halla" he said, swiping a rogue tear from her face "dar'eth shiral, sal sura” (thank you little blade, my dearest friend, safe journey, come visit me again) his hand slid to her cheek and pulled her close until their foreheads met. "I will miss you every day." 

Leah wrapped her arms around him and hugged him hard "thank you for being my friend when I had none. I won't ever forget you, Pol. Be happy. Remember that I love you." 

Pol hugged her back hard "come back to me when you need me, I'll be right here" and with a kiss to her cheek they broke apart. 

"Ma serannas, Alistair" he said with a nod. 

"Good luck, Pol" Alistair replied. They watched as he walked away with Merrill and as the clan gathered to greet him. Leah sniffled quietly. 

"Come here" Alistair said kindly, wrapping an arm around Leah's shoulders. "I'm terrible at comforting people, they don't really teach us how to in the Chantry, which is funny when you think about it. So, I won't say anything and you can just pretend that you're helping me walk" 

Leah hiccupped a laugh "that's really sweet of you" 

"Have you been talking to Leliana?" Alistair asked as he steered them away from the camp and back towards where the others were waiting, "I'm not sweet and cute, I'm a manly heroic Warden. Wenches like you should swoon at the sight of me" 

"To say nothing of the smell" Leah teased, elbowing him in the side and wincing as she met armour. 

"See, that's what happens when you try to poke a manly armour wearing Warden" he said. 

Leah shook her head and threw a look over her shoulder. The camp had already fallen out of sight and she felt a pang of sorrow. "I’ll never see him again" she said softly, tears spilling down her cheeks. 

"Or, you might see him after this is all over" Alistair replied. 

"The Dalish don't stay in one place long." 

"I'd wait for you. He will too." 

Leah stopped and looked up at him through tear blurred eyes "Alistair..." 

He smiled sadly at her "What, it's true. It's not hard to wait for you, you know. It's not a boring thing to do. I'm happy to wait, Leah. Just... be happy. That's all I want for you. The thought of you happy makes me happy. I'm talking to much again aren't I? And now it's really the right moment is it? Argh." 

"Is it strange that I want to kiss you now?" She asked. 

Alistair straightened and made a show of strutting "no, because I've just finished telling you what a manly, heroic and handsome man I am." 

"Can I?" She asked, stopping him with a hand placed lightly on his chest. 

"Leah, I want to say yes more than anything. But..." He scuffed a hand through his hair and sighed, "you're sad right now. You've just said goodbye to a friend. Someone you love and will miss. So no, not now. But I really, really hope you'll ask again soon because my answer will be much different. This chivalry thing only lasts so long you know." 

Leah stood up on her toes and caught him in a brief, fierce hug. "Thank you, Alistair." 

"Oh sure, steal a hug without asking. Sneaky witch-thief." 

"Hey, you spent more time with Morrigan and her mother than I did." 

"You make that sound far lewder than it was." 

"Oh, so there was some lewdness?" 

"Leah" he growled, shaking his head and gently nudging her onwards once more.

"Alistair, you're making my maiden ears blush and then you growl at me?" She replied, linking an arm though his as they walked back through the forrest and pretending to ignore the Dalish scouts that hovered on the edges of the trail. 

"So, you and Pol never...?" 

"Was that really your only take away from that sentence?" 

"I can't help it! I heard maiden and I just... I was curious." 

"I'll never tell" Leah said, blushing furiously and concentrating on the path back out of the forest.

Alistair grinned and followed closely, "Oh, go on! Did you? I mean, it doesn't matter to me either way." 

"I should hope not! It has nothing to do with you" Leah said hotly. 

"So, you did." 

"No, actually, I did not. Not with anyone. Ever. There, happy now?" 

"I... well, I never have either" Alistair said shyly. 

"Never had the opportunity?" 

"Well, the Chantry isn't really a place for rambunctious young boys. They taught us to be respectful of beautiful women." 

Leah stopped mid step and turned sharply, hands raising to steady Alistair as he pulled up short in front of her. "Alistair, are you saying I'm beautiful?" 

He stared at her, his face filled with honesty and raw emotion, "Leah, I haven't been able to look away since I first saw you standing in the Korcari Wilds about to be slain by Genlocks. Yes, you're beautiful." 

"Are you still holding strong on that kiss avoidance?" 

Alistair tilted his head to the side for a moment in thought. "Ugh... yes." 

"Damn." 

He smirked. "At least until after dinner." 

Leah laughed, "I'll find you after. But I'm going to need details on how pretty I am." 

"I said beautiful, not pretty." 

"Yeah, you keep that up and see what happens." 

Alistair laughed and followed her back to camp.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It occured to me after I wrote this that Pol dies in DA2 and I got really sad and disliked Merrill for it even more.


	15. The strange things that happen at Chantries and Churches

Leah surveyed the chantry, taking care to avoid the blood splattered floor and bits of goo that now tarnished it. She hummed to herself in thought. "Weirdly," she said aloud, "this isn’t the strangest revamp of a church I've seen." 

"Church?" Alistair asked, somewhat distracted by cleaning his sword. 

"Why do you do that? Afraid you'll blood poison the next person you shish-kabob?" Leah asked, waving a hand to his task. 

"It's to protect the sword, not the next person I... wait, answer the church part. Then the shish-kabob." 

"Right. Well. Church is a house of God. A Chantry. And shish-kabob is meat on a stick." 

"I... I think I should just stop asking you to explain yourself" he sighed. 

Leah grinned, "Zev would love this story" she mused and turned on her heel. As though waiting for his queue, Zevran appeared through the side door. Lost scholar in tow. 

"I believe you were looking for this, and possibly me?" 

Leah winked at him "I always keep a sharp eye out for handsome assassins, Zev" and answered his smirk with a blown kiss. "Now come listen to my story. You'll appreciate it in ways that will only make Alistair blush." 

"Of course." 

"Hey!" 

"Anyway, I once went to this catholic school... umm, that’s a school run by the chantry… for girls only, very strict and prim... and it had-" 

"I'm sure it did not suit a lady of your spirits, my dear Leah" Zevran said, leaning back against a nearby doorframe and smiling indulgently. 

"Hated it. Buuuut it did have this old church that hadn't been used in years. One day my friend Katie finally gets into enough trouble that the school threatens to kick her out. Katie’s parents are desperate to see her stay, and they’re incredibly rich. They make a ‘donation’ of an Olympic sized swimming pool and brand-new gym, all within the old unused church. So now the pious place of worship is filled with scantily clad young females breathing heavily and sweating profusely. Beautiful." 

Leah watched closely, cackling remorselessly as Alistair turned red and stumbled. Zevran’s eyes lit up as he laughed. "My dear Leah" Zevran purred, "you do know how to tell scandalous stories in an entertaining fashion. I think you've broken our poor Grey Warden." 

"He's not broken, Zev, he's just blushing. The man has broad shoulders, he can take a story about scantily clad women breathing heavily... imagine if they said his name - I... oh... too far?" She grinned unrepentantly as Alistair made a hasty retreat, catching Zevran's eye and laughing. 

"You are a tease, Leah, and merciless to the dear boy" 

"Yeah, I know. I’d feel bad about it, but it’s just so entertaining." 

Before Zevran could reply a loud shout of her name brought a grimace to her face, "ah great, he’s gone and tattled to Aedan." 

The bellowing of her name a second time made her flinch. "Don't suppose you'd let me hire you, Zev?" 

"Alas, my Leah, that is a contract I failed to execute the first time. A second time would just be bad form. But you have my word that I will allow no harm to come to you." 

Leah huffed a sigh, "does that include wounded pride?" 

Zevran smiled and shook his head. 

"Thought not. Well, wont this be fun" and stomped towards the door, pausing only to shake herself and fall into a nonchalant saunter before stepping through, Zevran’s quiet hum of approval following. 

"You bellowed?" She called out, spotting Aedan just outside the Chantry doors, trying hard not to cower under Aedan’s glare. 

"What have you done to Alistair this time?" 

Leah glared back, her arms crossing defensively over her chest. "Nothing! Although, come to think of it, maybe that's the problem. He could do with some 'being done' couldn't he? Might make him easier to live with." 

Aedan sighed and scrubbed a hand over his face before striding forward, eyes flashing with anger. "Leah! This is hardly the time or the place for you to reduce the only other Grey Warden in Ferelden, during a blight might I add, to a blushing stammering mess! Stop it or leave. Your choice." 

"Fine" she muttered. 

"I mean it. Be nice to Alistair. I need him more than I need you" Aedan snapped. 

"Yeah, got it." Leah replied. Feeling small and crowded with him so close. From this distance she could feel heat radiating off him and see the drying blood on his armour. It was an all too visual reminder of how he was a seasoned fighter and she was not. 

He stared down at her hard for a long minute. Then shook his head "I don't get it, the fuss over you? You're pretty in your own way, but I don't understand why you make him flustered. I've seen more alluring faces in the brothels of Denerim and they're half the trouble." 

"Betcha you pay full price" Leah snarked, head tilting back and eyes flashing in challenge. 

Aedan arched a brow, "are you offering a discount?" 

"Wha- no, that wasn't. I meant you're the kind that HAS to pay! I wouldn't- I'd rather-" 

"Yeah, I know what you meant. See how it feels to be the stammering blushing mess?" 

"I'm not blushing!" 

"Of course you're not," he patted her head and walked away. 

"Hey. Hey! Don't you pat me like I'm your dog! I'm talking to you, you idiot hulking... ugh!! This isn't blushing! This is anger! You're just a meat sack too dumb to know the difference!" She scanned the ground before her and, finding an oversized pebble, picked it up and hurled it. Taking demented glee in the ping it made off his armour. 

Aedan stopped and visibly took a breath before turning around, his eyes crackling with anger. "You will not do that again, Leah" he said, voice hard and low.

"Oh yeah? I-" 

"I will see that it is finished" Zevran said smoothly, stepping between them. With a cursory nod to Aedan he wrapped an arm around Leah's waist and led her away. 

"Lovely Leah, you are far too lovely to die out here alone. Come, let us entertain one another while we wait for tempers to cool. I can think of far more... pleasing... ways to put that tongue to work." 

Despite herself Leah laughed. Grateful for the intervention and for the distraction. "Zevran, I like you a lot. More than you'd believe. But I don't..." 

"Stories, my Leah. I meant stories. Lewd Zevran will make your sides split with laughter." 

Leah sagged against him, "You're too good to me" 

"I know." 

She grinned "and far too beautiful, its cruel to make me keep my clothes on around such male perfection" 

"Ah yes, it is true. But you have angered our fearless leaders and now you must be punished, such is the way of things" Zevran replied, leading her around the Chantry and towards the shade of a nearby stretch of trees.

"Can you take your shirt off and let me ogle you?" Leah asked brightly. 

"But of course!" 

"Really?" 

"No" 

"Zev," she wheedled. 

Aedan watched them go. Ears burning, hands clenched and eyes glued to the retreating figures of Zevran and Leah. He forced himself to take long, deep breaths through his nose as he sternly told himself he did not find her attractive. He reminded himself that she was annoying and irritating, her constant need to make a joke out of everything was dangerous and foolhardy. He should leave her in the next town they came to and get on with their mission, perhaps then, once she was out of sight for a few days, the urge to pin her against something and kiss that smart mouth into submission would fade. He tightly reigned in thoughts that wondered what sounds she'd make as he did, and what her response would be, burying them deep and slamming a door shut on the before he turned the opposite way and returned to camp.


	16. Aw a dragon, can we keep it?

Leah lagged behind while Aedan and Alistair spoke with Brother Genitivi, eyes lingering on the markings that lined the heavily worn temple door. She startled at a hand on her shoulder and spun, eyes wide. Smiling at Brother Genitivi when he apologised for startling her before returning to the markings. 

“Child, what do you make of these markings?” Brother Genitivi asked, his brow furrowed.

Leah hummed slightly under her breath “I’m trying to figure out if it’s real, or just a story. It seems a bit far-fetched. Have you read it before?”

“You can read it?” Genitivi asked, startled.

“Um, yes? Can’t you?”

“No, child. These markings are indecipherable, not just to me, to any scholar that I know of.”

“It’s Leah, not child” Leah replied distractedly, attention once again on the markings. “I think it’s story.”

Brother Genitivi looked agitated and frowned at her for a moment before trying to pull her away from the doors. “It’s impossible, nobody can read these markings. I ask that you kindly go away and stop interfering with my work.”

“Hey, hands off” Leah snarked, stepping back.

“Is everything alright?” Leliana asked, approaching with Aedan and Alistair in tow.

Brother Genitivi waved a hand dismissively at Leah “your friend is pretending to read ancient markings.”

“I’m not pretending!” Leah replied hotly.

“Go on then, Leah. Read them to us” Aedan said, watching her intently.

Leah exhaled heavily and rubbed a hand over her reddening cheeks, “I’m not lying, Aedan.”

“Leah, you’re many things, but a liar doesn’t appear to be one of them. Read it. Please.” Aedan replied.

Leah stepped closer, shaking her head and muttering under her breath. “Fine. It’s a story. It’s talking about the journey of Havard as he carried the Sacred Ashes of Andraste from Tevinter. Andraste named Havard ‘Aegis of the Faith’ and that he heard her divine song leading him here to the lands of the Alamarri tribes. When he arrived, she appeared to him in a vision and told him to build this temple as a house to her remains and to house those who would protect them. That’s it. Hey, do you think if I sing to Alistair he’ll build me a house?” Leah turned to face them once more, eyes widening at the looks of astonishment that met her “whoa, what did I say?”

“Leah” Alistair choked out, “you’re saying this is it. This is really the Temple we’re looking for?”

“I… think so, yes. I mean it’s old, and maybe they moved things around and there’s no map or anything, but yeah. This is a real temple of Andraste” Leah replied, a hesitant smile flickering over her lips.

“This is astonishing” Leliana said reverently, eyes wide and fingers brushing the markings with reverence.

“How can you possibly read those markings?” Genitivi asked, brow furrowing.

Leah looked at him and shook her head slightly, “I wish I could tell you. I couldn’t at first, not properly, but then I sort of traced them with my fingers and it’s like the meaning just flooded into my head. I could see the story, not in words, but in pictures.” 

“You are blessed, child.” 

“It’s Leah. Lee-ah. Not child.” said Leah, lips twisting down in a thoughtful frown, “and what a strange blessing.”

Genitivi dug around in his pack and pulled out a small book, opening it and quickly thumbing through it to pages that contained runes and markings that looked old and strange. “And what do you make of this?” he asked, handing it over.

Leah frowned at the pages for a long moment, squinting at the shapes. Sighing and shaking her head “No, I’m sorry, nothing. I guess it was just a one-time thing – oh!” her breath caught as her thumb brushed over the runes. In her mind it felt like a lightbulb flaring and then exploding as the meaning of the markings flared to life for her. She was aware of someone calling her name and a warm presence by her side, holding her steady. She shuddered and blinked hard, the room and its occupants taking shape before her once more. Alistair stood at her side; arm wrapped around her to hold her close.

“This one is horrible” she breathed out heavily, leaning into him.

“It’s thought to be a reference to the first blight and-“ Genitivi began, stopping abruptly at Leah’s shake of her head.

“Not quite. It’s more to do with the Anvil of the Void that Paragon Caridin made. They used it during the First Blight to create golems” she swallowed heavily, “but, like this says, you can’t make a living creature out of non-living materials. So, they asked for volunteers and when the volunteers stopped coming, they sent prisoners and people they didn’t particularly like. This is almost like a confession from Caridin, he was so ashamed of his creation.”

“How do you know?” Aedan asked, “I believe you, but how do you know he was ashamed?”

Leah huffed out a breath and gave a weak smile “I can feel it in the words. I can almost see him sitting at a desk, writing them out by lantern light. Hastily. He knows that his defiance is going to cost him, but he’s determined to get the words out.” Leah handed the book back, all but shoving it at Genitivi, and dusted her hands off once it was gone. “Well, that was terrifying. Let’s move on shall we? Zev, Morrigan, hurry up!”

They moved through the icy temple ruins as quickly as possible, mainly to try and keep warm. Leah was almost grateful for the amount of Cultists they found inside and the distraction they provided from the images still in her mind. She shivered involuntarily and could only muster up a flicker of a smile to Zevran’s teasing before becoming lost in her thoughts once more. The entire way through the temple and the caverns beyond were somewhat of a blur for her and only when the cold, cutting breeze of the mountain top ruffled her hair into her face did she fully wake up. Beside her, her friend’s faces were tilted to the sky as they watched a dragon fly overhead and then land, settling itself in a sunny space and curling up for a nap.

“Well, that does complicate things” Aedan said dryly.

"Let sleeping dragons lie, I say" Leah said nervously 

Aedan flicked a look at her, "Who brought the non-combatant?"

Alistair sighed "I did. It was that or leave her alone and... Well... Hindsight it a beautiful thing" 

"Hey, I've helped! Daggers, see them?" 

They edged past the sleeping dragon, moving very, very slowly. No one speaking, and everyone breathing very shallowly and softly until they reached the other side of the clearing and slipped past the door of yet another temple. 

“Anything to these markings, Leah?” Aedan asked, pointing towards the doors as they past.

Leah grimaced and shook her head “Nope, those are just dragon claw marks. Comforting, right?”

“Not really” Leliana said quietly, catching her gaze and shivering.

Leah opened her mouth to reply and then shut it with a click. Before them stood an impossibly still figure. As they approached it moved and greeted them, introducing itself as a Guardian. Their group was still rattled enough by the cultists and dragon that a Guardian made of whispy light was a bit of a non-event. 

The Guardian looked at Leah, "you are a long way from home and you wonder why you are here" 

"Wow, does it get better than this? Cause right now you're at telephone psychic level," she snapped. 

"Language is the great barrier in many lands, it alienates and divides. You are one who treasures the differences and while you stop long enough to listen you draw threads of the future together," the guardian continued. 

"Okay fine, market psychic." She thought for a bit and added, "in a branded tent." 

The Guardian ushered them into the Temple and they began the Trial of the Faithful. Leah hanging back and avoiding touching things as much as possible, fearful of more stories seeping into her brain. Now that she was aware of the ability she could see markings everywhere and her anxiety rose. She tucked her arms into her sides and followed closely behind Alistair.

When they arrived at the ashes and read the part about flames she shook her head and backed away. "Let me know how it works out for you all" she said, returning to the previous room to wait, only stopping at Alister's hand on her shoulder.

"Will you wait?" 

"Only for you" she replied, smiling softly at him.

His answering smile made her duck her head self-consciously and tug at a loose piece of hair. She coloured when she heard his soft huff of laughter and swatted at him playfully. "Go and get naked with your friends. Wow, that sounds so wrong." 

"Don't go far" he said, biting back laughter. 

"And miss a chance at peeking? Not on your life." 

Alistair leant closer "I'll give you a private viewing later if you like." 

Leah blushed harder and stammered "you... Good. I - I look forward to it. Maker's breath. Have you been talking to Zevran? Where's this confidence come from? I mean I'm not complaining, at all." 

"Alistair," Aedan growled "hurry up." 

Alistair winked at her and watched her steadily as he started to undo the straps of his armour. Leah made a show of watching calmly, fidgeting when he got down to his shirt and began to tug at the cord holding up his pants. She gulped and turned away, muttering. 

"See you soon" he whispered, voice heavy with laughter. 

"Uh huh, you and your clothes. Soon." 

And then he was gone. 

Zevran had to be behind this new confidence in him, Leah was sure of it. She mentally gnashed her teeth and hated him for turning the tables against her... And then silently thanked him endlessly for the same thing. The moment felt complex and long lasting, though she still jumped out of her skin when a she felt a tap on her shoulder a moment later. She closed her eyes tightly. 

"You, ah, are dressed... Right?" 

Alistair chuckled and guided her around. Leah was grateful to see that he wore once more wore pants and a thin shirt. 

"Hey, you. How was it?" 

"We found the ashes, Leah. It was... Amazing. And we can cure the Arl and stop the blight and then... Actually, I don't know what happens then." 

"Lazing about? Swimming in the sea? A trip to Orlais to eat fancy cheeses?" 

"All of those things" he said, smiling softly "although I'm too Ferelden to admit wanting to go to Orlais." 

"We'll just use them for their cheese and laugh at them once we leave." 

"I like the sound of that." 

"Well you're Ferelden, laughing at Orlais is a national pastime." 

He moved closer and tucked a piece of hair behind her ear, fingers lingering on her cheek "that's true, but I meant that I liked the sound of 'us'." 

Leah's heart rate kicked up a notch "you're getting very good at this" she breathed. 

He grinned and ducked his head, catching her gaze "I've spent a great deal of time thinking about it." 

"Happy thoughts?" 

His eyes crinkled with a smile, "yes." 

"Care to share?" She asked, surprised at how breathless her voice sounded. 

"They usually involve this" he breathed, drawing her closer and leaning in to brush his lips softly to hers. Leah's breath caught and she froze in surprise for a moment, then leaned in, her hand resting against his chest. She could feel his rapid heartbeat against her palm and that, combined with the tenderness of the kiss, overwhelmed her and she shivered. Alistair's free hand rose in response, wrapping around her waist to hold her close. 

"Alistair, how long does it take to collect one annoying girl - oh" 

They startled apart at Aedan's intrusion. Leah ducking her head into Alistair’s chest to hide. She felt him turn slightly, arm still around her waist. 

"We're right behind you, Brother" he said happily. 

"Riiight, very believable. Come on, let's go cure the Arl."


	17. It’s not my party but I can still cry

(Party banter)

"You're doing it again" Leliana said. 

"What, walking? I don't know if you've noticed, Leliana, but we do a lot of that" Alistair replied. 

"Oh, that certainly explains how we got to Denerim and then back here to Redcliffe. But I meant the staring." 

"Ah so you did notice! Wait, what about staring? Who's staring?" 

"You are. At Leah. Quite a lot actually. Especially when she's in front of you." 

"Well I'm making sure I don't walk into her. She's little, I'd hate to push her over accidentally." 

"Oh, I see, interesting that Aedan is also in front of you and you're not staring at him." 

"Aedan is big enough to look out for himself." 

"But Leah is small." 

"Yes." 

"And pretty." 

"Ye-es." 

"And you like her." 

"Leliana, was this just to get me to say that I like Leah?" 

"Yes." 

"Well then, yes." 

Leliana smiled and Leah laughed out loud, turning briefly to blow a kiss in their direction. 

"That was for me, you know" Alistair said smugly. 

"Yes, Alistair." 

*

Leah and Leliana walked arm in arm into Redcliffe, joking about how Leah should pick out which rock she’d be sleeping on tonight. Given their last encounter with the Arlessa it seemed like good forward planning to Leah and she was surprised when Alistair got upset at the idea.

“It wouldn’t be that big of a surprise,” Leah said with a shrug.

“None of us are staying if you’re not welcome” Alistair replied firmly, staring at Leah until she nodded her agreement before moving on ahead.

Leliana nudged Leah’s side and grinned widely, both of them breaking into quiet laughter when Leah pretended to swoon over decisive-Alistair. Morrigan’s disdainful snort only made them laugh harder, eventually putting their heads together and gossiping quietly as they walked through the town towards the castle.

Alistair insisted on being the one to address the Arlessa, leaving her with no choice but to address her thanks to him as he handed over the ashes. Leah noticed the discomfort this brought the woman and felt smug and warm inside at Alistair’s unwavering politeness and flawless manners, catching his eye as turned and giving him a nod of acknowledgement, hoping he could see the pride in her eyes.

There was a moment of hesitation when someone asked how the ashes were supposed to work. They called for the castle’s healer and Mother Hannah from the Chantry. The two women huddled closely together and debated on the best way to administer the ashes. Eventually they came up with a ceremonial way of anointing the Arl, the particulars kept between those in the room. Within moments the Arl was reported as being awake and well, as though he’d never been ill in the first place. Shortly after there was news of a party to celebrate and the offer of rooms to the Grey Wardens and their companions. The offer was later updated to clearly state exactly which companions were welcome and Leah blinked when her name was included.

“Let me get this straight, Wynne, Sten, Morrigan and Zev get to go and stay at the tavern in town and I’m stuck here in Castle Demonspawn with you lot? How exactly does that work?” Leah asked crossly looking forlornly after their departing friends and blowing a kiss in return to Zevran’s flirty wink.

Alistair gave her a crooked smile “you wouldn’t leave me here alone would you?”

“Well, you’d have Leli and Aedan.”

“I’m honestly surprised they bothered with separate rooms,” Alistair said, catching Leah’s hand and holding it in his own.

Leah laughed, “look at you being all forward and understanding of their relationship. What happened to blushing-at-the-Pearl-Alistair?”

Alistair coloured slightly and ducked his head to speak softly in her ear “perhaps he disappeared in favour of slightly-jealous-Alistair.”

“Oh you want to share with Aedan too? Or are you more of a Leliana man?” Leah asked, eyes bright with laughter.

Alistair groaned and rested his forehead to Leah’s, staring fixedly at her “very funny, Leah.”

“I wanted to say it earlier but didn’t get the chance. I was so proud of you earlier, talking to the Arlessa like that. I know it can’t have been easy for you” Leah said, running her fingers over his cheek softly.

Alistair sighed and leant into her touch “Thank you. I… wanted to do it, mainly for you because I know it’s important to you, but then I realised it felt good to have her acknowledge me. Maybe that’s petty of me, I don’t know.”

“Sounds perfectly reasonable to me. I’m still not a fan of hers, I mean what’s not to like about you?”

Alistair huffed a laugh and raised her hand, kissing it gently. Leah felt her cheeks heat in response, and she moved closer a smile playing on her lips. Before either of them could say anything further they were interrupted by someone clearing their throat. Alistair looked up towards the sound and straightened.

“Arl Eamon, my apologies we didn’t hear you approach” he said, lowering Leah’s hand but still keeping it tucked in his own.

The Arl gave Alistair an indulgent look, “more pleasantly engaged, I see.”

The comment made Leah frown and then quickly hide it. The words themselves were fine, but the way they were delivered made her uncomfortable. A ripple of unease washed through her and she questioned its source. The Arl appeared neatly dressed and completely composed, the very picture of a kind, if slightly aloof, Lord. If Alistair had picked up on the delivery than he gave no sign of showing it and smiled.

“May I introduce you to Leah Serano, she helped find the Temple of Sacred Ashes and has been a loyal and valuable companion” Alistair said, the pride in his voice making Leah thrill a little bit inside and giving her the courage to smile brightly.

“Very pretty” the Arl said in a kindly, dismissive manner, “I was hoping to spend some time with you before the festivities. It’s been some time since we were all together here at the castle after all.”

Inwardly Leah arched a brow and scathingly asked if they’d be visiting old haunts like the dog kennels, but outwardly she turned to Alistair and smiled while squeezing his hand. “That’s my queue to leave. I’ll see you tonight.”

Alistair looked torn and then grateful, gaze flicking to Eamon and back again before he nodded. “I’ll keep my eye out for the prettiest woman there.”

“I’ll fight her for you” Leah whispered back teasingly, reluctantly releasing his hand and watching as Alistair approached Eamon and they entered the castle side by side.

“I’ll fight you too, Eamon” she muttered under her breath, turning and making her way back to her room.

*

Leah stared at the dress that had been delivered to her room and hung up to allow her to view it. The garment was a masterpiece of misery and a tribute to all the ugly things in the world. It was a sickly green-brown, it had the shape of wet paper bag and it was at least three sizes too big for her slender frame.

“Well played, Isolde. You could teach a masterclass in High School level bitchiness” Leah said quietly to herself as she moved around the dress, viewing it from all angles just to really get an understanding of dreadful it was. She quietly wondered if there was any way she could pull a Hollywood movie ‘with a pair of scissors and a montage, hey presto the dress is fashionable!’ scene out of it, but it seemed highly unlikely. With a sigh she pulled the dress off its hanger and set off in search of the most fashionable woman she knew.

Leah knocked on the door and waited, smiling broadly when it opened. "Leliana! You look stunning. Aedan is going to explode when he sees you." 

Leliana laughed, her hand running down the bodice of a jade green dress as she stepped back to let Leah in, "I hope he'll admire me first." 

"They gave me this," Leah said holding out the dress in her hand "and it looks dreadful. Can you help?" 

Leliana helped her try the dress on and stood back, frowning "who gave this to you? Have they never seen you? It's far too wide and long." 

"I know. The Arlessa sent a servant. An elven girl, who apologised as she handed it over. I can see why now." 

"Do you think they'd help you if you asked?" 

"I get the impression they'll get in trouble. I don't want that for them over the sake of a dress." 

"Well... We could ask for pins. Or if Morrigan has some magical solution or we could help ourselves to something more suitable," Leliana plucked at the dress and frowned so deeply that even Leah could tell she thought the dress was a lost cause.

"Or I could just not go. I'm starting to think that's the option for me" Leah replied, reclining back on Leliana’s bed and admiring the large room and it’s dramatic view of the cliffs.

"And leave Alistair alone?" 

"He's a grown man, Leli, he'll be fine." 

"A handsome grown man who is also the Grey Warden who found the cure for the Arl. I'm sure that won't make him an enticing dance partner for the young ladies of Redcliffe." Leliana replied teasingly.

"He can dance with whomever he likes" Leah said uncomfortably, fingers plucking at the bed cover and mouth twisting in distaste. 

"I'll tell him you said so." 

"Good... Fine..." She replied, shimmying out of the oversized dress and back into her own clothes once more. "You look wonderful, Leliana. Really. Have a lovely time." 

"Oh Leah, wait. Please!" Leliana called as Leah slipped from the room and made her way back down to her own room. Leah resisted the urge to throw the dress and instead hung it lopsidedly on a hanger then threw herself into a threadbare chair, staring gloomily out of the small window it faced and watching as the night darkened and sounds of a party began. Eventually her stomach rumbled and she made her way out to the nearby kitchens, stealing a chicken leg from a passing tray carried by an elven man, who fixed her with a hard look and muttered under his breath.

"Tel'abelas" she called back, biting into the stolen food. (I'm not sorry) 

"Len'alas lath'din" the man growled back. (dirty, unloved child) 

"Yeah, fine, you can have that one" she muttered darkly, leaning back against the wall and biting into the stolen chicken leg. 

"Maker's Breath Leah, is it completely impossible for you to avoid trouble for an entire day?" An exasperated voice asked from behind her. 

"A day is a long, long time, Aedan,” she replied between bites.

"For you it seems. Why aren't you dressed?" 

"I am! Unless this is one of those naked dreams... in which case what are you doing here?" 

Aedan flushed slightly "for the dance, Leah" he said sternly. 

"Ah, well my social calendar was full, I had to decline” Leah made an airy gesture, accidentally losing the chicken leg in the process, sparing it a sad look as it sailed through the air only to be retrieved a moment later by Barkspawn with a happy woof. “Hey, chicken bones are bad for you.”

"In favour of stealing chicken legs and trading insults with servants?" 

"Busy, busy." 

"And what's the real reason?" He asked, the gentleness in his time surprising Leah enough to look up. 

"Oh, wow. Aedan, you look really handsome. I hope you've seen Leliana, she's beautiful." 

Aedan's lips twitched "thank you and yes, I have. Now answer the question." 

"Ugh, it's just... it's stupid. Okay? I don't want to go and it's stupid and they brought me a dress that doesn't fit and it's fine. I get it. Leah is annoying so let's make her feel bad. Hilarious. Are we done here?" 

Aedan's gaze softened further "no, Leah, we're not." 

"Hooray," she said sarcastically. 

"Show me the dress." 

"It won't suit you." 

"Leah." 

She sighed, slapped a hand to her thigh for Barkspawn to follow and pushed past him, opening the door to her room. 

"Why is your dress in a servants room? Oh... I see. The Arlessa really is a..." He sighed. 

"Era'harel?" Leah offered.

"Do I want to know?" 

"Demon." 

Aedan flashed her a grin "yeah, that's fair." 

He stepped out into the hallway and stopped a servant girl returning to the kitchens "miss, would you get a dress for Warden Alistair's companion? Something that fits." 

The elven girl stared at Aedan and then smiled at Leah "wait right here" she said and turned to run down the hallway. 

"She'll get in trouble you know," Leah said glumly, crossing her arms over her chest as she leant back against the wall, giving a small smile to Barkspawn as he lept up onto her bed and flopped down with a groan.

"I'll make sure she doesn't," Aedan replied, his expression gentle.

"Thank you." 

"Sethan." 

Leah turned her head and beamed at him "Vin! Very good, Aedan!" 

Aedan huffed and gave her a sardonic smile "you're so easily pleased." 

"Shh you're spoiling the moment." 

The servant returned and ushered Leah inside her room while Aedan leant against the wall with his arms cross across his chest, waiting. He was surprised when a short time later the door opened and someone nudged his arm, he cast a sideways look down, expecting to see the servant, and his breath caught. Leah smiled crookedly up at him. 

"It fits," she said 

"I can see that," he replied taking time to look at just how well it fit. 

"It's um, it's red" Leah said lamely. 

"And tight" and Aedan replied. 

"Um, yeah." 

"Ready?" 

"Nope." 

"Too bad, pretty girl" he replied catching her arm up in his and marching her to the party. 

Leah hesitated as they approached the ornate doors, her feet fumbled and she tripped. Aedan sighed as he caught her and fixed her with an exasperated look. Leah gave him a trembling smile. 

Aedan leaned in close, "Be brave, little blade, the wolves can smell fear." 

"Who told you...?" 

Aedan looked smug "dance with me and I'll tell you." 

"Ha, well, shockingly I don't know how to do Thedas dances." 

"Thankfully you have me to lead you." 

"Leliana will-" 

"Understand and wait." 

They entered and Aedan twirled her deftly. Leah was too surprised to resist and the manoeuvre looked practiced and graceful. She shot Aedan a look and he winked at her, his gaze openly appreciating her before drawing her close once more. "Beautiful" he breathed, his breath warm against her cheek. Leah's head tilted towards him in response and a smile twitched on her lips. Aedan hummed his approval of her reaction "perfect" he said softly, placing a hand on her lower back and pressing her closer with gentle pressure, making Leah's breath catch. 

"Aedan..." she murmured, her right hand raising to rest gently on his chest. Feeling his heartbeat kick up a notch as she stepped closer still, "What are we doing?" 

He leant in, closing the last of the narrow space between them, and Leah's heart skipped a beat "making memories. Helping Alistair. Finally giving in." 

"Oh… I don't understand." 

He brushed wisps of hair from her temple "I'd explain, but, I want this. This dance. These moments. Just for me, and then... Well, we'll deal with 'then' soon." 

Leah lifted her hand and traced her fingers along his jaw and down his neck, smiling.

Aedan's smile was dazzlingly bright and he caught her hand and kissed the palm, never breaking eye contact. Leading her in a dance that started as they moved to join the other dancers. Leah's attention narrowed down to exclude everyone but the man before her, she didn't fight his lead or blush at his touches. Instead she leant into him and brushed against him, filing every touch away, every turn and step, every soft look and every softly breathed word of praise he gave her while breathing her own in response. Beautiful. Handsome. Perfect. Brave. Funny. Clever. Wanted. Loved. His gaze softened “loved” he said, saying it back to her. He sighed as though a weight had fallen from him. "Thank you, Leah” he smiled, and the dance was over. 

Aedan walked arm in arm with her towards a knot of people, looking through them to catch the eye of someone and grinning. "Brother" he said in acknowledgement as Alistair broke free of the knot and approached them. 

"That certainly caught some eyes," he replied good naturedly. 

""Tel'abelas" Aedan said, winking at Leah before walking away.

"Dance with me" Alistair said, fixing his gaze on Leah. 

"Yes." 

"Oh, I wasn't asking, I feel all possessive after that display" Alistair said, leaning in to kiss her forehead as he caught her hand. 

Leah flushed and raised her hand to his cheek, cradling it "you are all I want." 

"That's a good start" he said, smiling at her "you look breathtaking by the way. No wonder it took you so long to get ready." 

"Ah... yes. Sorry about that." 

"I've already told you, I'm happy to wait. I'll wait forever for you, Leah." 

"I don't want to keep you waiting anymore." 

His eyes lit up with joy and he led her into a dance, their steps less perfect and more joyous, their smiles filled with laughter as they stumbled steps and gently bumped each other. A different sort of breathlessness stole over Leah and she felt happy. Loved. Whole. 

"How did you Aedan make this look elegant?" Alistair complained. 

Leah laughed and ducked her head to his shoulder and slid her hands around his neck. "I have no idea; this is more fun though." 

Alistair held her close, pressing his cheek to the top of her head as they gave up on the steps the others were dancing, enjoying each other's nearness. "Would you be disappointed if we left?" he asked softly. 

"Not at all." 

"I just... we never get any time to ourselves. Is it selfish of me to want that?" 

Leah sighed and leant into his embrace. "Is it selfish to want a break from the blight and the constant saving the country and odd tasks along the way? Umm... No, I think it's allowable. For a while. A day? A night?" 

"A night" Alistair said quietly, stepping back slightly to look longingly at her. "A night with you." 

"How forward" she teased gently, "I'd love that." 

They stopped any pretence of dancing and stood in tight embrace, gazes warm and lingering and smiles only for each other. Leah caught movement in her peripheral vision and bit her lip as she realised who was approaching. Alistair hadn't seen or hadn't realised and groaned softly, eyes zeroing in on Leah, "we should go, now, I-" 

"Alistair. We need to finish our conversation from earlier. I wondered if you'd have some time now?" Arl Eamon asked. 

Leah felt Alistair’s arms tighten on her. "I'd be happy to speak with you tomorrow, Arl Eamon, tonight is celebrating your health after all. Seems a shame to bring politics into it." 

"Nonsense, my boy. Important matters need to be discussed that can't wait." 

"Warden Alistair," Leah said quietly but firmly. 

"I beg your pardon?" 

"Given. And it's Warden Alistair, not 'my boy'." 

Eamon fixed Leah with a cold glare, "Young lady this is hardly the time to be speaking to your betters-" 

"That's enough" Alistair cut in, "Leah, excuse me." 

Leah stepped back, hurt flashing on her face before she could catch and hide it. Alistair reached for her and she gave him a sad smile "don't worry about it." 

Alistair’s gaze raked her from head to toe and back again, "you really do look so beautiful." 

Leah nodded and stepped back before turning and walking away. She'd lost her bearings during the dance and grumbled inwardly as she realised she was walking away from the exit rather than towards it. Not feeling up to cutting across the dance floor she instead weaved her way through the crowd at the edges of the room. Smiling politely but coolly to those who offered greeting and a murmured "thank you, no" to the few offers of dancing. She was within range of the door when a firm hand on her shoulder stopped her. 

"Forgive me, my lady. But you seem upset. Can I help?" 

"Thank you, no" she replied automatically, looking up and blinking in surprise "Bann Tegan. Hello." 

He smiled at her "Hello, Leah. Not dancing?" 

"I was just leaving." 

"So soon? I'm sorry to hear it. Can I persuade you to stay?" 

"I'm sorry but no, I'm very tired and-" 

"Just one dance?" He asked his voice wheedling, "we did survive the attack on Redcliffe together, it would be nice to talk you under more pleasant circumstances." 

"I... Ah..." Leah huffed a laugh "I can't really turn you down when you say it like that. A dance would be lovely, thank you." 

Leah took his offered arm and backtracked to the dance floor, allowing herself only one fond glance over her shoulder to see the door that had been so tantalisingly close. Tegan place his hand on her waist and Leah suddenly felt shy. She barely knew the man and dancing was suddenly feeling too intimate for comfort. There wasn't the familial and turbulent love and affection she had with Aedan or the romantic love and deep-seated longing she felt for Alistair. This was a stranger. She subtly put space between them and looked uncertainly at him. 

Tegan smiled warmly, "don't look so worried. Unlike our dear Alistair I know how to dance." 

Though she was sure he meant it as kind teasing, Leah couldn't help but bristle "perhaps the dogs weren't able to teach him" she said quietly. 

"Ah so he's told you that story," Teagan replied and conversation between them ceased momentarily as they started to dance. 

"After a fashion, yes." 

"Did he make you cry over the poor orphan boy sleeping alone?" 

"No, I assure you I didn't cry." 

"It wasn't as ba-" 

"I hadn't finished, Bann Tegan. I didn't cry, I felt immensely ashamed that grown men who had power and wealth at their disposal had behaved so despicably towards a little, parentless boy." She sucked in a breath "there, now I'm finished. You were saying?" 

Tegan stared at her for a long moment in silence and then threw his head back and laughed, loudly enough that people stared and started to whisper. "All that fire and you chose Alistair. What a waste. Although I can see why he likes you, you're everything he's not... But you... You are a different creature altogether. How the Cousland boy must hate that you got away." 

"Aedan is like a brother to me" she said fiercely. 

"Dear girl, brothers do not dance with sisters the way Aedan danced with you. Lie to yourself all you like." 

"Did you ask for this dance just to insult me?" Leah asked, feeling herself go ridged with anger.

"No, to warn you. Eamon wants to make a king out of Alistair and that leaves no room for you. You will never be queen. I've been sent to give you a friendly piece of advice... Choose someone else." 

"What?" She replied, dumbfounded. 

"Choose Aedan, choose your Elven friend, choose me if you like. But choose someone else." Tegan said, still smiling, still leading her in the dance. 

"I need to go" she said stepping away and making a noise of protest as Tegan swept her back up. 

"Don't make a scene and don't he angry. This isn't personal, it’s just politics. I happen to like you quite a lot. You're pretty. Spirited. You're just not going to be a queen." 

"I don't want to be one," she snapped, "and as far as I know Alistair doesn't want to be king" 

"Oh, Eamon will be the real king. The boy just has the blood. He'll be a figurehead while Eamon does the thinking for him," Tegan replied as though it was the most obvious scenario in the world.

Leah remained silent after that. When the dance ended she broke away quickly "thank you, Bann Tegan. That was... educational" and made her way to the door. 

"Leave me alone," she snapped when Aedan tried to stop her "please... I can't. I'll cry." He'd given her a pained look and let her go. She returned to her room. Dressed herself in her normal sleep clothes and given the dress back. Then crawled into bed and let herself cry and think by turns until the first hint of dawn crept into the room.


	18. Books and Kisses

Leah washed and dressed. Part of her wanted to sit outside Alistair’s room and wait for him, a very large part if she was honest. But a smaller, wiser part counselled caution and she listened to it reluctantly choosing instead to make her way to the courtyard she and Leliana had sat in when they first came to Redcliffe, taking up a perch on the same branch. It was interesting to think that sitting in a tree branch in a castle garden felt familiar. Leah of Earth would have scoffed at the idea. Leah of Earth would be getting ready for work right now. Catching a train. Battling through crowds of people. Ordering a coffee and sipping it while music played through headphones and she smiled politely at charity asker's while deftly side stepping them. Home seemed a long way away. 

"The gardeners here should be commended. This tree always has at least one beautiful woman in it whenever I see it," Alistair said, looking up at her as he made his way over. 

"Well one beautiful woman and one Leah last time" she shot back darkly. 

He gave her a crooked smile "that was meant as a joke at the time you know." 

"Backfired a bit, didn't it?" 

"A lot, actually. I missed out on months with you." 

Leah frowned and plucked at a nearby leaf, "how was the Arl?" 

"Ugh." 

"Hmm" 

They were silent for a moment. Alistair eventually sighing and scrubbing a hand through his hair. "Will you come down? People will think I'm talking to a tree." 

Leah snapped off a leaf and twirled it in her fingers. "How Elven of you." 

"You do that better. Please?" 

"I'm communing with nature, Alistair. Leave me be." 

He sat on the bench and sighed. "I'm sorry." 

"Don't be." 

"You're being all..." he waved a hand listlessly before him, "with me now." 

"Aloof?" 

"I don't know. Maybe? Distant?" 

Leah let the leaf fall and tucked her hands into her lap, staring at them. "I had an interesting dance with Tegan." 

"Yes, he said." 

"So they've told you their plans then?" 

Alistair stood his agitation clear as he paced restlessly, "it wasn't my idea! I never wanted this. Never asked for it. I've never been asked by anyone about anything in my life until... Well, until..." 

"Until Duncan" Leah said quietly.

"Yes," he sighed heavily, "and then it only lasted six months and it still meant my choices were limited." 

"Everyone's choices are," Leah replied sadly.

"Really? What limitations are on you?" Alistair asked hotly.

Leah bristled and jumped down from her branch, landing firmly and stalking towards him "what limitations? Like I'm not a stranger in this world. Like I don't feel displaced and uncertain and out of my depth. You had an awful childhood and I'm sorry Alistair. Truly. If I could somehow go back in time and rescue you from what you went through I would do it, gladly and unreservedly. But at some point, my handsome, brave, witty, kind Warden you need to put that aside and think about the man you want to be. Are you your own person or are you the puppet who dances to please others?" She stopped sharply in front of him, gaze locked fiercely to his as she radiated anger. 

Alistair opened his mouth to speak and then closed it with a click. He swallowed. Nodded. "You're right." 

Leah softened and scrubbed a hand through her hair, catching herself and smiling when she realised it was a mimic of Alistair’s usual gesture. She huffed a laugh, "yeah, well, it had to happen eventually." 

"Leah?" 

"Alistair." 

"You looked incredibly fierce just then." 

She huffed, "I was really mad." 

He stepped closer and drew her in, dropping his head to whisper in her ear. "It was incredibly attractive." 

Leah laughed and tilted her head back "oh yeah? Prove it." 

He grinned and swept her up in his arms, kissing her deeply, "Come with me." 

Hand in hand they made their way back to Leah's room, Alistair giving her a chagrined smile and shaking his head. Leading her on and up narrow stairs and dusty corridors until they reached a large door, on the other side of which was a library complete with plump chairs covered in dust cloths. 

"Nobody comes here. It belonged to the Arls mother. Her reading room." 

"How do you know about it?" 

"Nobody cared where I went, as long as I was out of sight. This was my favourite place. I've read nearly every book" he said, tugging the dust cover off the longest of the chairs and sitting. Leah curled up beside him, resting her head on his chest. 

"I wish I knew you then. We could have been friends." 

He grinned "you're just saying that now you've seen my secret book room." 

Leah grimaced, "am I that transparent? Damn. Anyway, I was told I looked fiercely beautiful. I need proof of this claim.” She sat up, slipping a leg over Alistair’s and turning so she sat facing him, close enough to touch her nose to his. 

Alistair sucked in a quick breath of surprise and adjusted how he was sitting. Leah stopped him with a kiss and he groaned. "Leah, I had hoped... I wanted to wait until it was perfect." 

"You're perfect. We're in a room full of books, that's perfect too. People are trying to keep us apart and I will fight for you, Alistair. Fight hard." 

"And I for you." 

"Perfect." 

“Leah, this isn’t going to be like the Brecilian Forrest is it? Where you promise me kisses and then fall asleep?” Alistair teased, tugging gently at a long curl of her hair.

Leah snorted a laugh and then quickly covered her mouth, “I’m so sorry, I had every intention of… anyway, I’m wide awake now.”

“Perfect,” Alistair replied, leaning in to capture her lips in a kiss.


	19. I think I need a night-light

Leah shivered, blinking rapidly as they entered Orzammar. The last fingers of sunlight disappearing and leaving them in a perpetual half-light that was gloomy to her eyes. She flexed her fingers, reaching for and clasping Alistair’s hand which was never far from hers anymore, smiling softly to herself when she felt a squeeze of fingers in return. Ahead of them Aedan openly gazed in wonder at the cavernous Thaig and the statues that lined the pathway they walked. Zevran and Leliana were to Leah’s left, Morrigan was off to the right, aloof and distant to the casual observer, but standing a lot closer than she had previously. Even she seemed to find the cavern daunting.

They entered the city proper and Leah’s breath caught at the sheer vastness of it. The space felt less claustrophobic than the path they’d taken to get here and she relaxed at the feeling of space once more. Alistair pressed a kiss to her temple and then moved to join Aedan, the two of them conferring quietly together for long moments. Leah’s gaze drifted over the city and her ears pricked to the sounds of life – people calling out indistinctly, the rumble and movement of carts and a gentle, ever-present hum that played at the edge of her hearing, teasing her with the promise of understanding if she’d only listen harder. She frowned slightly and then jumped when a cool hand touched her arm, giving a startled squeak in surprise.

“I did not think you scared so easily,” Morrigan said coolly.

Leah scoffed, “you think too highly of me. I hated the dark as a child, this place is giving me the creeps.” She brushed at the goosebumps on her arm and fidgeted. “I didn’t think it would be so noisy either.”

“You mean the echo’s? I hadn’t found them so loud,” Morrigan replied, her yellow-eyed gaze sliding over their surroundings.

“More that constant musical sound, it’s pitched low. I didn’t hear it at first, but now I’ve noticed it it’s all I can hear. Like when you get a few lines of song stuck in your head, you know?”

Morrigan quirked a brow in response and turned her full attention to Leah, her gaze narrowing in concentration as she tilted her head to one side. “I hear no such sound” she said after a moment.

“Maybe it’s just me,” Leah replied.

“Perhaps.”

They stood in silence for a little while longer, waiting for Aedan and Alistair. Finally they started walking again, following the path to the Diamond Quarter, entering the Assembly and producing the Grey Warden treaties. Leah waited outside with everyone else, standing between Leliana and Zevran as they peered over the balcony to the city below. The three of them quietly chatting about small things, pointing out curiosities and idly wondering if there was a tavern nearby when the Assembly door opened and a furious Aedan strode out.

“-need something, everyone wants us to run their damn errands. I do hope the Blight waits for us!” he seethed to Alistair.

Alistair made a placating gesture, his expression pained. “I know and I agree. But we don’t have much choice if we want their help. Unless you think we could do without them? We have the Mages and the Arl and even the Dalish, although I’m not sure they’ll actually show up.”

“I’m not sure any of them will. Look at the size of the army that fell at Ostagar. We’re going to need everyone, brother.”

“That was different,” Alistair said, “and this time we won’t have to worry about Loghain.”

“That we know of. The man sent an assassin after us and let Howe murder my family. Who knows what more he’s capable of?” Aedan snapped, raising a hand to rub at his temple as though warding off a headache. “Fine, lets… I don’t know. I need a drink.”

They left the Diamond Quarter and a few hastily given directions and several wrong turns later ended up in a tavern. Leah and Zevran securing a table large enough to accommodate all of them while the others ordered drinks and food before joining them. Alistair slid into a seat next to Leah and wrapped his arm around her shoulders, pulling her in close for a side hug before releasing her.

“It didn’t go well?” Leah asked. Alistair grimaced and shook his head, his gaze falling on Aedan.

“Not really, no. There’s a problem with the king.”

“The problem being that he’s dead,” Aedan said hotly, “there’s contention over who the successor is and that means there’s a power struggle going on. Instead of sorting themselves out they want two Grey Warden’s in the middle of a blight to help them. Maker’s Breath, none of this was in the stories I read about Grey Warden’s as a child.”

“Want a refund?” Leah asked teasingly.

Aedan shot her a dark look and then smiled in spite of himself “something like that, yes.”

“Just as long as we don’t have to enter the Deep Roads themselves,” Leliana said, leaning forward to rest her elbows on the table, “I have no desire to see the birthplace of Darkspawn.”

“I’m afraid I’m about to disappoint you then,” Aedan replied, giving her a crooked smile.

Leliana sighed, letting her cheek rest in her upturned hand as she looked at Aedan. “Very well, but I warn you, my Warden, I do not enjoy the dark.”

Aedan’s grin turned wicked and he smirked, “I’m sure we’ll find ways to overcome the aversion.”

Alistair sighed and nudged Leliana with his shoulder, “alright you two, plan first, canoodle later.”

They all leant forward and began to discuss what would be needed.

Later, when they’d stocked up on everything they could think of and loitered and lingered well past having an excuse to do so, they approached the Deep Roads entrance. Leliana linked arms with Leah and shivered, the two of them ducking their heads close and speaking quietly about how they didn’t really want to go. Aedan walking closely behind them as Alistair, Zevran and Morrigan lead the way. Of all of them Morrigan seemed the most interested in their destination and seemed to be paying particular attention to the various statues and murals on the wall. At one point pausing at a shattered object that appeared to have been an ornate mirror frame. Leah frowned in thought but remained silent.

They’d only just entered the Deep Roads proper, time enough for Leah to ponder if this would be their entire party, when they heard a belch and bellow behind them. Leah smothered a grin and winced at the smell, not saying a word when Oghren joined them. To her immense enjoyment he started pestering Morrigan soon after, offering her pickled eel and suggesting that he’d be able to keep her warm at night. When Morrigan zapped him with electricity he chuckled and made a ribald remark about that being a fun trick for later. Leliana’s laughter drew his attention next, although Aedan’s pointed glare made him move on to Leah, who suffered his conversation until they stopped for a rest hours later.

“Alright, love?” Alistair asked, stepping up behind her and sliding a hand around her waist.

“Fine now” she replied, ignoring Oghren’s snort of disgust.

They moved on again quickly. Leah couldn’t help but admire the faded beauty of the tunnels they walked. The precision of the stone walkway, the perfect geometry of the archways and the fine detail on the statues. It was easy to see how this could once have been a roadway that bustled with life. At intervals markings appeared on the floor and wall, ridged patterns that were all lines and sharp angles, and called to Leah to touch them. She shivered and crossed her arms over her chest, tucking her hands in under her arms to help fight the urge to reach out.

Time moved on and at some point Aedan declared they needed to setup camp. Leah had no idea how long they’d been down here, with no sun to guide her she felt displaced and not entirely well. She slept fitfully that night and the next, waking with a headache and a ringing in her ears that grew louder with each passing hour, making it difficult to concentrate. They moved on, the gloomy tunnels beginning to take on an ominous feel that made Leah feel small and frightened, she tucked in tighter to Alistair’s side and was so consumed with her own thoughts that she missed his worried looks. The days and tunnels blurred and she could find no rest. Would not eat unless Alistair made her. Wasn’t thirsty until he handed her a water skin. The entire time the buzzing in her head grew louder and louder.

The next time they rested it was Leah’s screams that woke them. Their group were used to the cries of the Warden’s at night, which had worsened in the Deep Roads, but while their groans were pained, Leah’s screams were shrill and echoed loudly. She woke at Alistair’s urging, tears blurring her vision.

“I’m worried about you,” he’d whispered.

“I’m so sorry” she’d replied, fingers gently tracing the dark smudges under his eyes, “sorry, my love.”

He’d kissed her, held her tightly – her back to his chest – and they’d lain there for a little longer while their friends tried to sleep. “I hate this place,” she’d whispered softly, pressing back into Alistair when his arm tightened in response.

At another stop later on in their journey - Leah had lost track of time entirely by this stage - she found her tired feet walking her away from the camp a short way, her fingers trailing the tunnel wall as she walked. Before her a beautiful blue vein of lyrium thrummed with energy – its veins stretched out like the branches of a great tree – and without conscious thought she reached out and touched it. At first nothing happened and then a jolt of energy shot through her fingers and up her arm with enough force and heat to make her scream. Images assaulted her mind, she saw the Deep Roads alive with life and commerce, busy and bustling with traders and travellers as they travelled from various Thaigs. She could hear the noise and chatter of people and wagons like a wave of sound that engulfed her, dragged her under, let her taste the cold stone, smell the hot lava and feel the energy of Lyrium in her like a living presence. More than that, somehow deeper than those memories, was music. A song that had always been there, that wrapped around everything and etched its words onto her bones – beautiful at first, but then souring and darkening into something tainted, sickly and wrong. More visions assaulted her senses, terrible things, blackness, pain, betrayal and fear. A sirens call that turned into an agonised scream. Just when the feeling became too much, when she was sure that she’d lose herself to its fury, the pain stopped. Leah fell to the ground and knew no more.

*

When Leah woke she wasn’t entirely sure she hadn’t dreamed the entire event. She was on the bedroll she shared with Alistair, his left arm stretched beneath her head like a pillow while his right curled over her waist and rested on her stomach. She reached for that hand and pulled it higher, kissing it and then tangling her fingers through his.

“You’re awake,” he said brokenly, his warm breath sighing over the back of her neck as he buried his face in her hair. “Maker’s Breath, Leah. I thought I’d lost you.”

Leah tried to sit and cried out, her hand flying to her forehead and the pain that needled hard and persistent there. “What happened?” she asked, her voice cracking.

Alistair held her closer still and a shudder ran through him. “I’m not exactly sure. You were looking at a lyrium vein and then you screamed, it was harrowing Leah. I never want to hear that much pain again. Then you fell. You… Leah, you were so still. I thought… I thought you were…” he gripped her tightly and she felt his shaky exhale.

“Alistair, I’m sorry. I would never scare you like that on purpose.” She wriggled and then turned in his embrace so they were nose to nose, her hands tucked up between them. She took in the worn look on his features, the red rimmed and bloodshot eyes and the dark smudges beneath them. “Sorry” she said softly, placing a gentle kiss against his lips, “I’m so sorry, my love. My handsome, brave Warden.”

He huffed a breath, part sigh, part laugh and kissed her in return, “don’t leave me, Leah. Please. I need you.”

Leah hummed under her breath, letting her fingers skate up over his face and trail across his temples to tangle in his hair. She could feel the buzzing in the base of her skull once more, knew that it would consume her again shortly, but ignored it for now. Instead staring into Alistair’s warm brown eyes and tugged him closer, “show me how much” she whispered, gasping softly when he eagerly obliged.

*

The next time Leah woke she could ignore the buzzing no longer and groaned as she clutched her head. The barrage of images she’d been given playing more slowly through her mind, allowing her some capacity to filter through them. She felt warm hands reach for her and help her to sit and accepted a cup laced with elfroot potion, downing the contents with a grimace and trying to breath carefully and shallowly until the pain lessened.

“I hate this place so much,” she muttered, handing the cup back. She stood and stretched a little to loosen her stiff limbs, stumbling a little and throwing out a hand to catch herself on the wall. A moment later her mouth opened in silent scream and she wrenched her arm back, cradling it against her chest. “Alistair!”

“Here, Leah. Right here” came the quick reply.

Leah’s eyes blurred with tears, “we need to go, please, please Alistair. Let’s go back.”

“Leah, we can’t. Not yet, my love.”

Leah felt a sob tear itself from her chest and she sagged, shuddering and crying, “please, Alistair.”

“Leah…”

Leah gripped him tightly, burying her face in his chest and heedless of how the hard surface of his armour hurt her cheeks. She could hear Aedan angrily asking what was going on and Alistair’s bewildered reply before Aedan jerked her out of his embrace and turned her towards him. His eyes flashed as he spoke and Leah wasn’t certain if he was angry or afraid.

“Tell me what’s wrong, Leah.”

“We need to go, right now. There’s nothing here for us but death, Aedan. You have to believe me. It was a mistake to come here at all.”

Aedan was still for several heartbeats and then swallowed heavily, “and where did this dire warning come from?”

“There’s been a buzzing in my head since we walked into this damn mountain. It’s gotten worse and worse. It’s so loud in here, it makes my head ache. Then, when I touched the lyrium, I could see everything. Everything. I’ve seen the Deep Roads when they’re full of life, I’ve seen beautiful Thaig’s in their glory-“

“That doesn’t sound so-“

“-and I’ve seen the Darkspawn taint corrupt the stone and infect lyrium. It’s alive, you know. It’s this giant consciousness and it sees and feels everything. It’s everywhere. Even deep down in the dark where the darkspawn hide and the light turns red. Where they’re made. I’ve seen that too. That’s why we have to go.” She shuddered convulsively then, hands clutching tightly at her stomach and face ghostly pale.

Aedan swore and ground his teeth together, staring hard at Leah, shaking his head and walking away a few steps, then walking back towards her. “Leah, I can’t just give this up because you’re frightened. I need all the soldiers I can get; we need the Dwarves and they won’t help if we don’t do this. I’m… I’m sorry, I know your frightened, but… it’ll be alright. You’ve got Alistair, you’ve got Zev and you’ve got me. You’re safe, Leah. I promise.”

Leah let out a shuddering breath and more tears spilled out as she met Aedan’s gaze. “I’m not lying, Aedan Cousland.”

“I never said you were, but I need you to be brave. You travel with Wardens, little blade.”

Leah nodded once and dragged in a breath, straightening once more and swiping at the tears that kept falling. “Alright,” she said softly.

Aedan exhaled heavily, watching her for a moment before giving the signal for them to continue on. Leah followed, hugging Alistair’s arm as she walked beside him. Refusing to speak for the rest of the day and willing herself to ignore the buzzing that was now so loud she felt she’d go insane.

*

Leah lasted another two days before the fear and overwhelming sense of wrongness bested her again. She backed up until her back hit the stone wall of the tunnels "please, I know I sound crazy right now. I know it. But there is something terrible down here... Something horrific and we have to go. Please! I-I can't. I can't" she drew in a ragged breath, eyes burning with tears and the effort of holding them in "please, Alistair." 

"Leah... Sweetheart" he reached for her tentatively and she shuddered and three herself at him, huddling into him. 

"Tighter," she whispered when he hugged her, holding onto him when he obliged and wrapped himself tightly around her. 

"I swear, my love, that I will not let anything hurt you" he said fiercely into her hair. Breath warm against her skin. 

"It already hurts," she whimpered.

"Oh Leah. We have to do this. The blight..." he sighed, “we don’t have a choice.” 

"This will make things worse." She shuddered "but if you promise me one thing I'll go." 

"Anything." 

"If we're attacked, if Darkspawn look to be overwhelming us. I need you to kill me. Any female in our party really." 

"...except that. Leah what are you talking about? I could never-" 

Leah shuddered "there are far worse things than a clean death... Why do you think I'm so afraid?" 

"It won't happen." 

"But if it does. I need to know that-" 

"No! Leah, stop it. I know you're scared, and I'm sorry, but I won't indulge you in this madness. Enough!" Alistair shouted, his voice echoing in the closed cavern and making their friends look uncomfortable. He groaned and sagged against her an instant later, his hands cradling her face, “I’m sorry, Leah. Forgive me." 

"No, it's alright. I shouldn't have pressed. I do love you, Alistair. So much." 

He brushed a kiss against her cheek "Leah, you are my heart's desire. I love you. I'll protect you always." 

"I know. I’m sorry, Alistair, I’m trying," she replied, stepping up on top toe to kiss him softly. 

"Come on, let me hold you while we sleep. I need you close." 

"Making sure I don't run away?" 

He huffed a laugh that sounded strained, "yes." 

Leah felt guilty as they setup their bedrolls and Alistair lay down on his side, waiting until she was comfortable before curling around her and engulfing her with his warmth. She shouldn't feel safe here, shouldn't breathe easier because her Warden was on edge and on guard for her, but she did. 

*

Leah’s breath shuddered on every inhale and exhale. Her entire body shook with every step. It was almost a relief when Hespith’s song became audible to everyone else. Almost.

“This is what you’ve been hearing?” Leliana asked, eyes wide and expression horrified.

“Yes,” Leah whispered, gripping tightly to Alistair and reaching a hand back to touch Zevran as he crowded her back, his muttered curses and warmth almost a balm against her tortured mind.

Aedan stood rigid, eyes narrowed in determination and hands clasped tightly onto his daggers. “Right. We kill the broodmother, we rescue what’s left of Oghren’s family, we get the hell out of this void-taken nightmare and I spend the rest of my life apologising to Leah for thinking she was scared of her own shadow.”

“Thank you, Aedan.” 

“Can’t your creepy visions ever show you anything nice?” Alistair asked, giving her a sardonic smile.

“Is this the right time to tell you I can hear the taint in you and Aedan as well?” Leah asked, eyes staring fixedly into the middle distance, head slightly tilted, “your blood sings to her, she knows we’re here.”

“That’s a no to the nice visions then,” Zevran said dryly, “truly, my dear Leah, you are making it difficult to enjoy your company of late.”

“Sorry, Zev.”

“Ah, my bella, we will make a lewd story of this yet. I promise you. Well then, dear Wardens, shall we assist this broodmother by ending her misery?” Zevran twirled a dagger in his fingers, giving Leah a wink as he passed her. His eyes widening in surprise when she placed a kiss on his cheek.

“For luck” she said sadly.

“I’m glad that was luck and not goodbye. I would be most upset with you, Leah.”

Leah’s fragile smile in return made him sigh.

*

The trip back was easier, although far more subdued. Zevran had been surprised by Leah’s near constant presence at his side, quirking a brow at her in question. Leah was still not herself, too quiet and too lost in her own head for his liking. She’d blinked owlishly at him and taken a long moment to answer, as though trying to find her way back to speak, which worried him.

“I can hear you” she’d said eventually. Then, as though registering his confusion, she’d added, “I mean I can hear elven in you. It’s like music. You don’t even know that you know it, but it sings inside of you. Words and stories and history. It’s all in your blood, living in you, making you. It’s beautiful, Zev.”

He’d been decidedly uncomfortable after that conversation and taken extra turns on watch to avoid her while he thought about it. Pointedly ignoring the sad looks Leah gave him over the camp fire they allowed themselves for stops they considered to be ‘night’, although night was an almost impossible concept in this place, the perpetual gloom wearing them all down to the point that everything irritated them. Their group only spoke to each other when it was essential and even then words between them were curt. Aedan and Leliana were spending more and more time apart. Morrigan was barely seen. Alistair stayed close by Leah’s side but spoke little, seeming to need physical contact with her more than anything else. Zevran had more than once found his fingers dancing over the hilt of his daggers, daydreaming about throwing one at Oghren who did nothing but stink, talk and belch.

It was a relief when they reached Orzammar once more. Zevran nodding in acknowledgement as Alistair, Aedan and Leah departed for the Assembly while he followed Morrigan and Leliana to the tavern they’d found their first time here. They made a sombre group as they sat at a table, silent and still while lively conversations happened around them. A few hours later, when the Warden’s returned with Leah there was the option to stay and rest or depart.

They all wanted to depart. 

The closer they got to the surface, the livelier Leah became. Her demeanour changing from frightened girl clutching at Alistair back to Leah who could smile and joke. As they reached the highest level of the pathway she turned to Zevran and grinned.

“Race you to the door?”

He smirked and their racing footsteps echoed loudly as they ran. Shoulders bumping in playful shoves as they both tried to squeeze through the narrow gap of the opening door at the same time. Once outside Leah tilted her face to the sun, which thankfully sat high in the sky, running her hands through her hair as though shaking out the last of Orzammar’s gloom from its length.

“Never again,” she said out loud, eyes fixed on the endless blue, “I will never set foot in that hellish place ever again.”

“You seem much revived, my bella.”

“I can’t hear a damn thing out here, no twisted song, no taint. Even your elven is quieter, although I’m sorry for that, it was beautiful.” She opened her eyes and smiled at him, “I’m sorry, Zev. I know it makes you uncomfortable. I won’t talk about it anymore. Let’s just pretend I need you close because you’re irresistibly gorgeous and I lust for you.”

Zevran smirked and winked at her, “I never assumed otherwise, dear Leah.”

*

That evening as they set up camp, after having put as much space as possible between themselves and Orzammar, Alistair was surprised to have Leah stop him from putting up their tent. She picked up their bedroll in one hand, held his hand in the other and lead him towards the fire, crouching down to spread the bedroll out.

“Leah, what are you doing?” he asked as she tugged him down to lay beside her.

“Hoping to coax you into public sex?” she’d replied with a small grin. His heart had skipped at the grin more than the words, the sight of it had made the last of the tension in his shoulders loosen and leave. He’d smirked at her and let her pull him down beside her.

“I need to sleep in the open. To see the stars. I just… I can’t…” she’d broken off, biting her lip then, her jaw working as she fought back tears.

“Leah,” he’d said softly, brushing a hand through her hair, “whatever you want. Your desire is my command.”

She’d sighed then and he could feel the last of her tension and anxiety drain out of her as she relaxed for the first time since leaving Orzammar, curling up at his side and gazing at the stars with him until they both drifted off into a dreamless sleep.

*

(party banter)

Leah laughed under her breath as Alistair tousled with Barkspawn before giving him his dinner. Her laughter increased when both dog and man turned to give her inquisitive looks.

“He thinks you’re silly, but he loves you fiercely,” Leah said, grinning at them both.

“I’m not sure who you’re talking to” Alistair said teasingly.

“True, it could apply to either one of you.”

“Hey… well, as long as the feeling is mutual. You’re a good boy, aren’t you? Yes, you are.” 

Barkspawn woofed in approval.

“He also prefers Leliana’s cooking to yours,” Leah said, eyes flashing with amusement.

“Well that’s because he’s a clever boy. Yes, a clever good boy. Leliana is a much better cook”

Leah laughed again, her heart feeling lighter than it had in weeks.


	20. Politics and powders

Leah sat back heavily on the sofa and worried at her lower lip with her teeth while her fingers tapped against the arm of the chair. Beside her Zevran tucked a finger into his book to mark the page and gently closed it, giving her a questioning glance. Leah huffed and gave him a crooked smile in return, gaze returning to the closed door on the other side of the room once more. Zevran allowed himself a glance at the door as well and then returned to his book, getting in two more pages before marking his place yet again when Leah growled under her breath and shifted restlessly. Long minutes later the door opened and Alistair emerged looking harried. 

“Hey, you” Leah called, jumping up from her seat and crossing the room towards him.

Alistair’s face brightened as Leah approached, he reached out a hand to her and reeled her in close and held her, dropping a kiss on her head. “You know I’m still not used to having a beautiful lady pouncing on me at all hours of the day.”

“Is that a complaint?” 

He grinned and gently tilted her head back “No, my love. Far from it.”

They stood close, grinning at each other, forgetting the rest of the world until someone cleared their throat pointedly and Leah glanced past Alistair to see Eamon watching them. She felt herself become rigid and Alistair’s hold tighten on her in response.

“Come walk with me, my lady?”

Leah nodded, burrowing in close to Alistair as he guided her out of the library and towards a small garden that boasted a fountain at its centre and several bench seats scattered artfully around the green lawn. Alistair led them to one that was partly obscured by a hedge and sat heavily, pulling Leah into his lap and circling his arms around her waist. He sighed and held her close in silence for long minutes, sighing again in contentment when Leah trailed her fingers through his hair and let her nails gently scrape his scalp.

“Mhm, ask me for anything and it’s yours if you keep that up” he muttered, letting his head hang to give her more access.

Leah laughed softly, tucking the information away for future use as she continued to stroke him. “Are you alright?” 

“Better now” he mumbled, nuzzling into her neck, his hot breath washing over her skin and making her smile.

“Are you going to tell me what happened?”

Alistair groaned and held her closer still, “nothing good. The Arl wants me to rescue Anora, not because it’s the right thing to do as she’s the reigning monarch, but because it might help marriage negotiations. He wants me to marry my dead half-brothers’ wife. Am I the only one who thinks that’s a bit strange?”

Leah couldn’t supress the shudder that ran through her, turning her head so her forehead touched his. “Oh” she said softly, unable to stop her eyes tearing up. Eamon’s persistence in Alistair being made king was wearing her down. The entire trip to Denerim he’d found reason after reason to keep Alistair away from their party, meaning that Leah barely saw him. Even Morrigan had made a passing remark that Alistair’s absence felt forced and strange, and Leah knew that the two of them hated each other endlessly.

Alistair looked up at her and startled, a hand raising to cup her cheek, “Leah, no, please don’t look at me like that. You must know that I’m yours. Only yours. I’ve told him over and over that I don’t want to be king and I certainly don’t want Anora.”

“I know” Leah replied, trying to smile, “I don’t doubt you, Alistair, I’m just tired of it. He’s like a dog with a bone and I miss you. It’s lonely sleeping without you.”

Alistair groaned and pulled her down for a kiss that left Leah breathless. “It’s impossible to sleep without you. I wake up with blankets and all of the pillow, it’s unnerving.”

“Hey!” she said, swatting him playfully and trying to scowl at his laugh. They settled close to one another again and Leah traced her fingers down his cheek and along the line of his jaw, enjoying the scratch of stubble there. “What can I do to help?”

“Nothing. I’ve explained that I’m a Warden and that I’m not interested in being a King and, more than all of that, that you and I are together so it’s impossible.”

“And what does he say?”

Alistair’s jaw tightened and his gaze hardened as his eyes narrowed so that he glared at the middle-distance before him, “that every boy is infatuated with his first love, but that a man gives up his dalliances in favour of duty – particularly when that duty is to a country.”

“Wow, what an ass.”

“I’m inclined to agree.”

Leah sighed and curled into his chest, holding him tightly. “Thank you” she murmured.

Alistair straightened and looked down at her curiously, “for what?”

“Fighting for me. I know it must be hard and… just, thank you. It means a lot.”

Alistair grinned and brushed his lips to hers, kissing her deeply once more. “Always, Leah.” 

“Alistair, now would be a really good time to show me your room” she said, leaving a trail of kisses up to his ear, “and showing me how well it locks behind us, my love.”

She felt the silent laughter that rumbled through him as he stood, holding her against him and lowering her slowly to her feet. “What a good idea, d’you know I even have curtains that close really well?”

“You don’t say”

“It’s true, and it’s far away from everyone else in our party. Can’t hear a thing.”

“How wonderous.”

They grinned at each other and started to laugh as their hands met and fingers tangled, Alistair leading Leah back inside and surreptitiously checking that the coast was clear before leading her down a hallway in the opposite direction to where the majority of their rooms were. They’d almost reached the furthest room in the hallway when a side door opened and Aedan emerged, his gaze travelling over them and a smirk forming on his lips.

“I hate to interrupt-” 

“Then don’t!” Leah cut in crossly, fingers tightening on Alistair’s.

“-but I need you both. It’ll only take a minute.”

“Someone had better be dying” Leah said darkly, turning on her heel and following after Aedan, feeling slightly mollified when Alistair’s muttered curses reached her ears.

They retraced their steps down the hallway and into the room Leliana, Morrigan and Leah were sharing. Leah frowned to see Zevran reclining on her bed, his flirtatious wink catching her off-guard and causing her to dismiss the casual flip of his hand. An instant later Alistair grunted and tripped, his hand wrenched out of Leah’s as she uttered a small scream and tried to catch him. Aedan’s arms whipped out first and secured Alistair before he hit the floor, lowering him down gently.

“What is going on?” Leah snarled, “Just what are you playing at, Zev?”

“Apologies, my dear Leah, I didn’t mean to startle you. It is a knockout powder and will do no harm other than a nasty headache when he wakes.”

“And how soon will that be?” Leah asked, dropping to her knees beside Alistair.

“An hour, perhaps two”

“Why?” Leah asked sharply.

“I asked him to, Leah” Aedan said, handing her a pillow and watching as she propped Alistair’s head up with it. “I know what Eamon has planned, I heard Alistair fighting it. I have a solution to the problem.”

“We let Anora rot? Because I’m for that” Leah replied, fingers brushing back Alistair’s hair.

“We can’t do that. But she doesn’t need Alistair to save her when I can.”

“You- wait, are you doing this to help Alistair or because you want to marry Anora and be King?”

“I don’t want to marry Anora.”

“Good- wait, you want to be King?”

Aedan shrugged, “I’m a Cousland, I know the courts and the nobles. I have the bloodline. I’m not opposed to the idea.”

“God, Aedan. Are you sure?”

“Would you rather Alistair be Eamon’s puppet?”

“No! But, I don’t want you to be either”

Aedan snorted derisively and looked smug, “that will never happen, Leah.”

She nodded slowly, fingers tracing gently over Alistair’s face before leaning forward to place a kiss to his cheek.

“It will help him keep you” Aedan said softly, returning Leah’s soft smile with one of his own, “really it’s all for you, but we’ll keep that part quiet.”

Leah snorted and held out a hand, pulling herself up as Aedan grasped it.

“Well then, lets go rescue the Queen.”

“Former Queen” Aedan said lightly.

“Stop it, I’ll fall in love with you too.”

“I thought you wanted me for your friend, Katie?”

“You would love her, Aedan. I swear to God you two would make beautiful babies. And I feel bad saying that, because I know Leliana is beautiful, but she doesn’t hold a candle to my Katie.”

Aedan gave her an indulgent look, signalling to Zevran to join them as they stepped around Alistair and left the room, closing the door behind them firmly. He nodded to Wynne as they passed her and exchanged quiet words about watching over Alistair until he woke before they made their way to Howe’s estate.


End file.
